Will I be a virgin forever?

Hiya
Found this forum while searching in google "I am a virgin I hate my life". I wound up here.

I'm 21 straight male, I work out(without going over the top), I dress nicely. It seems all I can do well at is my career, and I'm okay with my studies (film). But I can't take any joy from these things because my head is doing this while I am doing this trying to get a girl. Going around in circles. What value can I see in living my life if I have nobody to share it with?
I want a relationship. (Please don't respond with - "oh maybe you're just getting too attached", I would also like random-sex too. I just need to do it at least one for god's sake. A relationship would be great but my God can't you understand the pain I'm going through?)

My brain (and other areas) are really starting to hurt, thinking about this. Everyone else is having these grand problems with their partners like "oh dear oh my, he doesn't last long enough"
"oh gosh his penis was bla bla bla size-description"
"oh I just had too much sex the other night it hurts now."
I can't even get close to that stage yet.
I mean I can flirt pretty well. I have a lot of attractive female friends and I can flirt with them the whole night. One of them came back to my house last night and just went to bed and to sleep. Didn't even get a kiss! I see some of my friends who are too afraid to even talk to girls, and THEY have had sex! I have had nothing!

I don't want to sound desperate. But that is exactly what I am. I don't want to just throw it away. Frankly I don't think I would even know how to throw it away. I've never done it once in 21 years.

ARGH
I don't think I am ugly. I've asked a couple of girls and they say I'm attractive, that my looks are not the problem. But the only leeway I ever get is
"You have to be honest with a girl"
"you have to be tender and loving and buy her shoes"
Well anyone can do that stuff. That's the obvious answer. But what's after that. What makes me special enough to sleep with.
ARGH

After 6 years of trying non-stop I'm still here alone. Nobody wants me. And I swear if someone says "you just haven't found that special person yet" I will break a window. Everyone else is having sex regardless of wether its a 'special someone' or not. RIDONKULOUS!

I feel like I'm living a surrealists wet dream. My world is completely upside down. I have been in so many situations where I was an inch away of finally having sex and something absolutely ridonkulous gets in the way. I feel like Sisyphus pushing the boulder up the hill. I work and I work and I work at it. Eventually I get pretty close. And then it just goes to pieces and I have to start all over again.

When my friends tell me about all the sex they're having, good sex, bad sex, problems in sex I just get so depressed knowing I have nothing to bring to the table. Girls talk to me about their sex problems. All I can give is advice on what sounds like the right answer but never having experiencing it I can't even talk to them about having even done it once. INSERT SWEARWORD HERE.

And I want to do it properly. I don't want to go to a brothel (I might have to if I don't have sex by the time I'm 40). I want to be a part of this gang thats having sex and worrying about things and having issues with sex-related items.

Please help me. Please please please. My life is in ruins because of it. this forum makes me depressed seeing all the other people who have queries about their sex. I just wish I could understand!
With all this stress I could have a heart-attack tomorrow.

I'm willing to try anything

Hiya
Found this forum while searching in google "I am a virgin I hate my life". I wound up here.

I'm 21 straight male, I work out(without going over the top), I dress nicely. It seems all I can do well at is my career, and I'm okay with my studies (film). But I can't take any joy from these things because my head is doing this while I am doing this trying to get a girl. Going around in circles. What value can I see in living my life if I have nobody to share it with?
I want a relationship. (Please don't respond with - "oh maybe you're just getting too attached", I would also like random-sex too. I just need to do it at least one for god's sake. A relationship would be great but my God can't you understand the pain I'm going through?)

My brain (and other areas) are really starting to hurt, thinking about this. Everyone else is having these grand problems with their partners like "oh dear oh my, he doesn't last long enough"
"oh gosh his penis was bla bla bla size-description"
"oh I just had too much sex the other night it hurts now."
I can't even get close to that stage yet.
I mean I can flirt pretty well. I have a lot of attractive female friends and I can flirt with them the whole night. One of them came back to my house last night and just went to bed and to sleep. Didn't even get a kiss! I see some of my friends who are too afraid to even talk to girls, and THEY have had sex! I have had nothing!

I don't want to sound desperate. But that is exactly what I am. I don't want to just throw it away. Frankly I don't think I would even know how to throw it away. I've never done it once in 21 years.

ARGH
I don't think I am ugly. I've asked a couple of girls and they say I'm attractive, that my looks are not the problem. But the only leeway I ever get is
"You have to be honest with a girl"
"you have to be tender and loving and buy her shoes"
Well anyone can do that stuff. That's the obvious answer. But what's after that. What makes me special enough to sleep with.
ARGH

After 6 years of trying non-stop I'm still here alone. Nobody wants me. And I swear if someone says "you just haven't found that special person yet" I will break a window. Everyone else is having sex regardless of wether its a 'special someone' or not. RIDONKULOUS!

I feel like I'm living a surrealists wet dream. My world is completely upside down. I have been in so many situations where I was an inch away of finally having sex and something absolutely ridonkulous gets in the way. I feel like Sisyphus pushing the boulder up the hill. I work and I work and I work at it. Eventually I get pretty close. And then it just goes to pieces and I have to start all over again.

When my friends tell me about all the sex they're having, good sex, bad sex, problems in sex I just get so depressed knowing I have nothing to bring to the table. Girls talk to me about their sex problems. All I can give is advice on what sounds like the right answer but never having experiencing it I can't even talk to them about having even done it once. INSERT SWEARWORD HERE.

And I want to do it properly. I don't want to go to a brothel (I might have to if I don't have sex by the time I'm 40). I want to be a part of this gang thats having sex and worrying about things and having issues with sex-related items.

Please help me. Please please please. My life is in ruins because of it. this forum makes me depressed seeing all the other people who have queries about their sex. I just wish I could understand!
With all this stress I could have a heart-attack tomorrow.

I'm willing to try anything

You're all right so I will respond one by one
G8D: Yes.
Me: Yes.
James’: Yes
Me: Yes

omonoiatis9: 16 yo, feels the same.
And I think I was the same as you are at 16. The closest I got was with a co-worker who was 20. She drove us out to a hidden road but I was so nervous I couldn’t do it not to mention it was like 2 degrees outside. So she broke up with me because I didn’t perform Later I found out she had a weird fetish for younger boys of ~16.
Anyway I’m still a virgin at 21. I pray to God you aren’t here in 5 years.

Qasman: Heard of prostitution?
I was considering doing that but that could potentially be more depressing than being a virgin. Not to mention it wouldn’t be a healthy sex life and I still wouldn’t be able to talk about sex like I really knew it, because I’m not experiencing it as it would usually present itself. I know beggars can’t be choosers, but what I’m asking God for here isn’t ‘just sex’. I want a healthy, active sex life.
I want to be a part of the sexual community.
Maybe when I’m a 40 year old virgin I will go to a brothel because I will have no other choice.

Ozzyoscy: Until you spend less time making huge posts the short-term future is not bright.
Impreza18: You spend too much time dwelling on these forums rather than getting some ass.

That is right. If I could be out clubbing and attempting to pick up chicks 24/7 I would. I’d be bound to get closer then. At the moment I go out about 2 times a week to social events where I attempt to find a connection, but if you look at it another way – I’m always trying to be at the top of my game in case my luck suddenly changes.
If I knew how to get ass, I would have gotten it by now. There is definitely something I’m missing.

Higgy90
tl;dr
yes
/thread
Sry. Iz vrgn- wtf! hlp!

Anonymous user#2: 19yo, feels the same, thinks that it will happen when you least expect it
Are you actually that disappointed that you haven't had any meaningless one night stands? Sex is not the most important thing in life. Being a virgin doesn’t define you.

Well I have definitely tried ‘not trying’ in the past and it really does nothing except make you overlooked. Usually I find people who are naturally gifted in the area of getting with girls/guys, and don’t need to try, tell us this because they can’t see the world through our eyes. It is rubbish. Going with the flow is fine, but you still need to channel yourself towards the girl.
And as for your question. I’m sad that I fail at life. And I fail at life because I can’t have sex with anyone- meaningful or meaningless. I have no sex life. Everyone I know has had sex at least once and most can talk about it like it’s a regular thing. I’m alone. Beggars cannot be choosers.
At the moment I’ve managed to sort out all the other areas in my life and this is the last thing, and it seems to be the most important thing to me personally.
What value can I gain from ordinary life if all I have to go home to is my bed where I can fall asleep and think about how pointless my existence is ; all the while someone is about to break through the wall of the apartment next to me with their intense shagging and I bet they’ll be sleeping easy if they sleep at all. Being a virgin hasn’t defined me directly but it has certainly changed the course of my life. If it is our choices and our actions that define us then virginity has affected my identity because I can’t relate socially the world of sexuality.


Ilora-Danon: Felt the same up until 6 months ago. Says they really do happen when you least expect it.
I don’t think I have been friend zoned. I’ve seen it happen to other people, and my friends and it used to happen to me much more when I was starting out.
Also I know what you mean about trying not to appear like I’m trying too hard because I used to see my friends do that all the time as well and I made sure I never looked like such a try-hard. So while I am trying at all times, I am 99.999% certain that people can’t pick it up. Of course I’m taking down that veil now because if I didn’t my long-arse posts would be 10000 times longer trying to sound like I’m doing alright when really I’m not. I don’t want to sound whiney but 23 just sounds like a long time to wait to start something which is really just a natural interaction for humans. I know you must have found ‘the right one’ but to me ‘the right one’ and having sex aren’t linked. I should be able to have sex like everyone else is doing, and then have sex again when I end up finding the right one. I just want to be a normal/natural human being you know?

So I know I might sound defiant here or ridiculous but I don’t want to sound rude. The truth is I am really grateful for all the responses, and I’m still trying to get to the core of the problem. If I ever solve it in my life I’m going to write a novel and give it away for free so that nobody should have to live as lonely as this.

Until you spend less time making huge posts the short-term future is not bright.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uHgNo7PnEWE


i m 23, virgin, very happy. i am following my buddhist philosophy. if i had sex and got an unexpected baby i will not my partner abort it. so i decided that i will not have sex until i get married. if u r christian/muslim same thing applies. sex only lasts for few hours maximum. and u can not have sex 365 a day . u get fed up. its like eating ur favorite ice cream everyday..So wait. if u r serious into having a relationship there are the guides. buy or Download from Btjunkie


Blueprint Decoded - social Dynamics
Real Social Dynamics - Foundations
Natural flawless
how to be an alpha man ( awesome book )

those videos are about Dating. to change ur life get the book " beyond positive thinking" and check out my sig.
the desire for having sex is like a dog is trying to eat a bone without flesh. the dog will never get rid of hunger, but will be always satisfied. same with other things like moeny etc...
rsdnation forum can be helpful to u. but its too extreme.

No, if you ever write a post that long again, i will personaly hunt you down and rape your little virgin arse ok? Now get off your computer, go out, find a girl, slip her some roofies and make a nice little white mark all over her face... GOOD DAY SIR!

Dude, you can buy sex in this modern world. So, will you be a virgin forever? Depends on how desperate/moralistic you are. You could lose your virginity tomorrow.

Honestly, do you want to know what I think the problem is? I think virgins aren't depraved enough to get the job done sometimes. A lot of **** is talked about sex. The men who get the most 'sex' (that sounds wrong but I'm standing by it) in my experience are the ones who demean themselves enough to try anything.

Except, without coming across as desperate.

Weird world, can't solve your problem, don't actually know what it is.