What to say?
A new friend I’ve only met once has invited me to go clubbing with her and her friends. I’ve never been clubbing before, I’m in my 20s and I never went clubbing whilst I was at uni, that kind of atmosphere just doesn’t appeal to me, so I’m a bit hesitant to go, but idk what to say. I don’t want to seem like I don’t want to hang out with her. Id honestly be happy to have lunch somewhere or do something really chill, but clubbing is a bit out of my comfort zone. I also don’t want to seem lame because I don’t know her well at all so I don’t know if she’d be respectful of the fact I’m not interested in clubbing.
If it's not something you're into, it's totally fine and if she's a respectful and good friend, then she'll accept that it's not your thing and will perhaps plan something else for you both. Don't be afraid to speak up on something you don't want to do if it makes you uncomfortable.
Original post by Anonymous
A new friend I’ve only met once has invited me to go clubbing with her and her friends. I’ve never been clubbing before, I’m in my 20s and I never went clubbing whilst I was at uni, that kind of atmosphere just doesn’t appeal to me, so I’m a bit hesitant to go, but idk what to say. I don’t want to seem like I don’t want to hang out with her. Id honestly be happy to have lunch somewhere or do something really chill, but clubbing is a bit out of my comfort zone. I also don’t want to seem lame because I don’t know her well at all so I don’t know if she’d be respectful of the fact I’m not interested in clubbing.
You are not interested and dont feel comfy with it so say no. There is 0 benefit from going clubbing anyways, its short term gain long term pain. Its a bad habit, a bad hobby and people who indulge in it have a messy life style. Dont ruin yourself over trying to being respectful.
Also this may be a stretch or rude, and I apologise ahead of time for it if it is however if a person who you have met once invites you to clubbing it says a lot about them.
1) They seen clubbing as something fun : their hobbies already doesnt align with yours.
2) This is something personal to myself may not apply to others however I see those who go clubbing as rather irresponsible and shallow as a person. Their amusement comes from drinking, dancing to flashing lights whilst their judgement is clouded and theres loud music in the background.
3) Clubbing is usually... ahh I am too tired why am I ranting about this. Anyway you get the point.
Long story short, say no
Original post by Anonymous
A new friend I’ve only met once has invited me to go clubbing with her and her friends. I’ve never been clubbing before, I’m in my 20s and I never went clubbing whilst I was at uni, that kind of atmosphere just doesn’t appeal to me, so I’m a bit hesitant to go, but idk what to say. I don’t want to seem like I don’t want to hang out with her. Id honestly be happy to have lunch somewhere or do something really chill, but clubbing is a bit out of my comfort zone. I also don’t want to seem lame because I don’t know her well at all so I don’t know if she’d be respectful of the fact I’m not interested in clubbing.
The whole "I don't want to seem lame because I don't know her well at all..." is just insane to me. Why make a mountain out of a mole hill? Why care so much about the way someone you barely know sees you, when you are not even doing anything wrong in the first place?
Go ahead and tell her that you are not a clubber - I am, but many of my friends aren't - and if she's worthy of becoming a friend of yours, she'll understand, take note of that, and invite you to functions or places that are compatible with your nature. If she isn't understanding when you decline the clubbing invitation, then this is the perfect time to nip the relationship in the bud. Good riddance!!!!
Original post by osasman
The whole "I don't want to seem lame because I don't know her well at all..." is just insane to me. Why make a mountain out of a mole hill? Why care so much about the way someone you barely know sees you, when you are not even doing anything wrong in the first place?
Go ahead and tell her that you are not a clubber - I am, but many of my friends aren't - and if she's worthy of becoming a friend of yours, she'll understand, take note of that, and invite you to functions or places that are compatible with your nature. If she isn't understanding when you decline the clubbing invitation, then this is the perfect time to nip the relationship in the bud. Good riddance!!!!
Go ahead and tell her that you are not a clubber - I am, but many of my friends aren't - and if she's worthy of becoming a friend of yours, she'll understand, take note of that, and invite you to functions or places that are compatible with your nature. If she isn't understanding when you decline the clubbing invitation, then this is the perfect time to nip the relationship in the bud. Good riddance!!!!
Well said!!
(edited 1 year ago)
Original post by Anonymous
A new friend I’ve only met once has invited me to go clubbing with her and her friends. I’ve never been clubbing before, I’m in my 20s and I never went clubbing whilst I was at uni, that kind of atmosphere just doesn’t appeal to me, so I’m a bit hesitant to go, but idk what to say. I don’t want to seem like I don’t want to hang out with her. Id honestly be happy to have lunch somewhere or do something really chill, but clubbing is a bit out of my comfort zone. I also don’t want to seem lame because I don’t know her well at all so I don’t know if she’d be respectful of the fact I’m not interested in clubbing.
stop being such a wuss and just go. It's one night and really not that deep
It's better not to go than go and then it becomes apparent that you aren't enjoying yourself. The atmosphere of the group will flatten and they will blame you for ending the night early. Trust me, I've been there.
A good friend should accept that you enjoy different things, not everyone likes being in a cramped sweaty room dancing awkwardly.
A good friend should accept that you enjoy different things, not everyone likes being in a cramped sweaty room dancing awkwardly.
Original post by Anonymous
It's better not to go than go and then it becomes apparent that you aren't enjoying yourself. The atmosphere of the group will flatten and they will blame you for ending the night early. Trust me, I've been there.
A good friend should accept that you enjoy different things, not everyone likes being in a cramped sweaty room dancing awkwardly.
A good friend should accept that you enjoy different things, not everyone likes being in a cramped sweaty room dancing awkwardly.
Exactly. Pooping a party is a far worse crime than not attending at all.
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