How/when do you start to enjoy driving?
Hey,
So I'm a nervous driver (nervous person generally, but think my mum's fear of driving has rubbed off on me), but now that my parents have moved to the middle of nowhere I really want to be able to drive. I've just finished uni and have 5 6-hour lessons until my test in 3 weeks. I was not and am not expecting to enjoy the lessons, but even while I was out on a hour or so practice drive with my dad today I just did not like driving and, while I felt accomplished having gotten to our destination in one piece, could not wait to get out the car. I can't tell if it's just the constant background driving anxiety or what.
My dad and a few people I know really like driving, and I was wondering if anyone has had a change of attitude towards it? I refuse to not be able to drive but this entire process is going to be really hard if I just dread getting into the car ever time.
So I'm a nervous driver (nervous person generally, but think my mum's fear of driving has rubbed off on me), but now that my parents have moved to the middle of nowhere I really want to be able to drive. I've just finished uni and have 5 6-hour lessons until my test in 3 weeks. I was not and am not expecting to enjoy the lessons, but even while I was out on a hour or so practice drive with my dad today I just did not like driving and, while I felt accomplished having gotten to our destination in one piece, could not wait to get out the car. I can't tell if it's just the constant background driving anxiety or what.
My dad and a few people I know really like driving, and I was wondering if anyone has had a change of attitude towards it? I refuse to not be able to drive but this entire process is going to be really hard if I just dread getting into the car ever time.
One of things you might be suffering from is performance anxiety. The harder you try the worse it gets (performance) and this can be related to a whole raft of things in your head space. It's real pressure and that's not enjoyable.
If you are having 6hr lessons that can be a huge amount of concentration and a big amount of head energy all used up, particularly if the scenery is coming at you thick and fast. That's not pleasant either because you can't escape.
Sometimes it's the pressure to perform (for someone else) The test is booked and you need to be driving to a specific standard? No pressure there then? and that can completely take the enjoyment away.
Fear of crashing, not coping with other road users, the list is endless.
So you are probably consciously struggling and this heaps the pressure on you. In order to relax, find somewhere quiet and work out what you are most apprehensive about then practice those skills in a quiet place. Know that you can still cancel your test and don't have to take it (that is definitely your choice) You can reschedule test appointments up to three days before the test (but that is cutting it fine) That may make you feel better (to defer the test) but unfortunately new test dates are like hen's teeth.
Your poor Dad - he's doing his best but sometimes close family members take liberties at reminding us when you failed at some skill when you were 5yrs old and then ripping the failures you drive at 18yrs - I hope you survive this episode of make me pull my hair out and test me to the limits in your relationship.
You will probably only start to enjoy driving when you can laugh and drive. Yes you can reach that day and go from darkness into the light. That sounds absurd but if you are relaxed the fine motor skills usually improve too. Aside from finding someone like Peter Kay or Sarah Millican to sit with you and make witty comments as you go? You need to build your skill confidence level to match the hardest part of town to drive in you can find but start the skill levels simple to complex. Once you have your confidence you are bombproof.
If you are having 6hr lessons that can be a huge amount of concentration and a big amount of head energy all used up, particularly if the scenery is coming at you thick and fast. That's not pleasant either because you can't escape.
Sometimes it's the pressure to perform (for someone else) The test is booked and you need to be driving to a specific standard? No pressure there then? and that can completely take the enjoyment away.
Fear of crashing, not coping with other road users, the list is endless.
So you are probably consciously struggling and this heaps the pressure on you. In order to relax, find somewhere quiet and work out what you are most apprehensive about then practice those skills in a quiet place. Know that you can still cancel your test and don't have to take it (that is definitely your choice) You can reschedule test appointments up to three days before the test (but that is cutting it fine) That may make you feel better (to defer the test) but unfortunately new test dates are like hen's teeth.
Your poor Dad - he's doing his best but sometimes close family members take liberties at reminding us when you failed at some skill when you were 5yrs old and then ripping the failures you drive at 18yrs - I hope you survive this episode of make me pull my hair out and test me to the limits in your relationship.
You will probably only start to enjoy driving when you can laugh and drive. Yes you can reach that day and go from darkness into the light. That sounds absurd but if you are relaxed the fine motor skills usually improve too. Aside from finding someone like Peter Kay or Sarah Millican to sit with you and make witty comments as you go? You need to build your skill confidence level to match the hardest part of town to drive in you can find but start the skill levels simple to complex. Once you have your confidence you are bombproof.
Original post by Muttly
One of things you might be suffering from is performance anxiety. The harder you try the worse it gets (performance) and this can be related to a whole raft of things in your head space. It's real pressure and that's not enjoyable.
If you are having 6hr lessons that can be a huge amount of concentration and a big amount of head energy all used up, particularly if the scenery is coming at you thick and fast. That's not pleasant either because you can't escape.
Sometimes it's the pressure to perform (for someone else) The test is booked and you need to be driving to a specific standard? No pressure there then? and that can completely take the enjoyment away.
Fear of crashing, not coping with other road users, the list is endless.
So you are probably consciously struggling and this heaps the pressure on you. In order to relax, find somewhere quiet and work out what you are most apprehensive about then practice those skills in a quiet place. Know that you can still cancel your test and don't have to take it (that is definitely your choice) You can reschedule test appointments up to three days before the test (but that is cutting it fine) That may make you feel better (to defer the test) but unfortunately new test dates are like hen's teeth.
Your poor Dad - he's doing his best but sometimes close family members take liberties at reminding us when you failed at some skill when you were 5yrs old and then ripping the failures you drive at 18yrs - I hope you survive this episode of make me pull my hair out and test me to the limits in your relationship.
You will probably only start to enjoy driving when you can laugh and drive. Yes you can reach that day and go from darkness into the light. That sounds absurd but if you are relaxed the fine motor skills usually improve too. Aside from finding someone like Peter Kay or Sarah Millican to sit with you and make witty comments as you go? You need to build your skill confidence level to match the hardest part of town to drive in you can find but start the skill levels simple to complex. Once you have your confidence you are bombproof.
If you are having 6hr lessons that can be a huge amount of concentration and a big amount of head energy all used up, particularly if the scenery is coming at you thick and fast. That's not pleasant either because you can't escape.
Sometimes it's the pressure to perform (for someone else) The test is booked and you need to be driving to a specific standard? No pressure there then? and that can completely take the enjoyment away.
Fear of crashing, not coping with other road users, the list is endless.
So you are probably consciously struggling and this heaps the pressure on you. In order to relax, find somewhere quiet and work out what you are most apprehensive about then practice those skills in a quiet place. Know that you can still cancel your test and don't have to take it (that is definitely your choice) You can reschedule test appointments up to three days before the test (but that is cutting it fine) That may make you feel better (to defer the test) but unfortunately new test dates are like hen's teeth.
Your poor Dad - he's doing his best but sometimes close family members take liberties at reminding us when you failed at some skill when you were 5yrs old and then ripping the failures you drive at 18yrs - I hope you survive this episode of make me pull my hair out and test me to the limits in your relationship.
You will probably only start to enjoy driving when you can laugh and drive. Yes you can reach that day and go from darkness into the light. That sounds absurd but if you are relaxed the fine motor skills usually improve too. Aside from finding someone like Peter Kay or Sarah Millican to sit with you and make witty comments as you go? You need to build your skill confidence level to match the hardest part of town to drive in you can find but start the skill levels simple to complex. Once you have your confidence you are bombproof.
Wow yeah I guess I hadn't really thought about the pressure aspect, thanks! Yeah I'd love to be able to delay the test but seeing as I had to book this as a cancelled slot months ago, I'd hate to think when the next slot would be! But I think I'll start thinking about the test as a mock test, and if I fail it isn't the end of the world.
Thanks for your perspective!
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