How to deal with a abusive father?

So, this has been going on for basically since i hit puberty (around 12) up until now (almost 17). It’s gotten unbearable, and i’ve grown to reallllyyy dislike my father at times. It’s been bad, like, physically abusive bad, and that left me obviously with some major trauma, but lately his actions and just the way he functions in our house has really terribly and obviously affected every member of my family. I mean, to start, his personality is extremely narcissistic, he approaches almost every conversation with a hugely stand-offish tone that almost always ends in a fight, then screams at us when no one therefore wants to have a conversation with him, he genuinely acts like he hates my brother and i, which obviously hurts a lot, i’ve never heard him apologise for anything, it seems he genuinely can’t talk to anyone without saying at least, like, 5 passively aggressive things for absolutely no reason, and the list goes on. it gets so tiring being in the same house as him. i can’t be in the same room as him, i think because of the trauma from the physical abuse, and i seriously don’t think he’s ever had a real conversation with me. the most we’ve made is small talk my entire life, and even then he makes it obvious that it’s a chore for him, and we’ve never gone deeper than that. and i’ve tried, i really have, but he makes it impossible, he’s rude and insulting, and for that reason i’ve obviously grown pretty close to my mum instead. of course, he uses our strong relationship against us and constantly accuses everyone in the house of hating him, which always comes off as very guilt-trippy. also, he demands respect, (which i completely understand by the way and try my hardest to give it) but seriously does not respect a single member of this household, especially me. he wants this kind of victorian father-daughter power dynamic that i just can’t get behind, like i will completely respect you but it’s so hard when you treat me like i’m genuinely an inferior species. there’s a lot more, but basically for around 4 years it’s been like, if dad doesn’t pick a fight when he talks to you, you’re lucky.
my mum has recognised this behaviour as abusive for a couple of years now i think, it’s even harder for her and i feel terrible. no one should have to live like that and see constant conflict every day. i hate it too. my mum and i have agreed for ages that my dad needs some sort of anger management therapy but he refuses to go to therapy because, in his culture, he says it’s a sign of weakness. it’s so selfish. everyone in the house is so drained from his abuse and he refuses to change because its ‘his house’. i mean, he’s expressed multiple times that he wouldn’t mind if i was kicked out to live alone in the streets, and that i’m a disrespectful little *****. but yes, i just really want to know what i can do to stop him making me dread
home every day.