Was this actual sexual assault or am I being dramatic?
So tw, obviously. This is all very confusing since I don’t remember when it started I just know it happened.
Around the time I was 7, 8 or 9, i made a joke around my cousin of how if we did play dates as mom (her) and dad (me) we should be intimate with each other. This might seem strange but as a kid with full internet access and open parents, I did already know what sex was. Mind you this was all a joke, we laughed it off and continued playing as if she was the mom and I were the dad.
After that, I don’t remember when, she started saying that we should in fact do it, since I was curious I said ok. I didn’t like it. It was only dry humping, no overly sexual stuff, but I didn’t like and asked her to stop. She stopped, but every single play date after she would bring it up and stranddle me and kissing my neck.
I made it obvious that I didn’t like it the first few times, but it came to a point where I knew I couldn’t do anything about it, I couldn’t convince her otherwise. I also didn’t tell my parents for two reasons:
1. I was embarrassed.
2. She said I would ruin the fun and that I was being childish.
So this dry humping went on until I was 12 or 13 where I started saying no again. At first she would convince me I was being dumb and childish and a drama queen. After a few more play dates I made I stop for good. I would force her out of my lap and make my best as to not be alone with her.
It’s been a couple of years since, I still wonder if i was a victim or if I was really just being dramatic.
I still flinch anytime someone slightly touches my breasts, as she used to caress them all the time and get panic attacks over the thought of her.
I hate my cousin with all my forces.
And yes, I know that normally when a child abuses another child they themselves are being abused, but I truly couldn’t care less. This has affected every aspect of my life. My self view, my friendships, i over sexualise myself, etc etc etc.
I just want someone to tell me if I am being over dramatic or if I should really work on this through therapy (in which I already am).
Around the time I was 7, 8 or 9, i made a joke around my cousin of how if we did play dates as mom (her) and dad (me) we should be intimate with each other. This might seem strange but as a kid with full internet access and open parents, I did already know what sex was. Mind you this was all a joke, we laughed it off and continued playing as if she was the mom and I were the dad.
After that, I don’t remember when, she started saying that we should in fact do it, since I was curious I said ok. I didn’t like it. It was only dry humping, no overly sexual stuff, but I didn’t like and asked her to stop. She stopped, but every single play date after she would bring it up and stranddle me and kissing my neck.
I made it obvious that I didn’t like it the first few times, but it came to a point where I knew I couldn’t do anything about it, I couldn’t convince her otherwise. I also didn’t tell my parents for two reasons:
1. I was embarrassed.
2. She said I would ruin the fun and that I was being childish.
So this dry humping went on until I was 12 or 13 where I started saying no again. At first she would convince me I was being dumb and childish and a drama queen. After a few more play dates I made I stop for good. I would force her out of my lap and make my best as to not be alone with her.
It’s been a couple of years since, I still wonder if i was a victim or if I was really just being dramatic.
I still flinch anytime someone slightly touches my breasts, as she used to caress them all the time and get panic attacks over the thought of her.
I hate my cousin with all my forces.
And yes, I know that normally when a child abuses another child they themselves are being abused, but I truly couldn’t care less. This has affected every aspect of my life. My self view, my friendships, i over sexualise myself, etc etc etc.
I just want someone to tell me if I am being over dramatic or if I should really work on this through therapy (in which I already am).
you were a child, you didn’t have the capacity to provide informed consent, and they, as adults, should have known this. yes this is sexual harassment/assault. even if you did say yes, it would be SA / harassment, because you were a child, you can’t consent fully until you’re 16 or over, depending on where you live and the laws of the place
I'm so sorry to hear about this. Yes, this is most definitely sexual assault: to quote, 'unwanted touching or any sexual acts without consent' are under the class of sexual assault. You're definitely not overreacting and please don't let anyone tell you so, so I hope you continue to work with it via therapy and that it all goes well: it's definitely important to do that. Best of luck, remember there are people that are here for you.
Original post by Anonymous
So tw, obviously. This is all very confusing since I don’t remember when it started I just know it happened.
Around the time I was 7, 8 or 9, i made a joke around my cousin of how if we did play dates as mom (her) and dad (me) we should be intimate with each other. This might seem strange but as a kid with full internet access and open parents, I did already know what sex was. Mind you this was all a joke, we laughed it off and continued playing as if she was the mom and I were the dad.
After that, I don’t remember when, she started saying that we should in fact do it, since I was curious I said ok. I didn’t like it. It was only dry humping, no overly sexual stuff, but I didn’t like and asked her to stop. She stopped, but every single play date after she would bring it up and stranddle me and kissing my neck.
I made it obvious that I didn’t like it the first few times, but it came to a point where I knew I couldn’t do anything about it, I couldn’t convince her otherwise. I also didn’t tell my parents for two reasons:
1. I was embarrassed.
2. She said I would ruin the fun and that I was being childish.
So this dry humping went on until I was 12 or 13 where I started saying no again. At first she would convince me I was being dumb and childish and a drama queen. After a few more play dates I made I stop for good. I would force her out of my lap and make my best as to not be alone with her.
It’s been a couple of years since, I still wonder if i was a victim or if I was really just being dramatic.
I still flinch anytime someone slightly touches my breasts, as she used to caress them all the time and get panic attacks over the thought of her.
I hate my cousin with all my forces.
And yes, I know that normally when a child abuses another child they themselves are being abused, but I truly couldn’t care less. This has affected every aspect of my life. My self view, my friendships, i over sexualise myself, etc etc etc.
I just want someone to tell me if I am being over dramatic or if I should really work on this through therapy (in which I already am).
Around the time I was 7, 8 or 9, i made a joke around my cousin of how if we did play dates as mom (her) and dad (me) we should be intimate with each other. This might seem strange but as a kid with full internet access and open parents, I did already know what sex was. Mind you this was all a joke, we laughed it off and continued playing as if she was the mom and I were the dad.
After that, I don’t remember when, she started saying that we should in fact do it, since I was curious I said ok. I didn’t like it. It was only dry humping, no overly sexual stuff, but I didn’t like and asked her to stop. She stopped, but every single play date after she would bring it up and stranddle me and kissing my neck.
I made it obvious that I didn’t like it the first few times, but it came to a point where I knew I couldn’t do anything about it, I couldn’t convince her otherwise. I also didn’t tell my parents for two reasons:
1. I was embarrassed.
2. She said I would ruin the fun and that I was being childish.
So this dry humping went on until I was 12 or 13 where I started saying no again. At first she would convince me I was being dumb and childish and a drama queen. After a few more play dates I made I stop for good. I would force her out of my lap and make my best as to not be alone with her.
It’s been a couple of years since, I still wonder if i was a victim or if I was really just being dramatic.
I still flinch anytime someone slightly touches my breasts, as she used to caress them all the time and get panic attacks over the thought of her.
I hate my cousin with all my forces.
And yes, I know that normally when a child abuses another child they themselves are being abused, but I truly couldn’t care less. This has affected every aspect of my life. My self view, my friendships, i over sexualise myself, etc etc etc.
I just want someone to tell me if I am being over dramatic or if I should really work on this through therapy (in which I already am).
Hi,
Sorry you are going through this.
Just reaching out to you as I wanted to let you know there is support available out there that may be of use.
You may wish to reach out to:
- Victim Support
https://www.victimsupport.org.uk/
Get in touch anytime for independent, free, and confidential advice:
Call Supportline on 08 08 16 89 111
- NSPCC
Please call the NSPCC Helpline on 0808 800 5000 or email [email protected]. Please note that you still have the option to request anonymity via call or emails.
- Childline
Childline is free to contact on 0800 1111. Childline counsellors are here to take calls 24 hours a day, 7 days a week from children and young people under 19. Childline counsellors are also available to speak to online through 1-2-1 chat and via email.
I hope this is of use.
Please look after yourself.
Best wishes,
TSR Support
Quick Reply
Related discussions
- Drugs and Sexual Assaults
- Am I a lesbian or just traumatised?
- Students accused of rape at university bringing lawyers to hearings
- Does Warwick still have a rape culture?
- Is it sexual assault if..
- Warwick university
- Participants needed!!
- Is it alright if my boyfriend slaps me?
- Uni accom flat m8 fartin’ 😩😂🍑💨
- Getting taken advantage of while sleeping
- Does this count as sexual harassment?
- Relationship Advice
- Enhanced dbs checks
- Should I tell my bf ?
- relationships
- Boyfriend constantly touches me
- I reported my old teacher for sexual abuse and I don’t know how to feel about it.
- What would you do in my position?
- Peterhouse vs Trinity Hall
- Does my straight married colleage like me? Or is she harrasing me?
Latest
Trending
Last reply 5 days ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.Last reply 5 days ago
Just found out about UCL stat test but can't afford to sit itLast reply 2 weeks ago
Dad keeps criticising my university degree choiceLast reply 3 weeks ago
Is this pathetic or genuinely something to be upset aboutTrending
Last reply 5 days ago
My friend might be getting extra time and i hate it.Last reply 5 days ago
Just found out about UCL stat test but can't afford to sit itLast reply 2 weeks ago
Dad keeps criticising my university degree choiceLast reply 3 weeks ago
Is this pathetic or genuinely something to be upset about
