Will I still get independence if I stay close to home
I've got all my offers in. Most of the unis are far away but my favorite is about an hr and a bit away on the train. I really like it but I'm worried I'll miss out on my independence, my parents are the type who will think nothing of driving up to see me every weekend if I'm that close and I so don't want that.I worry I'll have no independence or space. So should I move further away to avoid this?
Do you think they would agree to perhaps just seeing you once a month? You could always say you have course work to do and don't have time. Sorry to sound boring but they will probably be a bit worried about you so even if it is a pain regular call/text/emails whatever suits might also put their mind at rest. Remember you can also use this to your advantage as they will probably take you out for a meal and give you money when they visit!! As long as they don't visit too often of course!
Original post by cathwil7
Do you think they would agree to perhaps just seeing you once a month? You could always say you have course work to do and don't have time. Sorry to sound boring but they will probably be a bit worried about you so even if it is a pain regular call/text/emails whatever suits might also put their mind at rest. Remember you can also use this to your advantage as they will probably take you out for a meal and give you money when they visit!! As long as they don't visit too often of course!
Hadn't thought of that! Yep I guess I can use excuses. I've already promised to text everyday and call once a week.
Original post by Anna1437
I've got all my offers in. Most of the unis are far away but my favorite is about an hr and a bit away on the train. I really like it but I'm worried I'll miss out on my independence, my parents are the type who will think nothing of driving up to see me every weekend if I'm that close and I so don't want that.I worry I'll have no independence or space. So should I move further away to avoid this?
It depends on the type of parent. As time passes then they may be less adamant to check on you. I will be living at home when I go to university this September but I will still be independent. Just remember that you don't have to live a thousand miles away like some people think just to gain independence 😀
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Your parents are going to worry initially, but as they get used to not having you around the house - they'll back off a bit. I'd think it reasonable to ask your parents if they wouldn't mind coming once a month instead of every weekend. This will give you a balance of some food shopping 
and independence.
If it's an hour and a half, they probably won't bother - if it was the same city (which is what I was expecting when clicking this thread) then that'd definitely mess up your independence.
Don't be the person to go back home every weekend though, weekends are bonding days that you can use if you're not settling in and that's where a lot of people fall down.
and independence.If it's an hour and a half, they probably won't bother - if it was the same city (which is what I was expecting when clicking this thread) then that'd definitely mess up your independence.
Don't be the person to go back home every weekend though, weekends are bonding days that you can use if you're not settling in and that's where a lot of people fall down.
I went home at weekends but then I wss in preparation for a jaw operation it was fine I made lodes if frends down on Saturday night at gone back on Sunday
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Original post by Anna1437
I've got all my offers in. Most of the unis are far away but my favorite is about an hr and a bit away on the train. I really like it but I'm worried I'll miss out on my independence, my parents are the type who will think nothing of driving up to see me every weekend if I'm that close and I so don't want that.I worry I'll have no independence or space. So should I move further away to avoid this?
Go to your favourite. You'll only live to regret it if you don't.
Your parents say that now but they'll soon realise that you're happy and wont come as often. But the fact that they will come up is very nice because if you're ever feeling homesick they'll come. You'll certainly have independence and space and your parents coming up every weekend (if they actually did) would not impede on that at all. You'd still have to work and research, cook, clean etc for yourself.
No. Do not move further away.
I was in a similar situation (hometown is Leeds, university is in Newcastle, so 90mins on a train) and it didn't mess up my independence. I see it as a good thing for two reasons: I'm far away enough to get my independence, but I'm also close to home if I need to/when I do go back. As everyone else has said, choose your favorite university and go with it! It's a learning curve for them as well and they will miss you, but I doubt they'll be up to see you every weekend. As RovingFish said, agree to visit them/them to visit you every so often; but also remember to Skype/Text/Facebook/Call them will you're away too!
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