My Crush is Perfect except for this one thing.
I'm 19 and a female in 2 year of university. I have had a crush on this boy for a little while now. He is honestly amazing. The sweetest and most gentle person I have met. he is tall, handsome and very funny. he is very caring and generally about as perfect as a man could get, but i was talking with him the other day for a few hours and he gave his view about bodycounts.
This boy is very honest, not in a mean way but he doesn't hesitate to tell his actual opinion. he isn't bigoted at all tho, as he usually understands the other view of the subject.
But anyway, we began to talk about what we find attractive in partners. He said a bunch of things about hobbies, fitness etc but then he said he would
"only date a girl with a very low body count, below 3"
This kinda shattered my heart as my body count is 11, and I'm pretty sure he knows this. do you guys think i still have a chance?
for context, this guy is a virgin. hes extremely attractive but he chooses to stay a virgin until "he finds someone he loves"
This boy is very honest, not in a mean way but he doesn't hesitate to tell his actual opinion. he isn't bigoted at all tho, as he usually understands the other view of the subject.
But anyway, we began to talk about what we find attractive in partners. He said a bunch of things about hobbies, fitness etc but then he said he would
"only date a girl with a very low body count, below 3"
This kinda shattered my heart as my body count is 11, and I'm pretty sure he knows this. do you guys think i still have a chance?
for context, this guy is a virgin. hes extremely attractive but he chooses to stay a virgin until "he finds someone he loves"
Scroll to see replies
Original post by Anonymous
I'm 19 and a female in 2 year of university. I have had a crush on this boy for a little while now. He is honestly amazing. The sweetest and most gentle person I have met. he is tall, handsome and very funny. he is very caring and generally about as perfect as a man could get, but i was talking with him the other day for a few hours and he gave his view about bodycounts.
This boy is very honest, not in a mean way but he doesn't hesitate to tell his actual opinion. he isn't bigoted at all tho, as he usually understands the other view of the subject.
But anyway, we began to talk about what we find attractive in partners. He said a bunch of things about hobbies, fitness etc but then he said he would
"only date a girl with a very low body count, below 3"
This kinda shattered my heart as my body count is 11, and I'm pretty sure he knows this. do you guys think i still have a chance?
for context, this guy is a virgin. hes extremely attractive but he chooses to stay a virgin until "he finds someone he loves"
This boy is very honest, not in a mean way but he doesn't hesitate to tell his actual opinion. he isn't bigoted at all tho, as he usually understands the other view of the subject.
But anyway, we began to talk about what we find attractive in partners. He said a bunch of things about hobbies, fitness etc but then he said he would
"only date a girl with a very low body count, below 3"
This kinda shattered my heart as my body count is 11, and I'm pretty sure he knows this. do you guys think i still have a chance?
for context, this guy is a virgin. hes extremely attractive but he chooses to stay a virgin until "he finds someone he loves"
Your title is funny, after one read the thread.
you say he is imperfect on one thing, that one thing being that he does not want a promiscuous woman.
So you believe him having a preference is bad?
do you consider yourself bad for having preferences?
Do you consider women who would not want to have anything to do with virgin men a bad thing? If so do you call those women out when they express their preferences?
he has the right to have a rule that dishes out any woman who has had more than 3 partners. It is his right. The same way a woman has the right to have a rule that dishes out men with small penis for instance.
Soyou feel disappointed because his preference vet you out as a potential partner to him? Like you think he is shallow for having such rule?
do you realise that your behaviour is not different from the so called incels who get mad about women preferences?
you said he is attractive but still a virgin because he is waiting for the one. This shows that he has some moral values (maybe religious values) and wants to stick to it.
You have to accept that based on his views, you are not compatible with him.
you can try to still be with him. But tell him the truth when he will ask you about number of past sexual partners. He has the right to know the truth.
of course if you want to build a relationship based on lies, then lie to him when he will ask.
I believe you do still have a chance i totally get that it hurt u the fact he said that but if he likes u trust me this body count thing could totally be avoided and this is coming from a virgin that wouldnt want anyone but a virgin yet ive met a guy that has a body count of 5 and i was able to let that one thing go because it doesn’t really mean anth uk wats jn the past is in the past.
I suspect he's afraid of appearing inadequate
Original post by Anonymous
I'm 19 and a female in 2 year of university. I have had a crush on this boy for a little while now. He is honestly amazing. The sweetest and most gentle person I have met. he is tall, handsome and very funny. he is very caring and generally about as perfect as a man could get, but i was talking with him the other day for a few hours and he gave his view about bodycounts.
This boy is very honest, not in a mean way but he doesn't hesitate to tell his actual opinion. he isn't bigoted at all tho, as he usually understands the other view of the subject.
But anyway, we began to talk about what we find attractive in partners. He said a bunch of things about hobbies, fitness etc but then he said he would
"only date a girl with a very low body count, below 3"
This kinda shattered my heart as my body count is 11, and I'm pretty sure he knows this. do you guys think i still have a chance?
for context, this guy is a virgin. hes extremely attractive but he chooses to stay a virgin until "he finds someone he loves"
This boy is very honest, not in a mean way but he doesn't hesitate to tell his actual opinion. he isn't bigoted at all tho, as he usually understands the other view of the subject.
But anyway, we began to talk about what we find attractive in partners. He said a bunch of things about hobbies, fitness etc but then he said he would
"only date a girl with a very low body count, below 3"
This kinda shattered my heart as my body count is 11, and I'm pretty sure he knows this. do you guys think i still have a chance?
for context, this guy is a virgin. hes extremely attractive but he chooses to stay a virgin until "he finds someone he loves"
That man is a clown. Men must never reveal such real views. They must keep their mouths shut.
As for the bodycount point, he is wrong. You can date any woman with whatever amount of bodies but you only wife women with low bodycounts. What constitutes low is up to the person. Some lads would wife a woman with 300 bodies and others wont.
Original post by Rxxmemo
I believe you do still have a chance i totally get that it hurt u the fact he said that but if he likes u trust me this body count thing could totally be avoided and this is coming from a virgin that wouldnt want anyone but a virgin yet ive met a guy that has a body count of 5 and i was able to let that one thing go because it doesn’t really mean anth uk wats jn the past is in the past.
Female bodycounts and male bodycounts are different imho. Some women value experience and some men do.
To me, i think if a man finds out that his missus has had a train ran on her, he would likely end the relationship. However, if it was the other way round, she probably wont.
Original post by Wired_1800
That man is a clown. Men must never reveal such real views. They must keep their mouths shut.
As for the bodycount point, he is wrong. You can date any woman with whatever amount of bodies but you only wife women with low bodycounts. What constitutes low is up to the person. Some lads would wife a woman with 300 bodies and others wont.
As for the bodycount point, he is wrong. You can date any woman with whatever amount of bodies but you only wife women with low bodycounts. What constitutes low is up to the person. Some lads would wife a woman with 300 bodies and others wont.
Why is his preference wrong? He can decide who he dates and marries.
Original post by Surnia
Why is his preference wrong? He can decide who he dates and marries.
You are right. It is his decision.
to me, best to keep his mouth shut.
Original post by Ackhnologia
Your title is funny, after one read the thread.
I did think...
'My Crush is Perfect except for this one thing.'
Aye, he hates clickbate.
Original post by Wired_1800
You are right. It is his decision.
to me, best to keep his mouth shut.
to me, best to keep his mouth shut.
Honesty and communication are key in a relationship, so he is right to express his views.
I'm being glib, but this is the sort of thing virgins often come out wit. They're in a very different place from someone with a lot of sexual experience, often to the point where they can't even comprehend it.
Original post by Surnia
Honesty and communication are key in a relationship, so he is right to express his views.
With the wrong girl, yes.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm 19 and a female in 2 year of university. I have had a crush on this boy for a little while now. He is honestly amazing. The sweetest and most gentle person I have met. he is tall, handsome and very funny. he is very caring and generally about as perfect as a man could get, but i was talking with him the other day for a few hours and he gave his view about bodycounts.
This boy is very honest, not in a mean way but he doesn't hesitate to tell his actual opinion. he isn't bigoted at all tho, as he usually understands the other view of the subject.
But anyway, we began to talk about what we find attractive in partners. He said a bunch of things about hobbies, fitness etc but then he said he would
"only date a girl with a very low body count, below 3"
This kinda shattered my heart as my body count is 11, and I'm pretty sure he knows this. do you guys think i still have a chance?
for context, this guy is a virgin. hes extremely attractive but he chooses to stay a virgin until "he finds someone he loves"
This boy is very honest, not in a mean way but he doesn't hesitate to tell his actual opinion. he isn't bigoted at all tho, as he usually understands the other view of the subject.
But anyway, we began to talk about what we find attractive in partners. He said a bunch of things about hobbies, fitness etc but then he said he would
"only date a girl with a very low body count, below 3"
This kinda shattered my heart as my body count is 11, and I'm pretty sure he knows this. do you guys think i still have a chance?
for context, this guy is a virgin. hes extremely attractive but he chooses to stay a virgin until "he finds someone he loves"
like some others have said, this is his preference and his own opinion; he wants to lose his virginity when he's found the right person i suppose, and he would want his partner to have little experience too by the sounds of it. if he chooses that he would prefer that kind of girl then by that logic he wouldn't want to date you, but i'd just say if you're truly interested in him then just talk to him about it.
Original post by Wired_1800
Female bodycounts and male bodycounts are different imho. Some women value experience and some men do.
To me, i think if a man finds out that his missus has had a train ran on her, he would likely end the relationship. However, if it was the other way round, she probably wont.
To me, i think if a man finds out that his missus has had a train ran on her, he would likely end the relationship. However, if it was the other way round, she probably wont.
I know a lot of women will see your comment and think you are a misogynist.
while you just wrote the truth.
i would not say all men feel that way about a woman who has multiple sexual partners, but a lot do.
while women, on the other hand, are generally disgusted by virgin men or men with low experience level, wether relationship or sex. "Like, you are telling me no woman ever found you attractive to have sex with you or be in a relationship? Or so socially inept thatyou cannot attract any woman." Is how a lot of women think when they talk with a virgin man.
It is something men experience, see in REAL LIFE when interacting with women. But, somehow, women donot believe men on that.
I think this kind of thread, is the perfect example that shows how a lot of women are hypocrites and promote double standards, without even realising, when it comes to preferences.
A lot of women believe, men who have a lot of sexual partners themselves, are hypocrites if they decide to only be with a virgin or low sexual partners woman, when those men want to start a long-term relationship. Because, how dare they,when themselves, they had a lot of sexual partners.
but now lets see; following that logic:
when an incel who is short, and get rejected by a woman the same height as him, because she does not like that he is the same height as her and want someone taller than her, should not that woman be considered a massive hypocrite? how dare she reject a man the same height as her and want someone taller?
Well this how women feel when they attack promiscuous men who only want virgin women for long-term relationships.
plus height is not something one can have control over. But one can control their sexual urges. So which one should actually be considered shallow as preference?
Men or women, we all have the right to our preferences.
There is nothing wrong with a woman having multiple sexual partners. But be ready to accept that, even promiscuous men might avoid you when it comes to relationship.
a man not wanting a promiscuous woman, is not insecure or not afraid to feel inadequate like some users on here said.
is a short woman insecure and is feeling inadequate when she only want taller men?
no one is entitled or owned nothing.
Original post by Ackhnologia
I know a lot of women will see your comment and think you are a misogynist.
while you just wrote the truth.
i would not say all men feel that way about a woman who has multiple sexual partners, but a lot do.
while women, on the other hand, are generally disgusted by virgin men or men with low experience level, wether relationship or sex. "Like, you are telling me no woman ever found you attractive to have sex with you or be in a relationship? Or so socially inept thatyou cannot attract any woman." Is how a lot of women think when they talk with a virgin man.
It is something men experience, see in REAL LIFE when interacting with women. But, somehow, women donot believe men on that.
I think this kind of thread, is the perfect example that shows how a lot of women are hypocrites and promote double standards, without even realising, when it comes to preferences.
A lot of women believe, men who have a lot of sexual partners themselves, are hypocrites if they decide to only be with a virgin or low sexual partners woman, when those men want to start a long-term relationship. Because, how dare they,when themselves, they had a lot of sexual partners.
but now lets see; following that logic:
when an incel who is short, and get rejected by a woman the same height as him, because she does not like that he is the same height as her and want someone taller than her, should not that woman be considered a massive hypocrite? how dare she reject a man the same height as her and want someone taller?
Well this how women feel when they attack promiscuous men who only want virgin women for long-term relationships.
plus height is not something one can have control over. But one can control their sexual urges. So which one should actually be considered shallow as preference?
Men or women, we all have the right to our preferences.
There is nothing wrong with a woman having multiple sexual partners. But be ready to accept that, even promiscuous men might avoid you when it comes to relationship.
a man not wanting a promiscuous woman, is not insecure or not afraid to feel inadequate like some users on here said.
is a short woman insecure and is feeling inadequate when she only want taller men?
no one is entitled or owned nothing.
while you just wrote the truth.
i would not say all men feel that way about a woman who has multiple sexual partners, but a lot do.
while women, on the other hand, are generally disgusted by virgin men or men with low experience level, wether relationship or sex. "Like, you are telling me no woman ever found you attractive to have sex with you or be in a relationship? Or so socially inept thatyou cannot attract any woman." Is how a lot of women think when they talk with a virgin man.
It is something men experience, see in REAL LIFE when interacting with women. But, somehow, women donot believe men on that.
I think this kind of thread, is the perfect example that shows how a lot of women are hypocrites and promote double standards, without even realising, when it comes to preferences.
A lot of women believe, men who have a lot of sexual partners themselves, are hypocrites if they decide to only be with a virgin or low sexual partners woman, when those men want to start a long-term relationship. Because, how dare they,when themselves, they had a lot of sexual partners.
but now lets see; following that logic:
when an incel who is short, and get rejected by a woman the same height as him, because she does not like that he is the same height as her and want someone taller than her, should not that woman be considered a massive hypocrite? how dare she reject a man the same height as her and want someone taller?
Well this how women feel when they attack promiscuous men who only want virgin women for long-term relationships.
plus height is not something one can have control over. But one can control their sexual urges. So which one should actually be considered shallow as preference?
Men or women, we all have the right to our preferences.
There is nothing wrong with a woman having multiple sexual partners. But be ready to accept that, even promiscuous men might avoid you when it comes to relationship.
a man not wanting a promiscuous woman, is not insecure or not afraid to feel inadequate like some users on here said.
is a short woman insecure and is feeling inadequate when she only want taller men?
no one is entitled or owned nothing.
Yes, I have been accused of being a misogynist when I have stated the truth. I also mentioned this IRL to a group and one female said that her bf was not insecure of her body count. So I challenged her to tell him. She told him and he dumped her. She then called him insecure and I laughed hard.
The big problem with the issue with female bodycount is that females (in general) would fight hard to not be part of the “chosen” group. So disqualifying them based on the number of their previous sexual partners is a no go hence why they would lie to sell the illusion of some level of purity.
This is similar to men and what values are for us. Many males would shame a female who wants a tall, good looking and rich lad because many males don't qualify? So we would rather than they picked an attribute that would put them in the running as well.
One contradiction that I see when i listen to relationship discourse is the disconnect between female agency and accountability. Several women demand that they have agency to make their own choices but then run away from the consequences of those actions by shaming people who choose to use it against them.
I think only females are allowed preferences or standards, for men, their standards are regarded as discrimination.
Original post by Wired_1800
Yes, I have been accused of being a misogynist when I have stated the truth. I also mentioned this IRL to a group and one female said that her bf was not insecure of her body count. So I challenged her to tell him. She told him and he dumped her. She then called him insecure and I laughed hard.
The big problem with the issue with female bodycount is that females (in general) would fight hard to not be part of the “chosen” group. So disqualifying them based on the number of their previous sexual partners is a no go hence why they would lie to sell the illusion of some level of purity.
This is similar to men and what values are for us. Many males would shame a female who wants a tall, good looking and rich lad because many males don't qualify? So we would rather than they picked an attribute that would put them in the running as well.
One contradiction that I see when i listen to relationship discourse is the disconnect between female agency and accountability. Several women demand that they have agency to make their own choices but then run away from the consequences of those actions by shaming people who choose to use it against them.
I think only females are allowed preferences or standards, for men, their standards are regarded as discrimination.
The big problem with the issue with female bodycount is that females (in general) would fight hard to not be part of the “chosen” group. So disqualifying them based on the number of their previous sexual partners is a no go hence why they would lie to sell the illusion of some level of purity.
This is similar to men and what values are for us. Many males would shame a female who wants a tall, good looking and rich lad because many males don't qualify? So we would rather than they picked an attribute that would put them in the running as well.
One contradiction that I see when i listen to relationship discourse is the disconnect between female agency and accountability. Several women demand that they have agency to make their own choices but then run away from the consequences of those actions by shaming people who choose to use it against them.
I think only females are allowed preferences or standards, for men, their standards are regarded as discrimination.
lmao i wonder how she could be so confident about her boyfriend not being "insecure" without even telling him before.
lmao that is crazy. And now that he dumped her, all of sudden, he is "insecure".
And it is definitely a bad thing to lie about it. People can do whatever they want, but one has to be ready and acceptthat decisions have consequences.
Yes you are right about that. A lot of men would rather shame a woman for those preferences. I always disagree with that. Men or women we all have the rights to have standards. Wether they are realistic or not.
Yes. Human beings as a whole would rather have their cake and eat it too.
But yes. This topic of sexual partners is always subject to a lot of double standards by a lot of women.
what is funny is that, a lot of insults are used against any man who dares toget mad about women for their preferences. The famous one being the word incel.
But, i do notknow if there is a word used against women who get mad at men preferences. If someone knows about it, feel free to tell me.
It definitely feels like men are criticised a whole lot for their preferences.
i know women get criticised for their preferences, but this much less accepted by society as whole, than when it comes to men.
Original post by Ackhnologia
lmao i wonder how she could be so confident about her boyfriend not being "insecure" without even telling him before.
lmao that is crazy. And now that he dumped her, all of sudden, he is "insecure".
And it is definitely a bad thing to lie about it. People can do whatever they want, but one has to be ready and acceptthat decisions have consequences.
Yes you are right about that. A lot of men would rather shame a woman for those preferences. I always disagree with that. Men or women we all have the rights to have standards. Wether they are realistic or not.
Yes. Human beings as a whole would rather have their cake and eat it too.
But yes. This topic of sexual partners is always subject to a lot of double standards by a lot of women.
what is funny is that, a lot of insults are used against any man who dares toget mad about women for their preferences. The famous one being the word incel.
But, i do notknow if there is a word used against women who get mad at men preferences. If someone knows about it, feel free to tell me.
It definitely feels like men are criticised a whole lot for their preferences.
i know women get criticised for their preferences, but this much less accepted by society as whole, than when it comes to men.
lmao that is crazy. And now that he dumped her, all of sudden, he is "insecure".
And it is definitely a bad thing to lie about it. People can do whatever they want, but one has to be ready and acceptthat decisions have consequences.
Yes you are right about that. A lot of men would rather shame a woman for those preferences. I always disagree with that. Men or women we all have the rights to have standards. Wether they are realistic or not.
Yes. Human beings as a whole would rather have their cake and eat it too.
But yes. This topic of sexual partners is always subject to a lot of double standards by a lot of women.
what is funny is that, a lot of insults are used against any man who dares toget mad about women for their preferences. The famous one being the word incel.
But, i do notknow if there is a word used against women who get mad at men preferences. If someone knows about it, feel free to tell me.
It definitely feels like men are criticised a whole lot for their preferences.
i know women get criticised for their preferences, but this much less accepted by society as whole, than when it comes to men.
It is important, to me, for both groups seek to understand what the other party wants in a relationship.
Why do you want a chance with a lad who would think badly of you because of your body count? I'd personally see that as a sign to steer clear.
Original post by Wired_1800
It is important, to me, for both groups seek to understand what the other party wants in a relationship.
sure
agreed
i think if you respect him, and he's not interested in you because of the body count, you should just stay friends. if he's not interested, there's no point getting your hopes up
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