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MUSLIM GIRLS: At what age do you start thinking about marriage?

Be honest please, I think (Muslim) girls think about marriage before boys do as for a lot of Muslim girls the last chance to find their own partner is school/uni and then after that if they've failed to do so their parents would get them an arrange marriage.

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23
Original post by Anonymous
Be honest please, I think (Muslim) girls think about marriage before boys do as for a lot of Muslim girls the last chance to find their own partner is school/uni and then after that if they've failed to do so their parents would get them an arrange marriage.



Well, I havent thought about it yet like that. I am 19.
Reply 3
Original post by Anonymous
23

Isn't 23 regarded late? I mean if you START thinking about marriage at that age then you'd be 25 when you're married (or around that age).
About 21ish, ie after university.
The parents are probably thinking of suiters but of course she finds her own match.
If she doesn't then her parents recommend her someone, she meets him and says whether she likes him or not.
If she does find someone then they just meet the parents and get engaged.
you get married whenever your ready.

Its very stereotypical to think that Arranged Marriages are the only ways in which Muslims get married.
Majority of the people I know married in love.
Reply 5
Original post by Anonymous
About 21ish, ie after university.
The parents are probably thinking of suiters but of course she finds her own match.
If she doesn't then her parents recommend her someone, she meets him and says whether she likes him or not.
If she does find someone then they just meet the parents and get engaged.
you get married whenever your ready.

Its very stereotypical to think that Arranged Marriages are the only ways in which Muslims get married.
Majority of the people I know married in love.

But.. isn't it normally the guys family that would get in contact with the girls?
And getting married in 'love' is haraam.
I'm a Muslim guy and I think of marriage now and I'm 19 :K:
Reply 7
I got married at 17, me and my husband met in school and we thought why not. We have been married 3 years nearly. Ma sh Allah
I'm 17. Not thinking of marriage now at all. I'll start when I've graduated uni and I'll find my own husband
(edited 9 years ago)
err I'm a Muslim girl - almost 19 and I suppose I'm thinking about it. Wouldn't like to get married before I finish uni though :colondollar:
I have a couple of friends who are 18 and are married - love marriages of course. And a couple of who are engaged - engaged marriages though.
I haven't really thought of it, I just recently turned 19 but don't have any interest in marrying anytime soon. I want to focus on my degree and be able to provide for myself financially before thinking about marriage but maybe around 21, 22. Whenever my parents decide it's the right time I guess.
The ones i know get married at about 23/24.
I like that.
Get married young,look after the kids and the house and all that.
Once my life is stable: stable income, traveled the world, bought a house etc....I honestly don't want to get married until my late 20s, early 30s
Original post by Zamestaneh
I'm a Muslim guy and I think of marriage now and I'm 19 :K:

what are you going to do about it? have you told your parents? are you looking to find a wife soon?

Original post by itsRochana
I'm 17. Not thinking of marriage now at all. I'll start when I've graduated uni and I'll find my own husband

that sounds all well and good but once you see your friends getting married etc you'll want that as well I guess. I was also like I'll wait till I finish my degree but my view has changed. Maybe you're different idk.

Original post by Anonymous
err I'm a Muslim girl - almost 19 and I suppose I'm thinking about it. Wouldn't like to get married before I finish uni though :colondollar:


where would u like to find ur husband tho?

Original post by Safiya122
I have a couple of friends who are 18 and are married - love marriages of course. And a couple of who are engaged - engaged marriages though.
I haven't really thought of it, I just recently turned 19 but don't have any interest in marrying anytime soon. I want to focus on my degree and be able to provide for myself financially before thinking about marriage but maybe around 21, 22. Whenever my parents decide it's the right time I guess.

love marriages? as in they were going out for a while?

Original post by Demon Llama
Once my life is stable: stable income, traveled the world, bought a house etc....I honestly don't want to get married until my late 20s, early 30s

30s? wow thats far too late imo, not a lot of guys would be available.


also, heres a question to all of you:

why do you view arrange marriages wrong? if arrange marriages are done properly then surely its the best option, it reduces the haraam and marriage is a family thing within Islam, or at least our respective cultures.

When I mean by arrange marriage done properly this is what I mean:

Girls/Boys parent show them the respective people they have in mind, they meet up and talk (the girl and the boy) with family members being present, after a succession of talks, if the girl and boy are happy then they get engaged. If one party is not in mutual agreement then they move on.

Whats wrong with that^^?
I'm 17 atm and I intend to get married at 23/24.

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Original post by Anonymous

love marriages? as in they were going out for a while?




yes sadly.
Original post by Safiya122
yes sadly.

don't you think thats wrong? what do most of your muslim girls think of going out with a guy?
Original post by Anonymous
don't you think thats wrong? what do most of your muslim girls think of going out with a guy?


I did say sadly haha so yeah. But like end of the day a lot of my muslim friends do that. I mean i think the girls see it as like a future marriage thing but a lot of muslim guys just see it as fun.They don't really mature up until it's time for marriage
Original post by Anonymous
what are you going to do about it? have you told your parents? are you looking to find a wife soon?


that sounds all well and good but once you see your friends getting married etc you'll want that as well I guess. I was also like I'll wait till I finish my degree but my view has changed. Maybe you're different idk.



where would u like to find ur husband tho?


love marriages? as in they were going out for a while?


30s? wow thats far too late imo, not a lot of guys would be available.


also, heres a question to all of you:

why do you view arrange marriages wrong? if arrange marriages are done properly then surely its the best option, it reduces the haraam and marriage is a family thing within Islam, or at least our respective cultures.

When I mean by arrange marriage done properly this is what I mean:

Girls/Boys parent show them the respective people they have in mind, they meet up and talk (the girl and the boy) with family members being present, after a succession of talks, if the girl and boy are happy then they get engaged. If one party is not in mutual agreement then they move on.

Whats wrong with that^^?


Personally I wouldn't do an arranged marriage. I feel like getting married to someone is something that two people should decide on their own, and having an arranged marriage (to me, at least) feels like marrying a stranger, especially as you know nothing about them except from what you've been told by your parents.

I know a lot of people might say that they can get to know each other AFTER they get married, but I personally feel like it's better to know the person completely beforehand, like say a year or so. Input from parents is fine, however, as long as they're not completely calling the shots. That being said, if a person cannot find a suitable partner on their own, then I guess having an arranged marriage could be considered as a last resort.
Original post by Anonymous
what are you going to do about it? have you told your parents? are you looking to find a wife soon?


I'm a convert, my parents don't know, so I can't turn to them, and I can't really go for a love marriage with a pious person because a pious person would most likely not mix with guys all too much... Unless I can establish contacts with any Muslims (so they can help me out if anyone in their family/they know is seeking to get married), I humbly expect to die alone...
(edited 9 years ago)

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