i feel like im missing out

Im in year 13 and after alevels, the summer is so hyped up and seeing as all my friends are going to be 18, we were going to go travelling in Europe. I was so excited bc i generally love travelling and spending time with my friends so it seemed perfect.
I have 2 groups of friends, one of them were planning to do a simple week long holiday so i thought was nice. My parents said i couldn't go. So then i asked another group, and then we were planning to do interrailing. I asked my parents if i can go but they said that they hate the idea of hostels and they think i would hate the idea of interrailing as a whole. I feel like they are right but i love anything i do with friends so i feel like it wouldn't be bad. They didn't say a definite no but i can't see them saying yes either. btw im only asking my parents now bc we need to book tickets and stuff so its a tad cheaper.
So its a no from both.
Mum suggested reaching out to one friend and just do a 2 girls trip somewhere so i asked her but this time she said she was busy.
I just want to do something in summer to enjoy my life. I don't get massive FOMO but i just feel so upset when all my friends are going on these fun trips and bonding together while i have to sit at home in this boring country by myself - i'm not even exaggerating, im going to be all by myself, every single friend i have is going somewhere.
idk what im hoping to get out og this post, idk what advice people could give to me that would change this situation. I just wanted to do something fun before i go to university.

Reply 1

greentiger

14

You’ll be 18, do you really need their permission? If you have money can’t you book it yourself with your friends? I get their concerns but also at 18, it’s your choice and responsibility.

Reply 2

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by greentiger

You’ll be 18, do you really need their permission? If you have money can’t you book it yourself with your friends? I get their concerns but also at 18, it’s your choice and responsibility.

well i sort of do bc i don't have a job so i need some help with the money. idk how common it is for 18 year olds to just randomly dip and go on holiday without asking their parents but its certainly not common in my area. They've always been extremely strict but when they see me cooped up in my room for weeks on end, they just have a go at me for not going out even thought i asked and they said no. Thats just how they are

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

i don’t have much advice but all i can say is that you’re not alone!! i feel exactly the same i hate the fact i’m feeling jealous of other people travelling because it sounds bad but i am. but then if i were given the opportunity to go backpacking would i really want to do it?! or is it just because that’s what is expected of you at this age, i just keep telling myself when it’s the right time and i feel independent and confident enough i’ll do it and it won’t seem like a massive thing?!

Reply 4

Anonymous #3

Honestly, I can’t say much as I plan to go on a two-week holiday with my friends after A-levels. It might be a bit too late but if you tell your parents why you want to go, over time they might warm up to the idea. It is also great if you save up money for yourself. My friends and I booked two years in advance and have been saving up since.

Reply 5

miamcniven

10

Original post by Anonymous #1

Im in year 13 and after alevels, the summer is so hyped up and seeing as all my friends are going to be 18, we were going to go travelling in Europe. I was so excited bc i generally love travelling and spending time with my friends so it seemed perfect.
I have 2 groups of friends, one of them were planning to do a simple week long holiday so i thought was nice. My parents said i couldn't go. So then i asked another group, and then we were planning to do interrailing. I asked my parents if i can go but they said that they hate the idea of hostels and they think i would hate the idea of interrailing as a whole. I feel like they are right but i love anything i do with friends so i feel like it wouldn't be bad. They didn't say a definite no but i can't see them saying yes either. btw im only asking my parents now bc we need to book tickets and stuff so its a tad cheaper.
So its a no from both.
Mum suggested reaching out to one friend and just do a 2 girls trip somewhere so i asked her but this time she said she was busy.
I just want to do something in summer to enjoy my life. I don't get massive FOMO but i just feel so upset when all my friends are going on these fun trips and bonding together while i have to sit at home in this boring country by myself - i'm not even exaggerating, im going to be all by myself, every single friend i have is going somewhere.
idk what im hoping to get out og this post, idk what advice people could give to me that would change this situation. I just wanted to do something fun before i go to university.

I read your reply about not having a job so having to ask your parents to help you pay. If you’re still relying on them to give you money to do nice things then they do absolutely have a say in what you can do with their money. My advice would be to get a job as fast as you can. I can imagine your parents being quite frustrated having to pay for all of your expenses and I fear you won’t learn to be independent, especially not having a job at 18. I started working at 14 and have done ever since. If you had your own money your parents can’t tell you what you can and can’t do as you’re 18. After sixthform I went on a girls holiday to zante and didn’t even ask my parents before I booked it because I was an adult with my own money and they had no problem with it. In the nicest way possible you need to get a job and have your own responsibilities and own money or else you will continue to feel left out, and may even struggle to cope with the independence of uni.

i feel like im missing out

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