Wanting to stay in university hometown after graduation..I can't go 'home'...advice?

Hey guys, I'm in desperate need of advice.

I am originally from London, but I am studying at a university in Yorkshire.

I am currently in my second year, and I plan to graduate in 2016.

The reason why I went to university away from my hometown because I grew up in an abusive family so university was my subtle escape route. I has also experience bullying in primary school and my early years of secondary school so I wanted to escape the area and have a fresh start and start a new life elsewhere.

I have a big dilemma: I would love to go back to London and start my career there - the prospects for the career I want is a lot higher in London than anywhere else. However, most people cannot afford to live in London after graduation. Other problem: I don't want to go to London and start living with my parents. I have been through therapy and I am trying to come to terms with my past, so moving back with my parents would be the worse case scenario.

I wouldn't mind staying up north to be honest, but I am worried about how I'd be able to afford to rent my own home after graduation.

What do I do?

What did you do after graduation? Did you move back to you to your hometown or stay in your uni town?

TLDR: I want to be able to move into my own home after graduation without going back to my abusive family. What do I do?

Reply 1

LonelyDemon

17

I suggest doing a post graduate in a different town afterwards and whilst there look for a place to stay and visit London in your free time.

Reply 2

deviant182

15

Look at either being a live in carer, house over your head and you're paid ti go shopping cook etc for someone.
Or if that doesn't appeal then look at house shares. You could move back to London if you had a job lined up and a house share is often cheaper. So you're renting a room not an entire house and all bills are generally shared unless included in the rent.
This may be better for you.
Ultimately its up to you what you choose to do.

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 3

Sunshineeee

1

Do the people that you live with now plan on staying in your uni town? Couldn't you just carry on living in a house share with them?

Posted from TSR Mobile

Same problem here, except i'm graduating in 4 months. I couldn't commit to another contract without the guarantee of a full time job (otherwise paying rent would be a serious issue) so my friends who are doing 4th years are sorted. Not too sure what to do now, i'd rather sleep on the streets than move back in with my parents.

Don't do a post grad qualification for the sake of it though, it will cost you a small fortune and you'll be stuck doing something you won't necessarily enjoy.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Sunshineeee

Do the people that you live with now plan on staying in your uni town? Couldn't you just carry on living in a house share with them?

Posted from TSR Mobile

No I can't. They are all going back.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by deviant182

Look at either being a live in carer, house over your head and you're paid ti go shopping cook etc for someone.
Or if that doesn't appeal then look at house shares. You could move back to London if you had a job lined up and a house share is often cheaper. So you're renting a room not an entire house and all bills are generally shared unless included in the rent.
This may be better for you.
Ultimately its up to you what you choose to do.

Posted from TSR Mobile

I might consider a house share, but my family might think that's strange - my family is based in London.

If I could stay up North then that would be a good excuse not to go back to live with them.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

*bump*

Reply 8

El Salvador

21

How bout going to Birmingham instead?

Reply 9

AdampskiB

2

You say "hometown" but London is huge. You can live anywhere you like in London.

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by AdampskiB

You say "hometown" but London is huge. You can live anywhere you like in London.

But London is so expensive to live in, which is why I doubt I will be able to afford to live there after graduation.

Reply 11

AdampskiB

2

Original post by Anonymous

But London is so expensive to live in, which is why I doubt I will be able to afford to live there after graduation.

I appreciate your reasons for being eager to stay away from home, but money/jobs isn't going to walk your way. You must walk in its way. Get applying and interested as early as possible, your university will have a careers office where they can advise you for best course of action to take (when to start applying and specifcally how) with consideration to your reasons.

One of my course mates had a placement sorted very early on in our second year, because he started looking and talking to relevant people about it in first year. A very comfortable salary for placement year because he put exceptional effort in, therefore enabling him to have a place to live (rent) in London. Guildford area I think.

My partner and I are looking for places to live (rent) around London and for a flat of our own I think we're looking at around £800-1k p/m in/around/as-far-as Wimbledon. So maybe that gives you an idea on how much to be looking for when job hunting.

Reply 12

sidi

1

If London is too expensive to start with, look for job opportunities up north. That will give you time to save some money and start enquiring about jobs in London. If you do decide to go back to London I think it's perfectly understandable to use uni as the break between living at home and moving out permanently. Loads of companies advertising house shares in London - spareroom.co.uk, gumtree etc. Start looking and see what's available. Also lots of families just renting out a room on the family home quite cheaply.

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by clh_hilary

How bout going to Birmingham instead?

Lol why Birmingham?

Reply 14

bluemax

16

Why don't you look for a job in Yorkshire? or maybe you can look for something in nearby cities. Once you've earned a bit of money you can go back to your hometown with your own place.

Reply 15

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by AdampskiB

I appreciate your reasons for being eager to stay away from home, but money/jobs isn't going to walk your way. You must walk in its way. Get applying and interested as early as possible, your university will have a careers office where they can advise you for best course of action to take (when to start applying and specifcally how) with consideration to your reasons.

One of my course mates had a placement sorted very early on in our second year, because he started looking and talking to relevant people about it in first year. A very comfortable salary for placement year because he put exceptional effort in, therefore enabling him to have a place to live (rent) in London. Guildford area I think.

My partner and I are looking for places to live (rent) around London and for a flat of our own I think we're looking at around £800-1k p/m in/around/as-far-as Wimbledon. So maybe that gives you an idea on how much to be looking for when job hunting.

I understand. I know what it's like to struggle to get a job, I've been through that. That's why I asked this question, because I want to prepare. I want to start saving up money - in fact I have already - and I am already gaining experience - I write for my university magazine, I write for other online magazines, I am looking into doing internships and I already have lots of experience through jobs and work placements I have done.

I will definitely be trying out the careers service at my university. I often go to a lot of careers fairs. I am exploring all my options right now, even though I am in my first year.

I am really trying to do what ever I can, but the problem with abuse is that if you are not financially stable you get sucked in. And abuse is like a curse - it's easy to get sucked back in. And I don't want that to happen.