Muslims, if your child came out as gay?

So one of my cousins recently came out as a lesbian to her family after she turned down a bunch of marriage proposals. Her family are furious and have told her to move out until she chooses to marry a man because they seem to be way more worried about the community than what she wants.

My cousin is heartbroken over this and she doesn't know what to do to get them talking to her again. She's moving in with her girlfriend soon and it got me wondering, Muslims, what would you do if your child came out as gay and had a partner? Would you accept them or not?

Reply 1

z33

21

I would acc be so happy

Reply 2

Cobalt_

21

Will be interesting to see the responses.

As I'm going through something similar to this.

I'd like to think the new generation are more accepting than previous ones however I wont hold my breath.
Something to note as well; How people say they would react is very different in how they would. I'm genuinely interesting to see the responses though.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Big Moisty

You can't change what she is. Silly religion believers.

I don't understand why don't they just accept she is who she is.

I bet if iquestion them enough they'll eventually come to a bull answer of God told me or whatever or refer to some stupid outdated religious teaching or scripture which is in this day and age no logical.

Honestly i have no sympathy for these kind of stupid Muslim parents they're fools.
Seriously just tell your cousin to forget aboiut her family and cut all ties, clearly she's fine as she is now with her gf.

She comes from the Muslim side of our family and I come from the atheist/Hindu side. My side were much more supportive and told her that it wasn't the end of the world and she had her career to focus on.

She did question them and they came up with the "respect your parents" verse from the Quran :I

I honestly can't stand her side of the family tbh.

Reply 4

Big Moisty

2

Original post by Anonymous

She comes from the Muslim side of our family and I come from the atheist/Hindu side. My side were much more supportive and told her that it wasn't the end of the world and she had her career to focus on.

She did question them and they came up with the "respect your parents" verse from the Quran :I

I honestly can't stand her side of the family tbh.

Ok so tell her you can't pick and choose, you either conform to all of of Islam's rules and teacheing or you don't, you can't do half a religion in this case, i.e. you can't pick and choose the best bits out of your religion and ignore other bits.

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

Even if it's seen as a major sin in Islam, I would not mind at all if my child came out as a homosexual. As long as they're happy then that's all that matters tbh

Reply 6

patronusleviosa

8

Original post by Anonymous

Even if it's seen as a major sin in Islam, I would not mind at all if my child came out as a homosexual. As long as they're happy then that's all that matters tbh

i agree. I'd be more concerned if they started smoking or went to the army lololol i don't want my child to die only living half it's life (NOT SAYING THAT THERE'S 100% OF DYING IN THE ARMY BUT)

I know plenty of Muslims at my age who accept homosexuals. Funnily enough, I asked them the same question and they stated that they wouldn't mind if their child came out. I think it's the traditional parents who are more opposed to homosexuality than the younger generation.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 7

ivybridge

6

Genuinely breaks my heart reading things like this. I just cannot fathom why a child you have had inside you for 9 months, a child you have raised and protected, you'd be content losing just because they love somebody with different genitalia to the one you want them to love. I cannot get my head around it. I just can't. She is better off without them and in time, she'll come to see that.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 8

whitetack

4

im sure at some point theyll realise they miss their daughter more than they want to listen to their imaginary friend

Reply 9

BasicMistake

18

Original post by Anonymous

She comes from the Muslim side of our family and I come from the atheist/Hindu side. My side were much more supportive and told her that it wasn't the end of the world and she had her career to focus on.

She did question them and they came up with the "respect your parents" verse from the Quran :I

I honestly can't stand her side of the family tbh.

So which is it?

Reply 10

aarora

18

I cannot understand what the big deal is about being gay/lesbian. Parents should love their child no matter what - how do some just disown them due to their sexuality?! Like so what, get over it!
Religions are based on views/rules from so far in the past - times are changing.

Reply 11

ckfeister

19

Original post by Anonymous

So one of my cousins recently came out as a lesbian to her family after she turned down a bunch of marriage proposals. Her family are furious and have told her to move out until she chooses to marry a man because they seem to be way more worried about the community than what she wants.

My cousin is heartbroken over this and she doesn't know what to do to get them talking to her again. She's moving in with her girlfriend soon and it got me wondering, Muslims, what would you do if your child came out as gay and had a partner? Would you accept them or not?

id walk with pride final message "fk u and your god dam religion " then block the parent and never let them talk to me again

Reply 12

donutellme

18

I'd be disappointed of course, but I'd try not to let it affect my relationship with them. They'd still be my son or daughter, so I'll just pretend they're not.

If they want a partner though, then they can do that after they move out.

Reply 13

HuzaifahN

2

Posted from TSR Mobile
Aint havin children so nufin to worry about.

Reply 14

ivybridge

6

Original post by donutellme

I'd be disappointed of course, but I'd try not to let it affect my relationship with them. They'd still be my son or daughter, so I'll just pretend they're not.

If they want a partner though, then they can do that after they move out.

"Disappointed" - they haven't made some kind of decision to do something you feel is wrong. You haven't the right to feel that way at all. And they will want a partner - they should have the same life everybody else is allowed to have. Do not have children. All this *******s about "they're still my child", what, and that changes when they find someone they love? Pathetic. How can you honestly think you're entitled to stand between your child having the happiness you felt you were entitled to when you found someone you had kids with? Not fit.

Reply 15

ivybridge

6

Original post by HuzaifahN

Posted from TSR Mobile
Aint havin children so nufin to worry about.

It isn't a "worry" anyway.

Reply 16

stop888

11

Sad/confused/disappointed. But wouldn't change my relationship with them. I would recommend they don't act on it and stay celibate forever

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 17

ivybridge

6

Original post by stop888

Sad/confused/ disappointed. But wouldn't change my relationship with them. I would recommend they don't act on it and stay celibate forever

People really need to stop saying "disappointed". It isn't some choive they made or an action they committed. You have no right to be disappointed.

Furthermore, it would be utterly disgusting advice to tell your child to live a lonely and unhappy life being celibate - unless they wanted to be - just so you can feel better about yourself. Depriving your child of the love and relationships you had the luxury of having which led to you creating them, is literally one of the biggest crimes you can commit with your kids. If this is your attitude, do not have children. You'll destroy their life if they are gay.

(edited 7 years ago)

Reply 18

Anonymous #3

I wouldn't disown my child. It takes a lot to even admit to yourself and get comfortable with your own identity so if they came and told me that I'd be very much understanding and appreciative. Islam teaches you can have feelings for those of the same sex, but you cannot physically act on those feelings. A marriage is not valid until it is consummated so gay marriage is therefore illegal as you would need to have sex to make it valid and homosexual sex is forbidden. So we'd talk through other options. Talk through how they feel etc. I don't know what the outcome would be with regards if they had feelings for a person. What I'm trying to say is they will still be my child and I will love them dearly and hurt anyone who makes them feel bad.