Not sure how to help a friend, who runs out of money two weeks prior pay for months

My friend works as a picker, pays for his studio flat and takes home £1660 each month.

Weekly budget:

Rent £130 pw
Elec £25 pw
Bus £15 pw
Takeaway £25 pw
Food shop £25 pw
Council tax £28 pw
Pub Limit to £30 per week *1
His young daughter £30

£310 spent

Approx £95 a week saved

He goes to the pub twice a week and must have 9 pints each day. Shots.

The problem is, he runs out of money on the 12th pretty every month, for the last year. He gets paid on the 25th. With two weeks to go, he runs out.

I told him to go to the pub once a week, or just stay at home once in a while.

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

tell him to learn how to cook and stop getting chippies

Reply 2

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

Unless he’s asking for help, leave him be.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

I often have to give him £5 per day, so he literally pays me £40 per month. If he borrows from someone else, which I assume he does, he will have to pay them back too.

Maybe he should go to counselling.

Reply 4

Anonymous #1

Don't forget, he goes to the pub twice a week and must spend there.

Reply 5

5hyl33n

Volunteer Team, Clearing and Applications Advisor

Original post by Anonymous #1

Don't forget, he goes to the pub twice a week and must spend there.

Is he asking for help?

Reply 6

artful_lounger

Universities Forum Helper

He's not your responsibility - he needs to budget himself.

The obvious area he can fix his budget is to skip the weekly takeaways and limit pub visits/spend. £50+ a week on this adds up in a hurry and clearly is outside his means.

If you give him money you just enable him to keep doing the same thing.

Reply 7

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

Stop subsiding him and he might be more reflective.

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

I try not to give him money and tell him every month.

It's his responsibility and he surely cannot for longer run out of money with two weeks left until payday. He could easily save £100 per week.

Reply 9

StriderHort

Original post by Anonymous #1

I try not to give him money and tell him every month.
It's his responsibility and he surely cannot for longer run out of money with two weeks left until payday. He could easily save £100 per week.

Well there you go, you've done all you reasonably can.

At the end of the day it's not your lesson to learn - if he's spending £200+* on booze and £100 on junk food every month on a low wage its not a mystery why he's skint.

( *If he's going to the pub twice a week for 9-10 drinks, that's closer to £70-80 a week, way more than £30)

(edited 1 month ago)

Reply 10

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

The short answer is there’s no reason for him to change his ways because mugs are subbing him month-in, month-out.

Reply 11

Anonymous #3

Never a borrower or a lender be.

You cannot help anyone.

99% of advice given to someone to help them change has no effect so you are wasting your advice. It's his problem to deal with but only if he sees it as a problem and only if he is motivated to take action.

That the guy spends less of his take home pay to support his daughter than he does on beer tells you all you need to know about his values.

If saving or contributing more to his child becomes a higher priority than binge drinking and takeaways, that's up to him.

Reply 12

Anonymous #1

Thanks.

I'm sure he spend £60 on a Friday night and £60 on a sat night just on drinks, maybe two three shots, bombs.

Maybe going to the pub is part of his passion.

Reply 13

Anonymous #2

he sounds like an idiot and the people who are funding him are too

Reply 14

Anonymous #1

Original post by Anonymous #2

he sounds like an idiot and the people who are funding him are too

I hope he doesn't go to his pensioner relative who fmost likely funds another £50pw out of the pension every month. He must. I doubt £4 a day only for one week could do him. What about the other week to supplement his needs?

Reply 15

Anonymous #3

Really, this has nothing to do with you. It's not your role to worry about his irresponsible spending or lack of motivation to save money.

You don't need to save him from himself or try to influence him to share your beliefs about budgeting or lifestyle.

Your only decision is whether or not to lend him money when he asks.