crush on male when I'm a lesbian

I have a crush on my (male presenting) best friend who is in a relationship with someone else. they are polyamorous. I want to be a part of that relationship but they both think I'm a lesbian. I have romantic feelings for them. I'm so sexually confused it's unreal! what do I do?

Reply 1

username5319484

19

I am incredibly confused.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by hungrysalamander

I am incredibly confused.

I am about as confused as this post reads </3

my best friend, he's got a girlfriend
they are both open to polyamoury

I am a girl (young adult)
I have a crush on my best friend and want to join the relationship

but they both think I only like girls
and I don't want to ruin our friendship

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

If you like your guy best friend, would that not mean you like both guys and girls (which is completely fine) and if you are interested in joining their relationship i guess that's something you would have to decide how best to tackle. maybe being upfront about it will work.

Reply 4

SagaciousSag

20

Original post by Anonymous

I am about as confused as this post reads </3

my best friend, he's got a girlfriend
they are both open to polyamoury

I am a girl (young adult)
I have a crush on my best friend and want to join the relationship

but they both think I only like girls
and I don't want to ruin our friendship

You should be upfront about it if you decide that you want to go ahead with it. Worst thing is that you find out early on that it’s not for you, say it isn’t and leave the relationship.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Anonymous

If you like your guy best friend, would that not mean you like both guys and girls (which is completely fine) and if you are interested in joining their relationship i guess that's something you would have to decide how best to tackle. maybe being upfront about it will work.

thanks, yeah, you're probably right.
I've had trauma from past hetero relationships and have just stuck to girls from there on out. I definitely have a preference for girls & am on the asexual spectrum for dudes but that hasn't stopped me falling head over heels for this guy.

I might wait a bit and think things over, whether it's worth risking the friendship or not and whether there's a chance he likes me - we've had some flirtatious moments but nothing solid, all could be passed off as being reasonably jokey - I also need to get to know his partner better. he did ask me to live with him and his partner in the future which is kinda sus.

they're pretty open (I mean, find me a poly person who isn't pretty open) so honesty will be the best policy <3

Reply 6

Junaid1986

7

Original post by Anonymous

I have a crush on my (male presenting) best friend who is in a relationship with someone else. they are polyamorous. I want to be a part of that relationship but they both think I'm a lesbian. I have romantic feelings for them. I'm so sexually confused it's unreal! what do I do?

"I'm so sexually confused"

Yep, that you are..

Reply 7

bxoksbxrbie.

3

wow, how did this work out?

Reply 8

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by bxoksbxrbie.

wow, how did this work out?

so he broke up with her about a month after I posted this thread which was unrelated to me.

I've been with him for 5 months ish! Life is good. I've never felt so supported in my life and I love every moment I spend with him :smile:

and we're experimenting with different people here and there but just taking things slow and making sure we put each other first

Reply 9

anosmianAcrimony

20

Original post by Anonymous

so he broke up with her about a month after I posted this thread which was unrelated to me.

I've been with him for 5 months ish! Life is good. I've never felt so supported in my life and I love every moment I spend with him :smile:

and we're experimenting with different people here and there but just taking things slow and making sure we put each other first

Wow that's amazing! Love hearing about a happy continuation :biggrin:

Reply 10

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by bxoksbxrbie.

wow, how did this work out?

oh and I've worked out I'm probably demisexual towards guys hence why this guy is like a one-off lol. I gotta have a really good connection to a guy before I become attracted whereas girls are just hot it cannot be denied 😌