Me ovethinking about girl i like

Sorry if this is all mumble jumbled. It may be a little weird time wise but its why I’m trying to give dates 😊

and sorry for typos, gotta sleep soon for work ;(

I've (24m) known this girl (ik this gonna sound bad but i think 23, cant remember but she around 23ish) since 2021 from an old job I used to work at. I left the job towards the end of 2021, and we didn't really meet up (maybe 1-3 times) but we would text/snap/ be in contact a decent amount.

Since January I've started to catch feelings for her, and we recently met up last Saturday (15th) after she sent me a text saying she had been thinking about me and wanted to meet up before she goes to university out of London, and we went on a date. It was rly rly rly rly fun. We didn't rly plan much other than the cinema and didn’t think about after the movie so it kind of got a little bit dry afterwards as I couldn’t relax and talk normally, but unfortunately and fortunately her cat came in rescue and got in an accident (he is okay, her brother got worried cos he was acting weird) and caused the date to stop, which saved us from the dryness it had. (I don’t mean this in a bad way it’s just I was worried she was getting bored and tried to make small talk but kept fumbling).

Me and her texted after and she said she had fun, complimented me, and said she wanted to meet up again before I go holiday next week (31st). A few days ago (18th), I asked if she free she going to friends she said and won’t be back till 1-week later Friday (28th). I then asked her about 2 days ago what she want to do (maybe 22nd can’t remember exactly) and she saying she going to stay another week. It kind of felt like she is avoiding me but in the 2 I’ve known her she has never done this or talked about doing stuff like this before.

Things that have happened that make me think she does like me though:
- She has drunk texted me saying she likes me etc, but this was during 2022.
- She wants to make more plans even after the date and generally during 2022 and 2023 we both have been saying to hangout but never had aligned work schedules.
- My female friends at work have read some snippets of my chats with her and do say somethings up.
But idk im dense asf, whats a women?

I want to see how she feels but I don’t know how to go around this. Is she ignoring me? Does she hate me? Is she just scared or thinking? Like I don’t know and I’m overthinking like crazy to the point where I woke up at 2 am and just walked around thinking how to ask her about this stuff.

Part of me just wants me to say how I feel but I don’t want to ruin the friendship in case she rly does just see me as a friend, my friend I should try tell her but im scared.

Any advice with this is good advice, so thank you in advance.

(edited 9 months ago)

Reply 1

IDKwhatUsername9

15

You like her and your feelings matter, she wants to meet you, she actively chooses to talk to YOU. You are worth her time and she obviously enjoys talking to you. You'll regret it if you never ask her out, even if she may say no its better to know that for sure than to be contemplating about whether or not you missed out on a relationship for the rest of your life. Do what you want to do. She makes you happy. Maybe wait until she asks you to meet again since you've asked her twice in a row now. Anyway we are on a big rock in the middle of space what does it matter if she says no, theres always someone better for you

Reply 2

RXD_Sami

OP

2

Original post by IDKwhatUsername9

Anyway we are on a big rock in the middle of space what does it matter if she says no, theres always someone better for you

bro I ******* love this.

however, in all seriousness, I think imma wait a bit (maybe mid-September as she going to university) but drop small hints, and see her more, and eventually ill give an update which I hope will be a good one :smile:

thank u for ur reply <3

(edited 9 months ago)

Reply 3

loveman12

1

It's normal to think about someone you like, but it's important to find the right balance between thinking about them and obsessing over them. Overthinking can lead to unnecessary stress and anxiety, and it may even negatively impact your interactions with the person you like.

If you find yourself constantly thinking about this girl, it may be helpful to take a step back and focus on other aspects of your life. Engage in activities that you enjoy, spend time with friends and family, and take care of your physical and mental health. This can help you gain perspective and reduce the intensity of your thoughts and emotions.

Additionally, it may be helpful to focus on building a genuine and authentic connection with this girl, rather than getting caught up in your own thoughts and expectations. Try to be present and engaged when you're around her, and focus on getting to know her as a person. Be open and honest about your feelings and intentions, and be willing to listen and communicate openly with her.

Remember, it's important to take care of yourself and prioritize your own well-being, even in matters of the heart. Try to maintain a healthy balance between your thoughts and emotions, and don't let overthinking consume you.

Reply 4

RXD_Sami

OP

2

Original post by loveman12

It's normal to think about someone you like, but it's important to find the right balance between thinking about them and obsessing over them. Overthinking can lead to unnecessary stress and anxiety, and it may even negatively impact your interactions with the person you like.

If you find yourself constantly thinking about this girl, it may be helpful to take a step back and focus on other aspects of your life. Engage in activities that you enjoy, spend time with friends and family, and take care of your physical and mental health. This can help you gain perspective and reduce the intensity of your thoughts and emotions.

Additionally, it may be helpful to focus on building a genuine and authentic connection with this girl, rather than getting caught up in your own thoughts and expectations. Try to be present and engaged when you're around her, and focus on getting to know her as a person. Be open and honest about your feelings and intentions, and be willing to listen and communicate openly with her.

Remember, it's important to take care of yourself and prioritize your own well-being, even in matters of the heart. Try to maintain a healthy balance between your thoughts and emotions, and don't let overthinking consume you.

hmm ngl I do think is something that I struggle with hard, not the whole like obsessing over someone its more of uhm. idk I have thought about this but I think its just low self-esteem on my side that does cause it but uhm yea;-; and tbh I do think it has started to negatively impact but not with the interactions more of how I think about the whole thing? So far the overthinking only starts when we stop messaging etc as I think negatively.

but yea idk if anything I'm saying makes sense?

but I will try maintain a balance between it.

thank u for ur reply <3

Reply 5

IDKwhatUsername9

15

Original post by RXD_Sami

bro I ******* love this.

however, in all seriousness, I think imma wait a bit (maybe mid-September as she going to university) but drop small hints, and see her more, and eventually ill give an update which I hope will be a good one :smile:

thank u for ur reply <3