I'd be towards the back of the women's fields but not last I'd imagine. I'd be last by miles in the men's race. Too bad I'd probably need to run with the men.
When I was a teenager I used to have a fantasy of being Olympic 800m champ. David Rudisha basically lived my teenage dream. I haven't run the 800 properly competitively since I was about 20 though (I'm 26 now).
At my school sports day a few years ago, my friends and I (all awful at sports) had an alternative sports day including events like highest number of Pringles eaten in 30 seconds, fastest application of eyeliner etc, so I would love to take part in those, if they ever became official events
I loved the freedom I used to get from my bullies in high school when we used to do anything long distance as I was just so much better than them and had 15 minutes of blissfulness where I was on my own towards the front and they'd be pulling up the rear