Confused on what to do?!

I have a guy friend (Let's call him Jim). I'm a guy too by the way.

Jim is going out with another friend of mine that is female (Lets call her Margaret).

Jim and Margaret are both in my friendship group, they both have the same friends as each other.

I have known Margaret since playgroup... so about 16 years?
I have known Jim for about 4 years?

Whilst Jim and Margaret were going out, Jim went to a party....
I am not sure how drunk he got but he does remember what happened.

Jim and another guy at the party (Lets call him Tony).
So Tony and Jim went to the bathroom together and locked the door.
They were in there for hours.
It turns out that Tony gave Jim a blowjob.

Margaret doesn't know !

But I do, and so do many other people !
This happened about a year ago or so.
Margaret still doesn't know !
But Margaret suspects something did happen that night!

As Margaret and Jim are both friends of mine (Margaret I feel is a closer friend) I am in a moral dilemma ....

Do I get involved?
I feel bad for Margaret that she doesn't know what happened.

Should I talk to Jim about what he has done and whether he should tell her?

Should I just not get involved?

tl;dr My two good friends (Male and the other Female) are going out with each other, one of them (The male) received a blowjob from a GUY at a party. The female friend is closer to me than the guy friend. Female friend doesn't know, but suspects. Should I tell her? Or talk to him first? The incident happened about a year ago.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 1

twittw00

Talk to 'Jim' and see what he says. To be honest, as he was drunk and it was over a year ago, 'Margaret' should understand and not be too bothered. If that happened to my boyfriend, to be honest I wouldn't know my reaction (probably laugh because my boyfriend would be freaked out - bless him) But anyway, if 'Jim' says not to tell 'Margaret' ask him why, if you think it's reasonable, then maybe just say something like "don't you think she should know?". You may have to bargain with him and say "well if you wont tell her, I will." It's not being nasty, but I think she has the right to know what happened, especially as everyone else seems to know.
You never know, she might already have been told and has just not said anything through embarrassment or something!

Good luck! :smile: