Feel too scared to talk about mental health

Hi!

I understand the fear completely. Despite how largely visibly accepting society is becoming of those with mental health issues and discussing them openly, there's still an undercurrent of shame that can be overpowering. =( It's an unfortunate truth. I can't tell you in one single answer what your solution is, it's so complicated and unique to our own personal situations, but please know that it's always okay to reach out for help and to advocate for your own health. You've essentially already made the first step by acknowledging that you have issues to work through, many do not even reach that step - so please be proud of yourself for recognizing that you have things to work through and have needs to address. That, in itself, is extremely hard.

I also feel like openness is definitely a skill that you can fall out of, and the only way forward sometimes is to push through it and force yourself to be open (up to a degree), at least that was my own experience! Try to understand that it may be a sad truth that there are those who don't believe mental health is an important issue to address, and may think less of you, but these people should not dictate or define your action plan regarding your mental health. It's important to you, and whoever you end up talking to about it should be somebody who treats you with utmost respect.

I highly recommend arranging that chat with your tutor, particularly if you're afraid of setting up an appointment with a therapist/counsellor, as that can be daunting. Just knowing somebody knows you're struggling can be comforting, and it helps push your boundaries ever so slightly. Good luck, I hope you find support. You deserve care and attention, and do not deserve to be shamed for having needs every single person on the planet has.

- Sol.

I just don’t know mate

Hi!

I’m diagnosed with anxiety so I can totally relate.

Firstly, everyone has mental health! Some suffer from mental illnesses as a result of their mental health, some people have great mental health and others don’t! We all have it, it just affects each individual differently.

Is there something in particular that worries you about talking about it?

It's okay if it takes a while to even begin that process honestly. Maybe take some time to reflect on your own first, if that feels easier. I have a daily journal/log of my emotions and it helps me see that there are patterns that need to be addressed, and it also gives whoever you talk to a good base on what to suggest.

I think I’m worried about it because you are basically telling someone you are mentally ill if you saying you are depressed or anxious that exactly what it is. I just feel like a pussy talking about it

Honestly, I understand. But from personal experience, talking about it really lifted the weight off of my shoulders! Have you got someone you trust that would understand?

I think I had it for years and still can’t myself to open up about it

I have family but I don’t want them to think I’m weak or anything

It can take years! Trust me. I went into mental health services when I was 14, I'm 20 nearly 21 and I've only just managed to be truly open and honest about my needs in therapy. Please don't diminish or punish yourself for that difficulty. I agree with @pepsimaxcherry that once you break through that difficult barrier, it becomes so so much easier and cathartic. I would suggest writing down what you want to say, and then your counsellor/tutor if you decide to go to your tutor/prof, can have a bouncing point.

You could also even try online therapy, I know seven cups do online counselling.

- Sol.

It can take years! Trust me. I went into mental health services when I was 14, I'm 20 nearly 21 and I've only just managed to be truly open and honest about my needs in therapy. Please don't diminish or punish yourself for that difficulty. I agree with @pepsimaxcherry that once you break through that difficult barrier, it becomes so so much easier and cathartic. I would suggest writing down what you want to say, and then your counsellor/tutor if you decide to go to your tutor/prof, can have a bouncing point.

You could also even try online therapy, I know seven cups do online counselling.

- Sol.

Definitely! I struggled for years by myself because I was ashamed to admit how I was feeling, but once I broke the barrier - the weight was off my shoulders! I’m so thankful that I reached out when I did

What if I talk about it and someone laughs at me because my mate did that

I can promise you if you talk to a counsellor or a tutor, they shouldn't laugh. Their job is to safeguard you. The space in which you and any type of caregiver (a teacher, a therapist, a counsellor, etc.) is intentionally a safe space that is non-judgmental. The point of seeing or talking to somebody like this is that even if they do laugh at you, that's misconduct and in my experience, nobody ever laughs. Try not to let your fears override your ability to seek the help you deserve. =( You're worthy and your issues deserve respect.

I don’t know

Honestly trained professionals such as counsellors really will listen to you. They won’t laugh or judge you, I promise! My first appointment with a counsellor I told them I was anxious because I wore red instead of blue. It was so silly but they made me feel like I wasn’t being silly!

I’m just worried because they might laugh because I get depressed about minor things and they might just say be more grateful or something

There's no such thing as a minor reason for depression. I think you might have to consider that these aren't things a therapist might think of you, they're things you think of yourself. ;; Try not to project that onto a potential therapist whose job would be to coach you, and whose training enables them to understand how depression can manifest from different roots in every individual person.

- Sol.