Can't decide between universities and English courses...need help.
I'll try and simplify this.
Because I'm extremely shy, I'd like to go to an university away from home, so that I can force myself to gain social skills, which I'll need later in life - effectively 'forcing myself out of my shell', and also to gain some independence.
However, the universities that I applied for that are far away, offered me something different to what I applied for - don't get me wrong, they're the same subject but the courses don't appeal as much (I was offered English Linguistics instead of Literature)
On the other hand, I managed to get an offer to study my 'dream course' of English Lit with Creative Writing at a university near home. I feel privileged that they gave me the offer because I had to do an admissions test, and produce a portfolio, and also there was over 250 applicants for only 15 places. So I feel like the course is too good an opportunity to miss. But here's the catch, I would have to stay at home.
For background knowledge, the reason why my social skills are severely lacking is because I grew up in an extremely strict household, and my parents never let me play out with other children. I wasn't allowed to go to parties, and I never went anywhere other than school unaccompanied by my parents. Even on school mornings, they stood and watched me until the bell rang. I'm not going to say much more about this, but I'll add that there was some emotional abuse going on too. I was kind of waiting since I was 9 (now 17) until university came along so that I could get out of the house and be around people.
Ultimately, I have to choose now between doing my perfect course whilst staying somewhere I'd rather not be.
Or, doing a course I didn't particularly want to do, but finally getting some freedom that I've been waiting for for 8 years.
I'm stuck in Catch 22
Because I'm extremely shy, I'd like to go to an university away from home, so that I can force myself to gain social skills, which I'll need later in life - effectively 'forcing myself out of my shell', and also to gain some independence.
However, the universities that I applied for that are far away, offered me something different to what I applied for - don't get me wrong, they're the same subject but the courses don't appeal as much (I was offered English Linguistics instead of Literature)
On the other hand, I managed to get an offer to study my 'dream course' of English Lit with Creative Writing at a university near home. I feel privileged that they gave me the offer because I had to do an admissions test, and produce a portfolio, and also there was over 250 applicants for only 15 places. So I feel like the course is too good an opportunity to miss. But here's the catch, I would have to stay at home.
For background knowledge, the reason why my social skills are severely lacking is because I grew up in an extremely strict household, and my parents never let me play out with other children. I wasn't allowed to go to parties, and I never went anywhere other than school unaccompanied by my parents. Even on school mornings, they stood and watched me until the bell rang. I'm not going to say much more about this, but I'll add that there was some emotional abuse going on too. I was kind of waiting since I was 9 (now 17) until university came along so that I could get out of the house and be around people.
Ultimately, I have to choose now between doing my perfect course whilst staying somewhere I'd rather not be.
Or, doing a course I didn't particularly want to do, but finally getting some freedom that I've been waiting for for 8 years.
I'm stuck in Catch 22
Original post by Viridiana
Is there no way for you to get into student accommodation in this uni close by?
My parents are saying that I have to stay at home if I go to the close uni. Apparently student accommodation would waste money if it's close to home anyway.
Original post by Rainbell
My parents are saying that I have to stay at home if I go to the close uni. Apparently student accommodation would waste money if it's close to home anyway.
Can't you convince them in some way? Maybe you have a relative with whom you could share your concerns regarding your lack of social experiences and they could talk to your parents. You could always get a part time job to chip in with the costs if it's what you really want.
Original post by Rainbell
I'll try and simplify this.
Because I'm extremely shy, I'd like to go to an university away from home, so that I can force myself to gain social skills, which I'll need later in life - effectively 'forcing myself out of my shell', and also to gain some independence.
However, the universities that I applied for that are far away, offered me something different to what I applied for - don't get me wrong, they're the same subject but the courses don't appeal as much (I was offered English Linguistics instead of Literature)
On the other hand, I managed to get an offer to study my 'dream course' of English Lit with Creative Writing at a university near home. I feel privileged that they gave me the offer because I had to do an admissions test, and produce a portfolio, and also there was over 250 applicants for only 15 places. So I feel like the course is too good an opportunity to miss. But here's the catch, I would have to stay at home.
For background knowledge, the reason why my social skills are severely lacking is because I grew up in an extremely strict household, and my parents never let me play out with other children. I wasn't allowed to go to parties, and I never went anywhere other than school unaccompanied by my parents. Even on school mornings, they stood and watched me until the bell rang. I'm not going to say much more about this, but I'll add that there was some emotional abuse going on too. I was kind of waiting since I was 9 (now 17) until university came along so that I could get out of the house and be around people.
Ultimately, I have to choose now between doing my perfect course whilst staying somewhere I'd rather not be.
Or, doing a course I didn't particularly want to do, but finally getting some freedom that I've been waiting for for 8 years.
I'm stuck in Catch 22
Because I'm extremely shy, I'd like to go to an university away from home, so that I can force myself to gain social skills, which I'll need later in life - effectively 'forcing myself out of my shell', and also to gain some independence.
However, the universities that I applied for that are far away, offered me something different to what I applied for - don't get me wrong, they're the same subject but the courses don't appeal as much (I was offered English Linguistics instead of Literature)
On the other hand, I managed to get an offer to study my 'dream course' of English Lit with Creative Writing at a university near home. I feel privileged that they gave me the offer because I had to do an admissions test, and produce a portfolio, and also there was over 250 applicants for only 15 places. So I feel like the course is too good an opportunity to miss. But here's the catch, I would have to stay at home.
For background knowledge, the reason why my social skills are severely lacking is because I grew up in an extremely strict household, and my parents never let me play out with other children. I wasn't allowed to go to parties, and I never went anywhere other than school unaccompanied by my parents. Even on school mornings, they stood and watched me until the bell rang. I'm not going to say much more about this, but I'll add that there was some emotional abuse going on too. I was kind of waiting since I was 9 (now 17) until university came along so that I could get out of the house and be around people.
Ultimately, I have to choose now between doing my perfect course whilst staying somewhere I'd rather not be.
Or, doing a course I didn't particularly want to do, but finally getting some freedom that I've been waiting for for 8 years.
I'm stuck in Catch 22
My ex studied English Lit and, after a series of stints in supermarkets and general household stores, she's now working admin in an estate agents.
She's also a **** but I'm sure that isn't on account of the degree she took...
Original post by Viridiana
Can't you convince them in some way? Maybe you have a relative with whom you could share your concerns regarding your lack of social experiences and they could talk to your parents. You could always get a part time job to chip in with the costs if it's what you really want.
I wish I could, but I have no relatives that I can talk to. My brother is somehow a social genius, and none of my other relatives live in the UK.
I'm not allowed a job either. They keep saying that I have to study with no distractions - I'm not even allowed hobbies
but I still sneak in some hobby time when they're not there.Original post by Rainbell
I wish I could, but I have no relatives that I can talk to. My brother is somehow a social genius, and none of my other relatives live in the UK.
I'm not allowed a job either. They keep saying that I have to study with no distractions - I'm not even allowed hobbies but I still sneak in some hobby time when they're not there.
I'm not allowed a job either. They keep saying that I have to study with no distractions - I'm not even allowed hobbies
but I still sneak in some hobby time when they're not there.Maybe you could stay at home but get involved in a lot of societies etc? This way you'd spend a lot of time away from home and could also say that it helps your studies.
I mean you'll be 18 by the time you go to University. So legally, you can do whatever you want (within reason), which includes moving out without your parents permission. Whilst it'll be far from easy, why should you have to compromise on doing your dream course and socially developing in a way that you feel you need to, because your parents are being strict about it? There's no point going for the other course in my opinion, literature and linguistics are vastly different and fair enough if you enjoy linguistics but you said you preferred literature.
If you don't want to go against your parents, then there are always societies and things that you can join and meet new people in, but try and put yourself first. Make a decision that's going to make you happy because at the end of the day it's you who's going to university, not your parents.
If you don't want to go against your parents, then there are always societies and things that you can join and meet new people in, but try and put yourself first. Make a decision that's going to make you happy because at the end of the day it's you who's going to university, not your parents.
Tricky. I can understand why you are keen to move away. It's true that English Lit and Linguistics are very different but do none of your other choices include any element of literature or creative writing? Might there be optional modules you can choose? There will definitely be societies you can join which will help you to develop your writing, and there will probably be magazines or web sites you can send written contributions to as well, maybe supplementary lectures or workshops you can attend in addition to your 'official' studies. If there is one of the 'distant' unis that you have a preference for, maybe it would be worth investigating what else in on offer in addition to the degree itself. It might make the experience more attractive to you. In fact if you love English you might find you like Linguistics too. It's a fascinating subject so may be worth investigating further. Good luck with your choice and I hope you manage to 'make the break'.
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