Ex best friend

This poll is closed

Text her ?!?

Text her 33%

don't text her67%

Total votes: 3

Hey i need some advice, basically almost a year ago my best friend got a boyfriend she then began to become more and more distant ....we barely saw each other and so i just took the decision to stop contacting her - this was so hard for me and i miss her very much.
Around christmas we exchanged gifts - it was the polite thing to do and as her birthday was in february i also got her a gift then to. My birthday came around in march i got nothing not even a message.

The thing is i still really really miss her and though we havent spoken in months i kind of want to know whether i should message her to see if we could 're connect' before uni starts ??
any advice would be much appreciated! btw we were best friends for 6 years before this happened! :frown:

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 1

Arvin Bhambra

12

Original post by lgrg

Hey i need some advice, basically almost a year ago my best friend got a boyfriend she then began to become more and more distant ....we barely saw each other and so i just took the decision to stop contacting her - this was so hard for me and i miss her very much.
Around christmas we exchanged gifts - it was the polite thing to do and as her birthday was in february i also got her a gift then to. My birthday came around in march i got nothing not even a message.

The thing is i still really really miss her and though we havent spoken in months i kind of want to know whether i should message her to see if we could 're connect' before uni starts ??
any advice would be much appreciated!

message her before Uni and get everything off of your chest. last thing you need is added stress while at Uni

Reply 2

Withengar

18

Let me get this straight.

She got a boyfriend, and then she basically stopped interacting with you. Then, after you got her a gift both for Christmas and her birthday, once your birthday rolled around, she didn't have enough decency to even message you? That is ludicrous. That is absolutely disgusting. People who shun you and abandon everyone else in their life once they enter a relationship are poor kids of people to begin with. You don't want to be friends with someone like that.

This person doesn't value you, doesn't respect you and doesn't treat you as well as you've treated her. You've done your bit, she ignored you afterwards. Forget all about her, go to University and make new friends and move on. Best of luck.

Reply 3

Alextaylor6

14

She might have been your best friend, but you wern't hers. Move on and make soome new friends at uni, gl

Reply 4

theBranicAc

3

Original post by Withengar

Let me get this straight.

She got a boyfriend, and then she basically stopped interacting with you. Then, after you got her a gift both for Christmas and her birthday, once your birthday rolled around, she didn't have enough decency to even message you? That is ludicrous. That is absolutely disgusting. People who shun you and abandon everyone else in their life once they enter a relationship are poor kids of people to begin with. You don't want to be friends with someone like that.

This person doesn't value you, doesn't respect you and doesn't treat you as well as you've treated her. You've done your bit, she ignored you afterwards. Forget all about her, go to University and make new friends and move on. Best of luck.

Original post by Alextaylor6

She might have been your best friend, but you wern't hers. Move on and make soome new friends at uni, gl

the savage truth^^

Reply 5

Alextaylor6

14

Original post by theBranicAc

the savage truth^^

Best friends are who you ride and die with, not ditch after getting a boyfriend

Reply 6

bat_man

2

I'd probably vent in a message, then just not give a damn at all. She has new things atm "boyfriend",but once its over shell realise she missed you prob and regret it. Not ur fault tho.

Reply 7

SinsNotTragedies

3

Original post by lgrg

Hey i need some advice, basically almost a year ago my best friend got a boyfriend she then began to become more and more distant ....we barely saw each other and so i just took the decision to stop contacting her - this was so hard for me and i miss her very much.
Around christmas we exchanged gifts - it was the polite thing to do and as her birthday was in february i also got her a gift then to. My birthday came around in march i got nothing not even a message.

The thing is i still really really miss her and though we havent spoken in months i kind of want to know whether i should message her to see if we could 're connect' before uni starts ??
any advice would be much appreciated! btw we were best friends for 6 years before this happened! :frown:

I think you need closure in the form of telling her how you feel. There is an air of uncertainty there and you need to clear up exactly what happened - to clarify to yourself that she isn't worth your friendship.
I feel the pain, for slightly different reasons, but nonetheless I know what you're going through. Missing her is going to be natural and normal because she was a big part of your life for 6 years. However, that doesn't mean you should stick with old routine and continue being friends with her, it signifies that she's moved on and she obviously has no regrets about it (do you really want to be in a friendship with her if that's the case?) so I think you need to move on too.

University is a big life change and there is no need to reconnect before you start, I get that you probably want something in your life that is constant and familiar, but you'll make new friends at university and enjoy yourself without carrying the weight of a one-sided friendship back home.

Please try to forget about her, realise that you're worth more than pining after a friend who has moved on. Because you deserve so much more than that.

(edited 7 years ago)

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