Self-harm scars and family vacations
I'd appreciate your thoughts on this, TSR.
Character-wise, I am extremely unstable in life and therefore I have often done things which I have strongly regretted afterwards. This includes a decent amount of self-harming. A few of my friends are aware of this, but my family is not. The issue is that I am going on vacation this summer, and the house we are renting has a swimming pool. I don't see my family very often, so I would like to go. However, I obviously cannot refuse to go into the water the entire time. I know that no excuse will do, and my sister & mum are extremely untactful and will not hesitate to say something rude and humiliating if they notice. Do you have any suggestions as to what I should do? Is it possible to erase scars in the space of a couple months?
If I don't figure out an exit I will have to cancel the holiday and stay at home this summer, which would be a shame. I cannot tell them about it either, because, in hindsight, the reasons behind the self-harming are not rational enough, so it'll only make them more worried (essentially, things like someone not answering a text, or posting something incorrect on the internet - I am aware this kind of response is not healthy, but that is an entirely different problem).
Many thanks in advance.
Character-wise, I am extremely unstable in life and therefore I have often done things which I have strongly regretted afterwards. This includes a decent amount of self-harming. A few of my friends are aware of this, but my family is not. The issue is that I am going on vacation this summer, and the house we are renting has a swimming pool. I don't see my family very often, so I would like to go. However, I obviously cannot refuse to go into the water the entire time. I know that no excuse will do, and my sister & mum are extremely untactful and will not hesitate to say something rude and humiliating if they notice. Do you have any suggestions as to what I should do? Is it possible to erase scars in the space of a couple months?
If I don't figure out an exit I will have to cancel the holiday and stay at home this summer, which would be a shame. I cannot tell them about it either, because, in hindsight, the reasons behind the self-harming are not rational enough, so it'll only make them more worried (essentially, things like someone not answering a text, or posting something incorrect on the internet - I am aware this kind of response is not healthy, but that is an entirely different problem).
Many thanks in advance.
Hmm I hope you're okay OP. You can try using bio oil or palmers cocoa butter, they take time to work though.
Posted from TSR Mobile
Posted from TSR Mobile
I think you should go. **** what they think. The truth is if you've had these scars for a while it's unlikely they're ever going to disappear completely (even with using bio oil etc), are you going to spend your whole life hiding yourself from them? Trust me, it is a lot easier to tell them, face the result and get on with your life freely. It would be a shame to miss such an awesome sounding vacation because of your scars, are you going to miss the next one too? I have a lot of self harm scars in particular on my left arm, I told my parents and it is such a massive burden lifted, I can walk around when I stay with them in a tshirt, there's no more hiding all the time and it was definitely worth the awkwardness of telling them.
The solution is simple OP: 
Seriously though, as someone suggested, you can get things like Bio-Oil which will heal scars. How far up your arm do they go?
Seriously though, as someone suggested, you can get things like Bio-Oil which will heal scars. How far up your arm do they go?
Have you considered skin camouflage? http://www.changingfaces.org.uk/Skin-Camouflage
I know some people who've had great success with bio oil, so that may be worth a try. Also, bracelets may hide some of the scars, depending on where they are, and will detract attention away from the rest of your arms (assuming that's where your scars are). You could also consider wearing a shirt/t-shirt as a cover-up and whip it off just before you go into the pool. Using a slightly tinted moisturiser which is intended to give a gradual tan helps me a lot with my scars on my legs as it evens out the skintone.
You could always pretend to have hurt your arm so that it needs a bandage or splint. Obviously a full plaster cast would be hard to get hold of, but the former you can buy. It would also mean you couldn't swim.
However, if it's at all possible I would think about telling them. You will feel better to get it out in the open. I understand it is difficult though, and I don't know your full situation, so don't take my word for it, but think about it as an option.
However, if it's at all possible I would think about telling them. You will feel better to get it out in the open. I understand it is difficult though, and I don't know your full situation, so don't take my word for it, but think about it as an option.
Quick Reply
Related discussions
- RAF Medical assessment
- How to get over my ex?
- Help TW
- Faded self harm scars on a medical student
- TheDailyVent
- help! - trichotillomania (sensitive post)
- boyfriend calling me names
- Traveling
- Sending own nudes obsession
- self catering accommodation - 32 week contract
- Feeling hurt partner is away with her family without me?
- Just a question
- What wellbeing support can you get at Kingston University?
- Vacation during term time
- Would googling something make police come to your house?
- Manchester Advertising
- Cambridge Grants
- UCAS Application adhd + dyslexia
- british army self harm
- 5 careers for Working with Children, Young People & Families graduates
