Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Advice on this situation..should I just move on..or will he come back?

Announcements Posted on
TSR's new app is coming! Sign up here to try it first >> 17-10-2016
    • Thread Starter

    I have known this guy for 10 years the first few years of our friendship we was strictly friends the best of friends we would talk to one another about anything he was truly my best friend.
    One night when we was doing our usual movie night cuddled up I looked up to say something to him and we kissed and that led on to other things, we then began seeing each other for around a year but it ended. I cut contact with him and changed my number.
    A year passed we saw each other whilst out shopping spoke briefly and exchanged numbers he called we spoke, he had a partner and so did I, we decided to meet up and ended up kissing later we spoke on the phone and decided to not see each other again as we was both in relationships and it wasn't fair on them.
    So we stopped speaking again.
    Last year December I get a call from him I was shocked cause it had been 2 years we hadn't spoke he said he saw my friend and had asked for my number so we decided to meet up he came round to mine and had a little catch up He told me he was in a relationship, but still we ended up sleeping together and it went on like that for months we was always together and when we wasn't he would send texts throughout the day to see how I was doing, it was nice but obviously what we was doing wasn't right because he had a girlfriend so I brang it up to him one morning he said he knows what he's doing isn't right but me and him have such a connection I said should we stop this he said no he doesn't want to, so we carried on I knew it was wrong but I guess I was weak.
    So March this year he began acting distant I brang it up we ended up having a big argument I told him to forget about me and I'll forget about him and that was that It hurt but I slowly began to move on.
    August rolls around he calls me one morning I was surprised He said he misses me and wants to talk can we meet I said yes so we met up we spoke but not the conversation we really needed to have and ended up sleeping together.Few days later he came round again I sat him down and asked what is it you want from me why did you contact me.He said he missed me wanted me back feels there is a reason we keep coming back in each others life he doesn't want to lose me let's do this again properly and see where this goes.
    The next week after having that convo he started acting extremely distant Everytime i called it was I'm busy I'll call you back but he never would the weekend just gone I called in the afternoon he answered saying his sleeping he would call back, no call.So I sent a text asking why all of a sudden he's being so distant, why get back in contact to be acting like this I told him I won't bother him no more and to take care of himself.
    Its been 3 days he hasn't responded.

    looks like you sent that text that killed your friendship with that guy for good. how quickly you get over it is how quickly you find some new friends

    He is using you and playing you for a fool.

    He cheats on his girlfriends/partners with you. He calls you up when he wants some. He will leave it months and months to call you and when he does, you end up sleeping with him.

    Everything you have said, everytime you met up, every time you talked to him on the phone, you end up sleeping with him. It's a game to him. He's just stringing you along and has done for quite a long time now.

    I'm sorry if it's harsh but it needs to be said. I know you are trying to break free from him and it's difficult because of the attachment you feel with him due to your long friendship (from your point of view) but you need to stop jumping when he calls.

    You are clearly better than this by trying to stop this cycle, you just need a bit more time and determination. You are not something that can be picked up and played with when ever he feels like it, so stop making yourself available. You've lost contact with him before and you can again. Next time when he calls, ask who he got your number from, block him and give that person a telling off, they should not be giving your number out without your permission. You deserve so much more than him, it's obvious in your opening post and unlike him, you do actually have a moral compass. You knew it wasn't right sleeping with him when he already had someone and I can see that you are not happy with yourself for doing that. This is not the person you are, he's making you into something you are not. He's dragging you down to his level, are you happy for him to do that?

    Do you want to be his plaything or are you worth more than that? What are you going to do about it?

    Get up, block him, get on with your fabulous life and never lower yourself to his level again. You deserve someone who will not mess you around like this, but you won't find him if you are messing around with this idiot. Delete, block, move on.
Write a reply…


Submit reply


Thanks for posting! You just need to create an account in order to submit the post
  1. this can't be left blank
    that username has been taken, please choose another Forgotten your password?
  2. this can't be left blank
    this email is already registered. Forgotten your password?
  3. this can't be left blank

    6 characters or longer with both numbers and letters is safer

  4. this can't be left empty
    your full birthday is required
  1. Oops, you need to agree to our Ts&Cs to register
  2. Slide to join now Processing…

Updated: August 16, 2016
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Do you like sleeping in a cold room?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.