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Anti-Bullying!

Hi, I've really wanted to start up an anti-bullying/bullying support thread for anyone who would like to discuss this issue or show your support for anti-bullying campaigns. It may be that you or a friend is being bullied and you would just like a bit of reassurance from others who have been or are in similar situations. It could be that you have been bullied in the past and would like to offer support to others or perhaps you would just like to add something you feel will be a positive contribution e.g some positive advise. REMEMBER TO KEEP EXPERIENCES CONFIDENTIAL WHEN TALKING ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.

Reply 1

Sbarron

I guess I will kick-start this thread then!
I was bullied every day I was growing up so I know exactly how much it can at you and isolate you. It can feel like such a lonely place to be in. Yes it broke me, it scarred me, and the torture I went through even put me in hospital several times but I have moved on from the past now, which I know will never leave me but the battle wounds I received have actually made me the person i am today. I feel that everything bad that ever happened to me in my life plus everything the bullies done to me has made me become more strong and independent than they could ever know. The fact i got through every second of pain and i'm finally on the other side means I know I can conquer just about anything life can throw at me! I also know that with the right support, others will be able to get through it too. I have learned not to let anyone put me down and hold me back again and that I can get back up from rock bottom time and time again when I have someone to fight for. The rest of my life is about the future now and the about one reason i am still here today and that is my beautiful daughter. I didn't get the support I so desperately needed but the one person who gave me a life back and a reason to fight on. Since having her I decided I would live for her, love her and protect her. and now because of what she has given me I can also live for myself!! Its taken time but this year i'm getting ready to start a completely new chapter in my life by starting child nursing to help as many children as i can have a better quality of life. I can finally say that i'm so excited for what the future holds. There has been plenty of time I never thought i'd still be here to even say that but thanks to the blessing of a child I received 8 years ago, I can now say it and say it proud. Let this be reassurance for anyone else who is going through bullying that there IS a light at the end of the tunnel you just need to look at what you DO have in your life and find something good to focus on. I hope anyone going through what I went through gets the right support from family, friends or professionals so they can conquer the bullies as soon as possible and regain confidence in themselves :smile:

It can be done!

(edited 10 years ago)

Reply 2

Kim_maria

I think this is a wonderful idea! Bullying is something many people (of all ages) go through- and some may not even recognise bullying for what it is.
Bullying now falls under the category of abuse. I have found that the word 'bullying' is thrown about so much that to some it looses its severity. On the other hand you use the term 'abuse' and people's ears prick up. Bullying is abuse.

I was targeted when I was younger and to an extent I still am. At Primary school it wasn't so bad as younger children are gifted in being able to see past differences and 'play' is first and foremost the foundations of friendship. It was secondary school where it all started.

Some people used to say I asked for it because I chose not to do/wear/listen/say to what others thought of as the 'right' thing. However I do not believe that being individual is cause for ridicule. It started with the usual name calling, lead onto things being thrown at me, I was spat at, tripped up, had my possessions destroyed, followed home and eventually was physically attacked by both males and females.

I left school over 6 years ago and to this day I cannot forgive those people who subjected me to that, however I am very proud to say that they did not deter me from being myself and doing what I bloody well wanted. I am still what some (now nicely) refer to as quirky and I love my life and who I am. I have 2 very close friends from school who have and always will be there for me.

I do run into some of the people who used to torment me and it amuses me greatly when I see the people they have turned out to be. Some have genuinely changed, others have built a beautifully fake mask to hide what they used to be like and the rest are still very much ********s.

My advice to anybody who is being bullied is to stay strong and true to yourself, life gets better and you will be accepted and allowed to bloom into the person you are meant to be. DON'T let the close and feeble minded influence you into changing who you are.

Reply 3

Sbarron

Firstly, I am sorry to hear about what happened to you but well done for continuing to be yourself regardless! Your advise is great so thankyou! :smile:

Secondly, you are correct in saying that bullying is a form of abuse and this doesn't necessarily mean it has to be physical. The emotional abuse suffered can have just as much if not more of an impact in the long run. The effects can be life long and indeed ruin peoples lives completely. It can have an effect on people in so many different ways. It can destroy confidence, self esteem, relationships, work, health, the list goes on. As you have said it can affect people of all ages and it can happen at school, at home, at work, on the bus etc. Fortunatly you did not experience bullying so much at primary school, however not all young children do see past differences whether this routes from their upbringing or their own insecurities. The cruel reality is that even very young children can bully and for me i experienced such cruleness from very early on in life and it continued constantly throughout my whole school life! I may be 27 but i remember many of the harsh experiences i encountered dating back to reception as if it were yesterday! :frown:

I feel that there needs to be much more awareness raised on the topic (from a young age) and it should be tackled in schools much more effectively. Pupils should be taught about the hard-hitting effects it has on others and be encouraged to understand the extent to which it can destroy lives. I have heard of schools which have invited people in to share their experiences of teenage pregnancies or ex offenders to speak about the reality of a life of crime etc, and I think this could be a fantastic and effective tool to apply to other areas such as bullying.