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Only been with one guy.... pros and cons?

Hey, this is going to sound a bit stupid but I just wanted other people's opinion on this type of thing.
Basically, I've only ever been with one guy- my boyfriend of 3 and a bit years. I've had other boyfriends etc but he's the only one I've ever slept with and same for him. We lost our virginities to each other when we were about 16. We're still very happy and content in our relationship and we have no plans to end it but we've openly spoken about the fact that we havent had any experience with anyone else. He doesnt seem to bothered about it (he said he'd like to know what it's like but would never consider breaking us up over it) and same for me- I'm totally content but I just have this niggling feeling that maybe I'm missing out and that it's better to be going out and having fun now instead of being with one person. I'm 18.
I just wondered what your opinions on it is? Either way, I'm definately not going to break up with him over it. Who knows where we'll be in however many years.
Is it really better to have experience with other people (and by this I mean mainly sleeping around) or would you prefer to be with one and only one person in your life?
As I mentioned before, I'm completely happy at the moment being with one person but I just wanted other people's opinions on that matter :smile:

Is it generally a bad idea to stay with one person whom you met at such a young age, or is it a good thing? Please let me know your answers!

Reply 1

Dreamy_whisper

7

I've only ever been with 1 guy, my ex of just over 2 years. Each others first kiss/time etc. Been single now for about 3 months and I haven't been with anyone else yet and don't intend on doing for a while. It doesn't bother me, things happen when they happen. I'm 18

Reply 2

brightxburns

14

You already have what other people (the ones who have had many relationships) are searching for. I think you are better off.

Reply 3

Drewski

19

AmberB

Is it generally a bad idea to stay with one person whom you met at such a young age, or is it a good thing? Please let me know your answers!

Firstly, these aren't answers, merely opinions.

Secondly, you're happy. What more could you ask for?

Reply 4

Charlybob

10

You were 16. It's been more than 3 years. You are 18...

Well ignoring the flawed timeline, if it's working for you both, why let it bother you? If the first person you find works well for you, you don't throw that away just to sleep with a few other people.

Reply 5

AmberB

OP

Charlybob

You were 16. It's been more than 3 years. You are 18...

Well ignoring the flawed timeline, if it's working for you both, why let it bother you? If the first person you find works well for you, you don't throw that away just to sleep with a few other people.

Sorry I meant that we've known each other for that long. As in friends. I started going out with him at 16. I just count it as one lol. I never keep up exactly when we started going out properly

Reply 6

Arielle

1

Pros - you always have someone there who knows you well and whom you can share your affection with.
Cons - If you split up later you might be in experienced and find it hard to be with other people.

Reply 7

Casserole

12

You don't get points for no. of sexual partners in the Game of Life, if that's what you're asking.

More partners != more experience

and it certainly doesn't equal a more fulfilling life. It's not like food, where having only one type will restrict your health - if you have sex with one partner your entire life, how is that hindering you in any way?

It's just that nowadays it's way more easier in choice and variety - doesn't mean you have to go along with it.

Reply 8

Darty

If it's just about sex, have you got any reason to complain about the current situation? If sex with him makes you happy, and he makes you happy, you've got no reason to even contemplate being with anyone else. I've only every slept with my current girlfriend, and I used to have the same "oh maybe I'm missing out"...but then I realised, I love her, and sex with her is fantastic, why would I want anything else?

Reply 9

AmberB

OP

Darty

If it's just about sex, have you got any reason to complain about the current situation? If sex with him makes you happy, and he makes you happy, you've got no reason to even contemplate being with anyone else. I've only every slept with my current girlfriend, and I used to have the same "oh maybe I'm missing out"...but then I realised, I love her, and sex with her is fantastic, why would I want anything else?

No my current situation, to me, is perfect. The sex is great and when I'm with him I can't imagine being with anyone else. I'm very happy but I was just thinking about the future etc.

I was just thinking from the point of view- is it better to have experience? and what other people's opinions were on that.
Thanks for the replies so far, keep them coming in because the more opinions given, the better :smile:

Reply 10

Drewski

19

AmberB

No my current situation, to me, is perfect. The sex is great and when I'm with him I can't imagine being with anyone else. I'm very happy but I was just thinking about the future etc.

I was just thinking from the point of view- is it better to have experience? and what other people's opinions were on that.
Thanks for the replies so far, keep them coming in because the more opinions given, the better :smile:

Not all experiences are good.

Reply 11

Darty

AmberB

No my current situation, to me, is perfect. The sex is great and when I'm with him I can't imagine being with anyone else. I'm very happy but I was just thinking about the future etc.

I was just thinking from the point of view- is it better to have experience? and what other people's opinions were on that.
Thanks for the replies so far, keep them coming in because the more opinions given, the better :smile:

I think from an emotional perspective, experience helps. It enables you to realise the type of guy/girl that is right for you, see whether you would work with a certain person etc. From a sexual point of view, if you have great sex with your boyfriend, and you've been having sex with him for years, i'm not quite sure how having sex with 10 different guys 10 times each is much different from having sex with 1 guy a 100 times. Just keep reading cosmo and mixing things up to compensate for the fact that you don't have 10 guys worth of input! Certainly don't worry about it, and there's no reason to think that if you DID split up, the fact that you've only had sex with 1 guy would disadvantage you. I think as far as most guys are concerned, the fact that you've only had sex with one guy is a bonus.

Reply 12

Howells

I don't think it's better to have experience - my parents got together when they were 15 and 17 and they're been married 27 years now :smile:

I have a great girlfriend at the moment and I wouldn't want to be with anyone else :smile:

Reply 13

Casserole

12

AmberB

I was just thinking from the point of view- is it better to have experience?

Experience for what? Is there some sort of job (beyond the obvious) where one of the qualifications is to have at least 10 different sexual partners?

If you're varying it up then you can pretty much experience the whole sex thing with one person just as you can with 100... unless you're curious into all the different shapes and sizes of the male anatomy.

Reply 14

meenu89

19

I have only ever had one boyfriend since I was 14 and we lost our virginities to each other on my 16th. I guess I have been spared for all the heart-aches that most of my friends have been through. I some-times wonder what it would be like if we were seperated but then I think it is much better this way!

Reply 15

death.drop

16

I'm going to be really annoying and say if you're happy together not having ever been with anyone else isn't going to matter at all.

but i'd rather not have only been with one person. not to have experienced a bit of variety, to see how good or different it can be would niggle away at me in a major way. (perhaps this comes from going from terrible, to a bit better and thinking it was the best thing on the planet, to absolutely mind blowing).

like you said, you never know what will happen in the future anyway.

Reply 16

Erradhadh

I'm the sort of person who'd feel limited; not that I can't stop, it's just it would annoy me to stop at, well, one.

However, I have no need to worry about that.

Reply 17

chaseside

I'm missing out and that it's better to be going out and having fun now instead of being with one person. I'm 18.

Well I'd agree with this.. At 18 you can get virtually any man you want, so i'd play the field while you can. At 40 you don't want to be considering 'what else'? .. cause your options will be fairly limited.

Reply 18

jumpinglunch

13

What if you play the field and never meet anyone that comes close to your current partner...

Reply 19

moshing-fairy

14

brightxburns

You already have what other people (the ones who have had many relationships) are searching for. I think you are better off.

good advice.
i've slept with two guys- (one i was with for nearly three years, other i'm with now ((year n few months)). and my b/f has only slept with me. but i can't imagine being with anyone but him and he feels the same.

he said to me, (when i questioned him about uni n girls), why would i want loads of one night stands that mean nothing when i'd lose everything (ie you, well me :P)
which i thought was v.v.v. sweet.
:biggrin:

. and sums up how i feel on the subject.

Only been with one guy.... pros and cons?

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