My dad died and my friends ghosted me

My dad died in jan 2023 - I was 26 at the time.

My dad had cancer for three years and I was living in London at the time so I would have to travel back home very often to see him (I would want to).

My friends started not inviting me to events because I was never really around and when my dad died they messaged me around 3 months later saying they were sorry.

I had been friends with them for many years although in the lead up I got a new boyfriend and became quite dependant on him and spent a lot of time with him rather than seeing lots of friends. It's just how I coped.

I'm feeling a lot stronger lately and feel ready to go to things alone and go and see my friends again - without a cluttered brain.

I have seen other friends during this time but not this particular group.

I'm worried that they will be closer with other people now and I think they have bad mouthed me to others that I only see my boyfriend when really it was a coping mechanism/I was just at home with my family.

I feel anxious to see them again - not sure why though

Reply 1

karl pilkington

Do you really want to be friends with these people who weren't there for you when you were going through a very difficult time?

Reply 2

gjd800

Sadly this is really normal, and people will pull away because they don't know how to help you or even how to interact with you when you've had someone close terminally ill, die. There's no right answer here, you have to trust your gut.

Reply 3

xoxAngel_Kxox

They're not true friends if they behaved like that when things were so tough for you. Over time, you will make new friends who really do care for you, and that's the circle you want to be in.