The Student Room Group

Nearly 19, no interest in sexual or romantic relationships

And before you say it, I'm not asexual. I do get attracted to people, and I masturbate and that's cool, but the thought of being with someone? Nope. Nooooooooooope. And I figured this was just down to me being a teenager and not 'ready' or whatever, but then I realised that I HATE the thought of a romantic relationship too.
I don't like the idea of cuddling someone, holding hands, or telling them things about myself. Or worse - marriage, children, spending the rest of my life with them. I really hate all that!

Is this normal for my age? I feel like I'm too old for it to be just 'kid hasn't sexually/emotionally matured' because I am a very mature person and I can see why people enjoy the things I don't want to do and wish I enjoyed them too.

I mean, I don't want any romantic relationships but that kind of means I'm doomed to be alone forever :frown: and that's a horrible thought.
Reply 1
Have you tried thinking of it as spending the rest of your life living with a best friend? Not specifically a romantic relationship?

There's nothing wrong with not wanting it. Plenty of people live alone and are happy about it. You're still pretty young too so there's no rush in figuring it out. As long as you are happy with it.
Perhaps you fall into the category of aromanticism?

Or there could be some deeper issue revolving allowing people to get close to you, or issues with commitment. If you suspect this to be the case, then you should seek counselling or therapy. :smile:

If not, then you could find yourself a life partner. There are other people like you out there who wouldn't want a romantic relationship, you aren't alone.
Reply 3
Original post by Devify
Have you tried thinking of it as spending the rest of your life living with a best friend? Not specifically a romantic relationship?



yes. i don't mind that. to me the closeness you feel with a friend is different to that of a romantic partner.
with romantic relationships there's a dependancy on each other, a loyalty and promise to devote your lives to one another. friendship is more casual. I like casual.
Reply 4
Original post by Anonymous
Perhaps you fall into the category of aromanticism?

Or there could be some deeper issue revolving allowing people to get close to you, or issues with commitment. If you suspect this to be the case, then you should seek counselling or therapy. :smile:

If not, then you could find yourself a life partner. There are other people like you out there who wouldn't want a romantic relationship, you aren't alone.


I hadn't even heard of that before....I'm not one to stick a label on something that might just be a phase(I'm sure it's not but hey, I'm still young), but I just read an article about a woman who's aromantic and it sounds just like me. Particularly wanted time away from partner (as you would with a friend - you wouldn't see them every day!) and being seen as cold or not committed for doing so.
Thanks so much for your comment
Reply 5
i am literally the same!! turning 19 next month and i have never been & am not interested in relationships. idk im not really bothered - but now im off to uni lol and idk what everyone'll think if they hear that ive not had a boyfriend or been kissed or that im virgin lol. im not bothered whatsoever cause im not into any of that but dont know what to expect when others hear it lol.
Reply 6
A-sexual?
Either way it doesn't mean you'll be alone, you might develop an interest or if not theres always friends and ill be damned if there arent plenty of people who are like you and want a plutonic relationship

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