Do I have the right to be upset?
My mum doesn’t let me go anywhere I’m literally 16 but when I was 13 I was allowed to go places. I don’t have bad grades, I’m not rude, I don’t even get in trouble at skl. But she wonders why I get upset when she says no every single time. The place where I want to go is 10 mins away from house whilst there’s people my age who do badly in school get into trouble and go places farr.
Yes.
But being upset won't make you any happier or change her mind.
I wasn't allowed out alone, even as an 18 year old.
But being upset won't make you any happier or change her mind.
I wasn't allowed out alone, even as an 18 year old.
If you were allowed out before and aren't now, the implication is you let her down in some way and can't be trusted. In her eyes anyway.
No.. it's lockdown.
Original post by StriderHort
If you were allowed out before and aren't now, the implication is you let her down in some way and can't be trusted. In her eyes anyway.
I haven’t done anything that’s the thing but thanks for answering.
Original post by georgeparapet
No.. it's lockdown.
She was saying no before lockdown and I was still 16
Original post by imogen_ga
Tbh your mum is your mum and she’s telling you no for a reason. Have you discussed this with her beyond “can I go?” “No” ?
She literally has no reason she just said I’m not allowed
Original post by londonmyst
Yes.
But being upset won't make you any happier or change her mind.
I wasn't allowed out alone, even as an 18 year old.
But being upset won't make you any happier or change her mind.
I wasn't allowed out alone, even as an 18 year old.
Oh gosh
Original post by learner38
My mum doesn’t let me go anywhere I’m literally 16 but when I was 13 I was allowed to go places. I don’t have bad grades, I’m not rude, I don’t even get in trouble at skl. But she wonders why I get upset when she says no every single time. The place where I want to go is 10 mins away from house whilst there’s people my age who do badly in school get into trouble and go places farr.
You ALWAYS have the right to be upset. Your emotions are your emotions and you never need to apologise or validate why you're feeling a certain way. In this instance, I'd talk to your mum. Don't bring up how other people get to go places (she'll respond with something about how other kids do dr*gs or something like that). Try telling her how you're growing up, you're mature and how she's taught you how to be safe. She's most likely worried for your safety so having an argument with her about it and appearing upset will make her think youre 'immature' (it doesn't mean you're immature though, being upset is completely understandable). Talk to her constructively and tell her why you want to go and ensure her that you'll be safe, offer to message her every so often (I used to message my mum once every half an hour). Obviously I don't know what your relationship is like with your mum in detail so this advice is to be taken with caution as always, I wish you the best and please feel free to message me
Original post by learner38
My mum doesn’t let me go anywhere I’m literally 16 but when I was 13 I was allowed to go places. I don’t have bad grades, I’m not rude, I don’t even get in trouble at skl. But she wonders why I get upset when she says no every single time. The place where I want to go is 10 mins away from house whilst there’s people my age who do badly in school get into trouble and go places farr.
Sounds like my Mum! I was fuming at the time and thought she was so harsh for not letting me do what I wanted.
Now I'm a bit older now and I understand why she didn't let me do what I wanted.
Original post by georgeparapet
No.. it's lockdown.
and?
Original post by Anonymous
She was saying no before lockdown and I was still 16
Is this op?
I'm just abit younger than you and my mum doesn't let me go out like I see my other mates going out. I can't go far, I have to tell her where I'm going etc. I've just always known that she knows what's best for me and she wants me to be safe.
Original post by Teigan182
You ALWAYS have the right to be upset. Your emotions are your emotions and you never need to apologise or validate why you're feeling a certain way. In this instance, I'd talk to your mum. Don't bring up how other people get to go places (she'll respond with something about how other kids do dr*gs or something like that). Try telling her how you're growing up, you're mature and how she's taught you how to be safe. She's most likely worried for your safety so having an argument with her about it and appearing upset will make her think youre 'immature' (it doesn't mean you're immature though, being upset is completely understandable). Talk to her constructively and tell her why you want to go and ensure her that you'll be safe, offer to message her every so often (I used to message my mum once every half an hour). Obviously I don't know what your relationship is like with your mum in detail so this advice is to be taken with caution as always, I wish you the best and please feel free to message me
Thank you soo much I will try this. I try to not seem upset so I will follow your advice
Original post by Anonymous
She literally has no reason she just said I’m not allowed
Maybe it is to do with the people you are hanging out with. I’d they are a bad influence, that’s probably why she doesn’t want you to go out with them.
There must be a reason why she suddenly stopped letting you go out; sit down with her and try to have a mature conversation about it, see if you can understand why she's saying no.
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