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Struggling to maintain erection in certain scenarios

Hi there - hoping someone can help me. I have been having a problem with my new girlfriend where I cannot keep an erection in certain scenarios, usually when I am about to penetrate her.

This has been an issue since we were going out, at first I put it down to stress or being tired and thought that we may never have sex but now we have gotten over that hurdle and the sex has been brilliant. However, I am still finding that there are some instances where I will lose my erection right before we are about to penetrate. I am wondering if anyone can suggest anything? I have done some research online and feel like it could be down to me being stressed, but I find that even when I dont feel stressed I am having this issue. It's almost like a self-fulfilling whole where sometimes I am worried whether I will keep the erection (like last time) and then sure as hell I do.

It is naturally annoying but heartbreaking for me as I get her to the stage where she thinks we are about to have sex and then we cannot.

Can anyone suggest anything? I am mid-20's, fairly healthy - eat well but need to do more exercise (which I am doing now), don't smoke and only drink occasionally.

Reply 1

username1060288

Original post by Anonymous

It is naturally annoying but heartbreaking for me as I get her to the stage where she thinks we are about to have sex and then we cannot.

I sympathise but I'm not sure what is causing it. It could be stress or anxiety. Personally, I would try to power on for a few weeks and see if things improve, whilst trying to put it out of your head. If you don't see any improvement, maybe consider the GP.

I picked out the bit in quotes because I can imagine the situation and have been in a similar one with a boyfriend myself (he couldn't ever come). My feeling was that I was sharing in the frustration and felt really bad for the pain I could see he felt but I wasn't overly bothered by the lack of action...the intimacy was really nice and special and actually, you sometimes get more intimacy when things aren't 100% perfect. She will not be disappointed in you.

Reply 2

Pedin

You're over thinking it, getting an erection is becoming the main thought during things and it's causing you to lose it. If you do lose it you can always warm yourself back up to it. Go back into the foreplay until you're ready again. You'll get there eventually, over thinking it will only make it more difficult to maintain it.