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My ex logs on to Facebook 4 times a day after she broke up with me?

Hi all,

Me and my ex had each other's Facebook passwords throughout the relationship. When we broke up in June, I changed it. However we kept talking up until 2 months ago, at which point she told me she no longer had feelings for me and wanted me to move on, and she then changed her Facebook password. I was really sad and I know I should've followed the no contact rule but basically I kept messaging her and calling her. She would mostly ignore me but sometimes I would drunk text her and she would ignore, but she sometimes showed interest. I think she liked the attention I was giving her.

Anyway, I gave up on her completely and switched my password back because I'm used to it, and I didnt think she'd log on because she said she was over me. I finally stopped messaging her 2 weeks ago COMPLETELY. No texts, calls or anything. A few days ago I started realizing that some of my Facebook messages have been read. I turned on email log on notifications last Saturday and, shockingly, she logged on to my Facebook over 20 times since then (that's 20+ times in 5 days). I wondered if maybe that meant she misses me...I tried logging onto her Facebook and noticed she changed her password back to the old one a week ago (maybe she wants me to check it?)

She already checked my Facebook twice today. I'm confused because either she misses me or she just checks cuz girls are curious...and I'm scared that if I message her I'll break the no contact rule and seem desperate again. If she had some interest though, wouldn't she message me? Or is her pride maybe getting in the way? What should I do?

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She's not interested, she's nosy.
Do you not find this at all strange? I doubt she wants you to be on her Facebook and if she does then she has very odd ways of showing that she's still interested in you. But then again you sound like 2 strange peas in a pod, so yeah why not just message her? Nothing to lose and if she really does want you back she'll reply
People are just nosy. Nothing more.
Screw reading a 'signs' she's missing you. If she's not outright saying it, then forget it...concentrate on yourself instead. It's the best thing you can do. The fact is, you need to move on.
Reply 5
She's just being nosy

Change your password and move on
Well if she had moved on and had no feelings for you she certainly wouldn't do this. She must think of you everyday and to me it seems like she has feelings for you and she doesn't want you to move on with another girl at least before she does with another man. Deep down I think she does want to get back with you but something may be stopping her but it would still hurt her to see you move on. You should message other girls and see if she reacts or may be that's mean of me hehe.
Reply 7
Original post by Adammartin95
Well if she had moved on and had no feelings for you she certainly wouldn't do this. She must think of you everyday and to me it seems like she has feelings for you and she doesn't want you to move on with another girl at least before she does with another man. Deep down I think she does want to get back with you but something may be stopping her but it would still hurt her to see you move on. You should message other girls and see if she reacts or may be that's mean of me hehe.


I think she has feelings for me because it shows she thinks about me everyday, so I agree with you. But should I just let it be and let her message me? Or will she just move on if I let it be...
Original post by onehunned
I think she has feelings for me because it shows she thinks about me everyday, so I agree with you. But should I just let it be and let her message me? Or will she just move on if I let it be...


No mate She just checking your message out of curiosity and she would message you with her profile if she had a feeling which it not.
Original post by onehunned
I think she has feelings for me because it shows she thinks about me everyday, so I agree with you. But should I just let it be and let her message me? Or will she just move on if I let it be...

You can always message her, see were her feelings lie. That no contact rule worked for me though. I done the same last month continued to text her when she broke up with me and then I didn't contact her and then a month later she loves me and all that again. I think you should message her as she has had time to think and it's clear she misses you. My ex was so cold with me at the start now she is the opposite so it shows you she can of changed her mind. Just ask her how she is and see where it goes from there may be?
Reply 10
Original post by Adammartin95
You can always message her, see were her feelings lie. That no contact rule worked for me though. I done the same last month continued to text her when she broke up with me and then I didn't contact her and then a month later she loves me and all that again. I think you should message her as she has had time to think and it's clear she misses you. My ex was so cold with me at the start now she is the opposite so it shows you she can of changed her mind. Just ask her how she is and see where it goes from there may be?


Did your ex message you after a month? Or did you message her?
The thing is, I feel like I could maybe message her and get something going on again, but I don't think me messaging her first will make her stay....
I feel like if I message her shell just think I'm obsessed with her...idunno I'm confused
Original post by onehunned
Did your ex message you after a month? Or did you message her?
The thing is, I feel like I could maybe message her and get something going on again, but I don't think me messaging her first will make her stay....
I feel like if I message her shell just think I'm obsessed with her...idunno I'm confused

My ex messaged me but she won't think you're obsessed if you're only asking how she is. If you broke up without any hate etc it's only common for each other to still ask how each other is doing. All you have to do is send the question you never know. If she doesn't reply or is cold with you just say you was only checking on her and leave her be but I honestly think it sounds like she has feelings for you and she doesn't want you to move on.
Reply 12
Deep down I feel that if she really did miss me she'd tell me
She still has feelings for you. She may not want to get back together but she also doesn't want you to move on because of these feelings not at least until she has moved on I guess.
So let me get this straight....you gave your FB password to your bf because you liked her then? WOAH! Talk bout invasion of privacy! :zomg: Dude, she broke up with you! She's probably having second thoughts and out to ruin your chances with another woman. Just tell her to stop logging into your FB - she lost those priviledges when she stopped dating you! :bath:
Reply 15
Original post by Adammartin95
She still has feelings for you. She may not want to get back together but she also doesn't want you to move on because of these feelings not at least until she has moved on I guess.


Don't give certainties out like that. You have no idea. By the look of things she's being nosy and wants to see if he's said anything to any of his friends about her. I mean more in a bad way.

OP, I know you still like her so it's hard to accept reality (assuming reality is that she's simply being really nosy) but just cos someone offers the possibility of her liking you still doesn't mean it's true. You'll want to agree with those opinions because you are biased.
Reply 16
Also CAN COUPLES NOT GIVE FACEBOOK PASSWORDS TO EACH OTHER I MEAN WTF?!!

Your Facebook should be purely for you. Giving each other access is a very dangerous and damaging idea. Stupid, actually. So many of my mates, if their girlfriends went through their messages... They'd be single for the next 5 years. Fortunately their girlfriends too know it's a bad idea to share that side of things.

Just stop, it's incredibly dumb. I kinda did it at first with my ex and it'll never happen again.
Original post by pzoDe
Don't give certainties out like that. You have no idea. By the look of things she's being nosy and wants to see if he's said anything to any of his friends about her. I mean more in a bad way.

OP, I know you still like her so it's hard to accept reality (assuming reality is that she's simply being really nosy) but just cos someone offers the possibility of her liking you still doesn't mean it's true. You'll want to agree with those opinions because you are biased.


I should say 'May still have feelings for you' sorry but please explain why she is nosey to look at her ex's messages. What does it have to do with her if she has moved on. Why does she want to look to see if he's moved on or not or who he is speaking to. If she has feelings for him still, this would make sense which when two people have been truly in love they still can have some feelings for each other.
Reply 18
Original post by Adammartin95
I should say 'May still have feelings for you' sorry but please explain why she is nosey to look at her ex's messages. What does it have to do with her if she has moved on. Why does she want to look to see if he's moved on or not or who he is speaking to. If she has feelings for him still, this would make sense which when two people have been truly in love they still can have some feelings for each other.


That still does not imply certainty (which I can see you have noted). Well for example I've found cases where the ex checks the other's FB (or if they can't access it, ask a load of their friends) to see if they were slagging them off. Or to find out if they did still like them (even though they didn't) to know to confront them about tell them it's over for real. Of course, you could be correct but it's bad for the OP for you to say it's definitely the fact she has feelings for him when you could be completely wrong and make things a lot worse for his emotional side.

Also I've had first hand experience of a fairly similar situation with my ex were we both checked messages to see what each other was saying about the other when we had a massive fight/fallout/etc. It got bad and I felt crap about reading it so I decided never to do it again. It's a very dumb thing to entrust.
Original post by pzoDe
That still does not imply certainty (which I can see you have noted). Well for example I've found cases where the ex checks the other's FB (or if they can't access it, ask a load of their friends) to see if they were slagging them off. Or to find out if they did still like them (even though they didn't) to know to confront them about tell them it's over for real. Of course, you could be correct but it's bad for the OP for you to say it's definitely the fact she has feelings for him when you could be completely wrong and make things a lot worse for his emotional side.

Also I've had first hand experience of a fairly similar situation with my ex were we both checked messages to see what each other was saying about the other when we had a massive fight/fallout/etc. It got bad and I felt crap about reading it so I decided never to do it again. It's a very dumb thing to entrust.

Yes I do suppose you're right. I suppose it would be best to change the password and move on. Be interesting to see if she messages Op when she realises his password has changed.

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