Girl I am talking to still has pictures of her ex on her instagram

So I have been talking to her for a a couple of months now and it is evident that she likes me. However, she still has pictures of her ex boyfriend of 2 years on her instagram. This semi has got to me recently but also my mates ruin me about it. Firstly, is it right or wrong to have them there? Secondly, how should i deal with it?

(edited 5 years ago)

Reply 1

OmnomnOmnigul

14

He is a part of her past whether you like it or not, and deleting pictures of him from her Instagram isn't going to change that. You have to trust that she likes you, and the pictures are just an aspect of her past. It's right for her to have them there firstly, because it's her IG and she can have what she wants on there, and secondly because you're only bothered by those pictures because of your own insecurities. I'd suggest focusing on building your own relationship with her and stop worrying about someone who is no longer a part of her life.

Reply 2

Profesh

20

Relationships come and go: memories endure. If you're too jealous to accept that other people are also capable of making your partner happy then don't expect to create any of your own.

Reply 3

Anonymous #1

Thats pretty peak. I don't think you're wrong for feeling like that, he's her ex she shouldn't have anything to do with him anymore, especially if she says she likes you. I think you should eventually ask her whats up with those pictures cuz thats bang out of order

Reply 4

Anonymous #2

Original post by OmnomnOmnigul

He is a part of her past whether you like it or not, and deleting pictures of him from her Instagram isn't going to change that. You have to trust that she likes you, and the pictures are just an aspect of her past. It's right for her to have them there firstly, because it's her IG and she can have what she wants on there, and secondly because you're only bothered by those pictures because of your own insecurities. I'd suggest focusing on building your own relationship with her and stop worrying about someone who is no longer a part of her life.

cheers this is the response, I wanted. This is the reason she gave, I was just interested to see if others would see it like that. Cheers mate. I completely agree with you building the realtionship is the aim. How do you suggest dealing with people who question it?

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

Yeah I made out that I’m jealous, i’m not I know she likes me. I was just interested on the response because I feel my mates are being unreasonable

Original post by Profesh

Relationships come and go: memories endure. If you're too jealous to accept that other people are also capable of making your partner happy then don't expect to create any of your own.

Reply 6

username4421160

12

Some people simply think it's pointless, petty, or too much effort to delete their exes off all their social media. This guy is no longer in her life so it shouldn't matter.

Reply 7

Anonymous #3

Don't worry about it! I've been in the same position as your girlfriend and honestly, as far as my (and my other friends') experience goes, you leave the pictures there because you don't want to just completely erase a whole period of your life, NOT because you're not over the guy. (Alternatively, maybe the colours/filters of the picture just look good on her page lol.) I still have the pictures of my boyfriend from almost three years ago on my Instagram, and I assure you I don't feel a thing for him. We haven't talked for years and don't even live in the same country anymore. But I don't want to be scrolling through my timeline and there's this massive void where I've erased my life because I no longer like the person who shared it. So don't worry!!!!With regards to what you can do, if it REALLY bothers you don't let it fester - communication is important. BUUUUT, personally I wouldn't mention it at this early stage in the relationship. See how things go. When you've been together a while, bring it up directly and politely. She probably won't have even realised how it makes you feel

Reply 8

Anonymous #2

Original post by Homo Fuge

Some people simply think it's pointless, petty, or too much effort to delete their exes off all their social media. This guy is no longer in her life so it shouldn't matter.

yeah I agree, is what it is. cheers

Reply 9

SoftGingerCat

19

I have pictures of my ex on my Instagram and my boyfriend doesn’t mind, he just kinda come to accept that it doesn’t matter and we make up for it by posting so many selfies together that we basically own the cringe hashtag

Reply 10

Povichbaby

1

Ignore them they don’t matter only ones who’s opinions matter is yours and hers. Don’t seek validation from others

Reply 11

Neurocandid

19

Original post by bennythebear27

So I have been talking to her for a a couple of months now and it is evident that she likes me. However, she still has pictures of her ex boyfriend of 2 years on her instagram. This semi has got to me recently but also my mates ruin me about it. Firstly, is it right or wrong to have them there? Secondly, how should i deal with it?

Just do your thing

Regarding the pics, there’s NO point of getting salty and deleting pics of your ex -that’s so yesterday

Reply 12

MajiMag

After being with her for 6 months you could definitely ask her why she still have pictures of her ex and if she comes with a good reason you could say:

Reply 13

Anonymous #4

After being with her for 6 months you could definitely ask her why she still have pictures of her ex and if she comes with a good reason you could say: "For some reason it just bothers me a bit but I understand it is totally up to you". If she hasn't deleted the pictures after another 6 months - bring it up again or dump her.

Reply 14

**^$#

1

Original post by bennythebear27

So I have been talking to her for a a couple of months now and it is evident that she likes me. However, she still has pictures of her ex boyfriend of 2 years on her instagram. This semi has got to me recently but also my mates ruin me about it. Firstly, is it right or wrong to have them there? Secondly, how should i deal with it?

Here's the difference people are missing. It's totally normal to keep photos of an ex for your own memories. You can keep them in a private folder or an archive on the cloud. What's not normal and should be a red flag is if she has them on social media for everyone to see. It implies that she still has feelings, hasn't moved on. It can be a covert way of signaling those feelings to her ex if he looks at her profile and sees all the old photos of them together. Her keeping them up is like a signal to him that there's still something there in her mind and can give him a reason to try again. Ex's can come and go regardless of pictures but this to me is a sign something is off. Most women who aren't attached to their exes take photos down because they understand how it looks to him and others. I otally understand your apprehension. Relationships take a lot of time and effort and you can be seriously hurt in the end so knowing in advance if someone could potentially leave you for an ex who they still love is pretty important. You don't wanna waste your time only to get hurt in the end. She should be aware that keeping the photos up for everyone to see is implying she still has some feelings. Doesn't take a genius to figure out that one. If it was totally over the photos would be in an archive for her eyes only.

Girl I am talking to still has pictures of her ex on her instagram

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