I have a BF... but I'm starting to fancy women?

I'm female and I've considered myself straight all my life. I've had crushes on guys, i've gone out with guys..

I have a boyfriend currently. He's kind, funny, good looking, just an all around lovely guy. But the thing is... I'm starting to find myself attracted to females.

There are atleast 4 women I'm attracted to, plus plenty of female celebrities. I sometimes think about these people intimately, but i also imagine being close to them, like a GF/GF way... :frown:

This is all making me miserable. I love my boyfriend but as the time goes on, im finding myself more excited by women and less attracted to him....why am I lusting after women? :frown:

I'm so confused. Any advice?

Reply 1

Davy Noo

It could be that you're just curious, many people, especially girls, are at a young age. Out of interest how old are you?

But if it's not "lust", then to quote an old cliché it's probably just a phase, you may find that if you tried anything you wouldn't enjoy it even though it seems appealing to you.

Reply 2

username246000

If you saw me naked then I can turn you straight again.

Reply 3

Brouhaha

It could be that you're bisexual, and that you're fixating on these women because you're bored with your boyfriend.

But, you could be a lesbian. It depends. Are you becoming less and less attracted to HIM, or to men in general? Some girls do have crushes on men and later turn out to be lesbian. How do you feel when you're, y'know, intimate with your boyfriend? Whether or not you've had sex, how do you feel when you kiss him? And how old are you?

If you still get turned on by guys too, it could be that you've just got some sexual fluidity and that perhaps the reason you're going off your boyfriend is separate. If however you're liking girls more and realising you've never REALLY liked guys, could be a sign.

But please don't be in a rush to define yourself. As a bisexual woman I often hate the phrase, but for you, it MIGHT be just a phase. Whether or not you break up with your boyfriend, take some time to really think about who you are. If it's the occasional fantasy about women, don't worry, even my straight friends apparently have those. If you get feelings for women better and stronger and different to how you feel about men, however, you might need to take some time to reassess what you want.

Reply 4

lostdoll

I always think "you're allowed to look" in relationships... Of course you're always going to find other people attractive.

But this sounds like it's distressing you quite a bit. Do you have a close friend you could talk this through with who would know you and your boyfriend well enough?

I don't think you should dump your boyfriend straight away, but have a think if it's important to you to get out there and experiment with girls (it's OK to be bi-curious/bisexual/lesbian!) You aren't in any rush to do anything just yet, but if you're finding the relationship too constricting, then maybe it is time to break up.

Reply 5

EFG

This new found sexuality will delighten your boyfriend OP.

MFF threesomes!

Reply 6

Jinxy

Anonymous

I'm starting to find myself attracted to females.

I love my boyfriend but as the time goes on, im finding myself more excited by women.

This is exactly what I'm going through and how I feel. I actually made a post on here recently about the same thing.
I haven't talked to anyone that actually has to deal with this with a boyfriend. It's so difficult isn't it? :frown:

If you want someone to relate to, feel free to send me a message because I think it would help to chat to someone going through the same things. :smile:

I care for my boyfriend but I can't stop thinking about girls either. *sigh*

Reply 7

sorii_soriii

I didn't thought about finding someone who's feeling the same, I just started feeling things about a girl at my work place , I feel so wrong that I have a boyfriend (we have a 3 year relationship ) and I like her so much, I even imagine things like kissing her and my heart beats so fast when I see her or when I'm near her , I even bite my lip without realising, she is actually kinda boyish but when she wears tight pants it drives me crazy , I thought all this is wrong and weird for me, idk what to do.