Another night of noisy flat mates
I posted on here yesterday about one of my flat mates bringing his rowdy friends to the flat who keep banging on my door. I decided to try and resolve the issue by talking to the boy I live with directly and politely asked him to please ask his friends to stop banging on my door when I’m trying to sleep or when I’m in my room with the door shut. If I was living with someone who had their door shut most of the time I would respect it and not go hammering their door down but these people have absolutely no respect for anyone and they don’t even live here. I’m really stuck on what to do now because I have tried resolving the issue myself and spoke to the flat mate and explained it’s really annoying and unsettling for me yet they’ve carried on. I don’t know what I can do now !!!
I don’t know if it’s because they just want me to come and drink with them.. but I don’t want to and they just won’t respect it. I’ve only been here 4 days and I’m so fed up already
I don’t know if it’s because they just want me to come and drink with them.. but I don’t want to and they just won’t respect it. I’ve only been here 4 days and I’m so fed up already
Is it private accommodation or uni managed?
Original post by Admit-One
Is it private accommodation or uni managed?
Private
Original post by Anonymous
Private
That may limit your options a bit.
The provider will probably still have a way of reporting unsocialable behaviour. However that's potentiallly a bit of a nuclear option as you still have to live with this person for a year. The unis residential/safety team may be able to have a quiet word as ultimately you aren't feeling safe in your own flat., (but again, potentially escalating things).
I'd try another word with your flatmate, "I'm frustrated because after we last spoke your mates are still hammering on my door at all hours. You said you'd have a word but now I'm a bit stuck as I don't feel especially comfortable in my own flat and if your mates aren't going to listen I've not got many options other than reporting it to (landlord/uni). I don't mind them (some reasonable limit for visiting) but do you think we can work this out?".
Anon,
I can understand your frustration and you have every right to feel annoyed! It is likely that all this behaviour is just because it's the start of term, there away from home for the first time and they are just wanting to 'live it up' a little. Most probably after a week or two they will be tired of getting drunk and will settle back to the fact that they are there to study (assuming that your housemate is also a student).
I would try not to react angrily when they are there, as it may encourage them to knock on your door more or to be more of a nuisance, so though it's irritating it might be an idea to put some music on and to try and drown out the noise or to get some earplugs. I know it's tough but try not to let it wind you up!
Of course you need to be able to sleep and to feel comfortable in your own space. So you could try and speak to your housemate again, at a good time. Try not to use attacking language ('You..... You......You....' or 'Your friends.....' and 'your friends....'), but make it clear how you feel, e.g. 'I feel hurt because I feel my wishes are not being respected. I feel upset because this is my accommodation too' If your housemate still refuses to listen, then you might need to make it clear that you are going to raise it with the landlord if it continues.
All the best,
Oluwatosin – 3rd year student – University of Huddersfield
I can understand your frustration and you have every right to feel annoyed! It is likely that all this behaviour is just because it's the start of term, there away from home for the first time and they are just wanting to 'live it up' a little. Most probably after a week or two they will be tired of getting drunk and will settle back to the fact that they are there to study (assuming that your housemate is also a student).
I would try not to react angrily when they are there, as it may encourage them to knock on your door more or to be more of a nuisance, so though it's irritating it might be an idea to put some music on and to try and drown out the noise or to get some earplugs. I know it's tough but try not to let it wind you up!
Of course you need to be able to sleep and to feel comfortable in your own space. So you could try and speak to your housemate again, at a good time. Try not to use attacking language ('You..... You......You....' or 'Your friends.....' and 'your friends....'), but make it clear how you feel, e.g. 'I feel hurt because I feel my wishes are not being respected. I feel upset because this is my accommodation too' If your housemate still refuses to listen, then you might need to make it clear that you are going to raise it with the landlord if it continues.
All the best,
Oluwatosin – 3rd year student – University of Huddersfield
Original post by University of Huddersfield
Anon,
I can understand your frustration and you have every right to feel annoyed! It is likely that all this behaviour is just because it's the start of term, there away from home for the first time and they are just wanting to 'live it up' a little. Most probably after a week or two they will be tired of getting drunk and will settle back to the fact that they are there to study (assuming that your housemate is also a student).
I would try not to react angrily when they are there, as it may encourage them to knock on your door more or to be more of a nuisance, so though it's irritating it might be an idea to put some music on and to try and drown out the noise or to get some earplugs. I know it's tough but try not to let it wind you up!
Of course you need to be able to sleep and to feel comfortable in your own space. So you could try and speak to your housemate again, at a good time. Try not to use attacking language ('You..... You......You....' or 'Your friends.....' and 'your friends....'), but make it clear how you feel, e.g. 'I feel hurt because I feel my wishes are not being respected. I feel upset because this is my accommodation too' If your housemate still refuses to listen, then you might need to make it clear that you are going to raise it with the landlord if it continues.
All the best,
Oluwatosin – 3rd year student – University of Huddersfield
I can understand your frustration and you have every right to feel annoyed! It is likely that all this behaviour is just because it's the start of term, there away from home for the first time and they are just wanting to 'live it up' a little. Most probably after a week or two they will be tired of getting drunk and will settle back to the fact that they are there to study (assuming that your housemate is also a student).
I would try not to react angrily when they are there, as it may encourage them to knock on your door more or to be more of a nuisance, so though it's irritating it might be an idea to put some music on and to try and drown out the noise or to get some earplugs. I know it's tough but try not to let it wind you up!
Of course you need to be able to sleep and to feel comfortable in your own space. So you could try and speak to your housemate again, at a good time. Try not to use attacking language ('You..... You......You....' or 'Your friends.....' and 'your friends....'), but make it clear how you feel, e.g. 'I feel hurt because I feel my wishes are not being respected. I feel upset because this is my accommodation too' If your housemate still refuses to listen, then you might need to make it clear that you are going to raise it with the landlord if it continues.
All the best,
Oluwatosin – 3rd year student – University of Huddersfield
Thank you for the advice
Unfortunately last night it just got too bad and I have had a meeting today with the accommodation manager who is arranging a room swap for me
Original post by Anonymous
Thank you for the advice
Unfortunately last night it just got too bad and I have had a meeting today with the accommodation manager who is arranging a room swap for me
Unfortunately last night it just got too bad and I have had a meeting today with the accommodation manager who is arranging a room swap for me
Brilliant!
Hope it all works out with the new room.
All the best,
Oluwatosin – 3rd year student – University of Huddersfield
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