I'll try summarise everything-
I live with my mum and sister. Dad works abroad - work is his life. We see him 2-3x a year. My mum hasn't worked since I was born.
5 years ago my mum went on an intensive course to learn to teach English part time. She wound up getting carted off to the mental hospital after a breakdown, was then diagnosed with bipolar.
That put an end to her attempts at restarting a career.
This year she split up with my dad after 20years of marriage over the phone. 1 month later she's found a boyfriend who spends about 2 days a week on average living at our house. She's still married to my dad. I admit I wasn't overly welcoming - he's a nice guy but I was just annoyed I saw his face more than my own dads, that's all.
Shes just so..... Stupid? She'll ask my dad if he's ok with it, he'll answer yes. She then thinks everything is working out absolutely fine when it obviously isn't.
They haven't been in love for years (and if I'm honest I've been anticipating their divorce for years-a bit of a relief it's finally happening ha) but all my dad has apart from a full paid house, is(was) my mum, me and my sister.
Her contribution to our income is apparently, getting lodgers and students. Which I would accept if they were actually consistent. The odd two weeker paying £200 total isn't income.
the house is never tidy, she never tidies unless it's absolutely necessary
so recently, the strain is huge. My dad tries not to say anything, but it's visible to the point I'm seriously worried. 11+ hour shifts every day is not ok. I hate it. I even considered skipping uni and going out there at 18 to help in his work. Until I realised that would shatter his dreams of his kids going to uni... So I'm off to uni next year, and my sister is 4yrs younger than me. That's another 8 years of funding.
me and my sister have tried bringing up the money issue various times but each time we've been accused of 'bullying' her (I do love being called a bully by my own mum it's so mood lifting), not appreciating her, never helping around the house, hurting her, she's 'put her life on hold' for us, and she storms off. And im worried about re-setting off the bipolar. So we stay relatively quiet if possible. But we're only human, and the arguments have got out of hand at least twice a month.
..
I guess it's the constant(daily) self victimising she does, the scrounging off two men (where she'll be in 10yrs I have no idea. I expect she's relying on me and my sister) and her giving up way too easily that's just doing my head in.
My god, I'm mid a levels and tried to get a part time job to which she disagreed and rang up my dad to force me not to. And then she has the audacity to tell me I do nothing?
(ignore typos it's rushed and it's late and I'm on my phone)
its not unnatural to have lost respect for my own mother this last year especially, is it? yes I feel mean and evil but..
Sorry for the essay, your thoughts?