Why do people find it weird if i commute?
i commute about 30mins on train and the uni is near the train station. train station is near my house
people say "isnt that expensive" Yes? but much cheaper than staying in halls..
i dont drink or party or go clubbing (religious reasons) so i would be the one "who doesnt go out" and id rather be classed as the one who commutes than the one "who doesnt go out/drink" lol so many people bitch about them.
i know staying out doesn't mean its about drinking and partying. but that is what the half the student life is about. I have had no problem making friends i made around 15 on the first day, which is the most friends ive ever had lol
Swhat are your thoughts what should i say when people find it weird that i commute or get shocked or ask my why i decided to stay home? without sounding sad and explaining too much about my personal beliefs
if i say i dont drink and go clubbing i might come across as sad and hinder the chances of becoming friends with these people
people say "isnt that expensive" Yes? but much cheaper than staying in halls..
i dont drink or party or go clubbing (religious reasons) so i would be the one "who doesnt go out" and id rather be classed as the one who commutes than the one "who doesnt go out/drink" lol so many people bitch about them.
i know staying out doesn't mean its about drinking and partying. but that is what the half the student life is about. I have had no problem making friends i made around 15 on the first day, which is the most friends ive ever had lol
Swhat are your thoughts what should i say when people find it weird that i commute or get shocked or ask my why i decided to stay home? without sounding sad and explaining too much about my personal beliefs
if i say i dont drink and go clubbing i might come across as sad and hinder the chances of becoming friends with these people
Short answer: there's loads of people who don't drink in uni.
Long answer: I was almost teetotal through four years of uni and I hate clubs. Somehow I ended up being best of friends with the most notorious party animal going. Why? Because we both had interests other than getting wrecked.
If someone objects to you having pursuits other than going to exactly the same student theme nights as every other university town or city does every other year (Smurfs? leopard spots?)... well you really shouldn't lose sleep over it.
Long answer: I was almost teetotal through four years of uni and I hate clubs. Somehow I ended up being best of friends with the most notorious party animal going. Why? Because we both had interests other than getting wrecked.
If someone objects to you having pursuits other than going to exactly the same student theme nights as every other university town or city does every other year (Smurfs? leopard spots?)... well you really shouldn't lose sleep over it.
Original post by idontknowaname
i commute about 30mins on train and the uni is near the train station. train station is near my house
people say "isnt that expensive" Yes? but much cheaper than staying in halls..
i dont drink or party or go clubbing (religious reasons) so i would be the one "who doesnt go out" and id rather be classed as the one who commutes than the one "who doesnt go out/drink" lol so many people bitch about them.
i know staying out doesn't mean its about drinking and partying. but that is what the half the student life is about. I have had no problem making friends i made around 15 on the first day, which is the most friends ive ever had lol
Swhat are your thoughts what should i say when people find it weird that i commute or get shocked or ask my why i decided to stay home? without sounding sad and explaining too much about my personal beliefs
if i say i dont drink and go clubbing i might come across as sad and hinder the chances of becoming friends with these people
people say "isnt that expensive" Yes? but much cheaper than staying in halls..
i dont drink or party or go clubbing (religious reasons) so i would be the one "who doesnt go out" and id rather be classed as the one who commutes than the one "who doesnt go out/drink" lol so many people bitch about them.
i know staying out doesn't mean its about drinking and partying. but that is what the half the student life is about. I have had no problem making friends i made around 15 on the first day, which is the most friends ive ever had lol
Swhat are your thoughts what should i say when people find it weird that i commute or get shocked or ask my why i decided to stay home? without sounding sad and explaining too much about my personal beliefs
if i say i dont drink and go clubbing i might come across as sad and hinder the chances of becoming friends with these people
i commute by bus cause i live 20 mins away from my uni and i have had people ask why. i am glad i made the decision to commute in cause i have so much more money spare and it just suits me really. I know before i started uni people were saying oh you'll find it hard to make friends, but on my first day alone i made around 5 friends and then more since then, some i'm not as close to but i have a lot of people i will call friends and will probably be close friends in the future. i don't like drinking or partying either but it hasn't stopped me from making good friends and enjoying myself at uni so i have absolutely no regrets
Because you dont have the independace and the experience of living on your own. I hate commuting I so wish I lived out but my parents never let me. Im in my final year now.
I guess that there is this prejudice that if you stay at home you may find yourself never going out socialising, not making any friends on your course (or in halls, that for more obvious reasons), living with your parents (who you are somewhat unhealthily dependent on), and spending an awful lot of time on your laptop experiencing university life vicariously through a student forum.
Oh wait
University is somewhat conflated with independence and rite of passage, there's no reason you can't prove them wrong!
Oh wait
University is somewhat conflated with independence and rite of passage, there's no reason you can't prove them wrong!
its all about how you feel about it. If you find commuting okay why do you even care what others think? Also trust me, next year noone will care whether you commute or not, its only freshers who are now experiencing too much freedom too quickly but living in a small hole and spending all your time in just 1 room is not that cool either, you at least have the comfort of a proper home.
If someone is not friendly with you just cos your a commuter then i don't think you should even try to be his friend. Im sure there are plenty of other people at your uni.
And one could argue that you will get less chance to get to know other people. And while its not a wrong assumption, but it doesn't mean you will be completely excluded, in fact you can still get a few good friends around yourself (quality over quantity) and you have the advantage of living in your home town where you already know a lot of people (friends from school and maybe you have a girlfriend already and staying home saves you from long distance relationship etc…), so saying that a home student miss out on socialising is completely false.
If someone is not friendly with you just cos your a commuter then i don't think you should even try to be his friend. Im sure there are plenty of other people at your uni.
And one could argue that you will get less chance to get to know other people. And while its not a wrong assumption, but it doesn't mean you will be completely excluded, in fact you can still get a few good friends around yourself (quality over quantity) and you have the advantage of living in your home town where you already know a lot of people (friends from school and maybe you have a girlfriend already and staying home saves you from long distance relationship etc…), so saying that a home student miss out on socialising is completely false.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Maker
Most people think part of going to uni is growing up and leaving home to live your own life.
commuting from home shows you are unwilling to grow up and cut the apron strings. To them, you want to remain a child dependent on your parents.
commuting from home shows you are unwilling to grow up and cut the apron strings. To them, you want to remain a child dependent on your parents.
yet those living at home tend to behave more mature which is a sure sign of growing up
Original post by benji385
yet those living at home tend to behave more mature which is a sure sign of growing up
If you want to deceive yourself, go ahead.
Staying at home while at uni is equivalent to wearing a coat with gloves attached to strings so you won't loose them when you were a kid.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Maker
If you want to deceive yourself, go ahead.
Staying at home while at uni is equivalent to wearing a coat with gloves attached to strings so you won't loose them when you were a kid.
Staying at home while at uni is equivalent to wearing a coat with gloves attached to strings so you won't loose them when you were a kid.
Well I lived in halls during my first year, but now I live at home. I have 2 friends who did the same, 1st year in halls just to get the feeling and then move back home to stop wasting money. Honestly I don't feel less grown up now than in my first year. Although I have to admit it does depend on your parents, whether they treat you like a kid or they accept that you are now an adult. and don't just blame parents, some people have totally cool parents who would let you do anything, yet some kids are to shy to live with the opportunity. It also depends on your personality, living on your own really does miracles to some, others would have been far better off staying at home to get that education they pay for. You really just can't generalise and say that someone living at home is less ready for life than those who live at the uni.
(edited 9 years ago)
Original post by Maker
If you want to deceive yourself, go ahead.
Staying at home while at uni is equivalent to wearing a coat with gloves attached to strings so you won't loose them when you were a kid.
Staying at home while at uni is equivalent to wearing a coat with gloves attached to strings so you won't loose them when you were a kid.
I don't think its fair to make such a statement to be honest. There are other reasons for people choosing to stay at home. I commute around an hour from my house to university, and I'm not finding it too much of a problem - I'd say I was pretty lucky compared to others who have had to travel thousands of miles from home. There is no point in me spending as much as £6000 a year for accommodation that I don't need, not to mention the fact that living conditions in halls are worse and its a lot easier to get distracted and forget you are primarily there to work. Its not like those in halls are more mature and so they chose to move out - most of them have no option other than to stay in halls. I'm sure if they had the choice they'd still be at home.
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