Original post by Turning_A_CornerThis is a common trope among doctors and I think that there are several reasons why.
Chances are that the reasons that a doctor went into medicine are not necessarily the reasons keeping them in medicine (be that for better or worse). They know that what they thought they were getting into and what they ended up in are worlds apart and they probably perceive a new applicant to medicine as being hopelessly naive as they were. It's impossible to know until you know and they may just want to save you from that.
Doctors have often only done one thing in their entire working life. It's easy to look around at other people and say, oh gosh i wish I had more variety in my life. I agree with Adam Kay when he says we select our doctors far too young. Opportunities for doing other things are so limited in medicine because you wrap your entire life around it. Then it becomes difficult to leave, for various reasons, without it feeling like a massive loss of your sunk costs.
It is also just almost cultural to say this now and doctors have been saying it for decades. I think, though, this may have something to do with the types of people who found their way into medicine in the second half of the twentieth century. My parents who were both in medical careers - one a doctor - tried everything to dissuade me from doing it and succeeded, at the time. They never really explained why at the time but I came to realise later. For much of the twentieth century, medicine has often been a target career for social mobility. Looking at my father who was a doctor, who grew up below the poverty line but had the good luck to attend a decent school, medicine was presented to him as a way out. In different circumstances, he probably could have turned his hand to a number of different careers and been successful, but at the time, medicine was something that people who were above average academically and who wanted a safe pathway of upward social mobility did because it was a great leveller. Unlike law, your ability to achieve financial and professional success in medicine didn't depend so significantly on who you knew because the end goal of a consultant job was always in sight. Once people have cleared that social hurdle, they look at their own children who don't have that gap to traverse and want to offer them the options that they didn't have. I will add that in my father's case I think it was also a case of not wanting to see the child he despised do as well as he did but that's another story! However, I do agree that there are far more pathways open to people now and I often do encourage people to look elsewhere, to give themselves options and to try different things.
Obviously, people's negative experiences will shape their opinions and what they advise others to do. I think people's understanding of you and how you might do also comes into it but I would take this advice under caution. They don't know the person you're going to grow into. Interestingly, anyone who is not a member of my family and who has known me professionally or personally has always supported me doing medicine. But it can become quite difficult to imagine people becoming doctors who aren't. Doing medicine or any kind of healthcare profession puts you on the other side of a social divide that no one really acknowledges exists. There's almost a natural instinct to discourage others who just don't know and haven't experienced the things you have from crossing over, again, for better or worse. There are some things I know from working in healthcare that I really wish I didn't. When I see people preparing to come into my profession or into medicine I often find myself wanting to say, "No, no, you don't. Just stay over there. You don't want to come over here, trust me." It's part territorial, part protective, and almost no parts logical. I think it's also just a part of the game for some. People like to be able to say, "Well, don't say I didn't warn you." If you make it through the hazing ritual, most doctors would probably say, all right, lets see how we can help, then.
Plenty of other reasons I suppose. I know one doctor from school who was bullied relentlessly who makes it her mission to deter anyone bearing the slightest resemblance to the people who bullied her from entering medicine. She's occasionally been brought up on it at work for being harder on some med students and juniors and she's told me in confidence that she generally does come down harder on people who present with the slightest bullying behaviour and tries to make sure that they get a harder time getting through. So people can say "don't go into medicine" for petty reasons or territorial reasons as well.
I doubt you'll find many doctors who say things like, "oh yeah, best job in the world, come right in." It takes so much sacrifice to go into medicine and there won't be many doctors who don't regret it on some level on their worst days. You'll find the same with teachers, lawyers, bankers, vets, restauranteurs... It's almost just the way of the world.