Dating as a Trans Person

Hi

Does anyone have lived experience of dating as a trans person? I'm slowly going through the process of socially transitioning and want to date when I start uni.

Any advice would be great

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Original post by Anonymous

Hi

Does anyone have lived experience of dating as a trans person? I'm slowly going through the process of socially transitioning and want to date when I start uni.

Any advice would be great

The best place to perhaps meet people is to join some LGBT societies at university or perhaps download some LGBT dating apps.Another idea, is to perhaps join some clubs that you generally would be interested in e.g Debate society or whatever your interests are as you have a higher chance of meeting somebody who has interests that correlate with your own.

I will be completely honest, I'm actually transgender myself and have Asperger's too. I would like to give dating a go myself but I am worried about being rejected every time because I'm Transgender.
I have socially transitioned but I'm often very closeted and not out to people.

Reply 2

1582

Volunteer Team

If you pass then, as detrimental as this might sound: be upfront. You are not expected to out yourself from the very first sentence, but it is important to let potential romantic partners know early enough that they don't feel misled. Accept that some people will decide they do not wish to pursue things further with you after disclosing it, and that this doesn't make them transphobic. I met my ex on Tinder and she told me she was trans after I asked if we could move things off the app - that was after about 48hrs of non-stop chatting. She was pre-op and I went home with her on the first date, so I appreciated that she told me as soon as she did. I doubt drunk!1582 would have handled that surprise as well otherwise.

Not exactly the same, but I'm non-binary. I've found it important to be upfront about this because it turned out to be a dealbreaker for one of my exes and it hurt like hell when they broke-up with me over it. I hadn't intentionally hid it I thought as a long-term friend they already knew. 🤷

tl;dr - it is better for both you and them to be honest early on. In the long run you're less likely to be hurt this way, even if it might feel like you're limiting your options.