how to tell if a guy only likes you for sex

So i've had sexual relations with this guy like a year ago we were like friends who were attracted to each other but were never in a relationship or exclusive. 3 days ago I saw him again in a birthday party. Hes popped up again after no contact. His messages are like really slow and he's asked to catch up over drinks. What do you think his intentions are?

Reply 1

Anonymous #2

Did you connect emotionally or this was all physical? If on an emotional level, then its more than just sex.

Literally impossible to say with any certainty. You were friends with benefits before, so it may be that he's looking for no strings sex again. It may be he isn't, and genuinely does want to catch up. Either way there is no way of knowing until you actually see him, and either ask him or he makes his intentions clear. If those intentions align with yours, then great. If not, then walk away. It is worth noting, though, that most people have sex with people that they like, both physically and to spend time with. It's very unlikely that he 'likes you for sex' and doesn't also actually like spending time with you. What's important is that what you want in that respect is the same as what he wants. There is nothing wrong with two people spending time together and having sex but not actually having a relationship outside of that. It doesn't mean he's using you, or disrespects you, or doesn't like you. It just means you're two people having casual sex, and that's fine. But that's not what you want anymore and it's still what he wants, just don't do it. If you're unsure what he wants, ask him, being aware of course that it's hardly unheard of for men to lie about that sort of thing to get sex, but it will at least give you something to go off and I'd hope that you can spot a lie given that you do already know him. But communication is important if you're sleeping with someone even if you're not in a relationship with them. So if you're not sure whether you both want the same things, talk to him about it.

Reply 3

withlove.ym

7

Original post by Anonymous #1

So i've had sexual relations with this guy like a year ago we were like friends who were attracted to each other but were never in a relationship or exclusive. 3 days ago I saw him again in a birthday party. Hes popped up again after no contact. His messages are like really slow and he's asked to catch up over drinks. What do you think his intentions are?

maybe that you should ask him what his intentions are ? if you are comfortable with him being interested in you just for sex, than it's okay. But if not, remember to always respect your body, and put yourself first^^

Reply 4

Admit-One

Universities Forum Helper

21

If it’s literally been the best part of a year with no contact then he’s more than likely after FWB, but the only way you find out these things is by interacting with them rather than having people who don’t know either of you guess.

Reply 5

Hey Lyla Girl

8

Original post by Anonymous #1

So i've had sexual relations with this guy like a year ago we were like friends who were attracted to each other but were never in a relationship or exclusive. 3 days ago I saw him again in a birthday party. Hes popped up again after no contact. His messages are like really slow and he's asked to catch up over drinks. What do you think his intentions are?

He only wants sex

Reply 6

Little pecker

20

That will be just about every man so should be easy

Reply 7

Zarek

21

I would trust your instincts on this one, but you could try asking as well

Reply 8

NonIndigenous

20

Conversations with most guys who are only interested in sex, tend to be shallow. They tend to talk about themselves a lot as well. And they often make up things to seem more impressive. I've had a few guy friends like that. We don't talk much these days.

Some of those types of guys are a little more astute than that and know how to have deeper conversations / pretend they are interested in you, when in fact they only care about the sex.

And some have an avoidant attachment style, which makes it seem like after you've had sex that they no longer want to be with you. This is very different, and often misinterpreted as him only being interested in sex.

how to tell if a guy only likes you for sex

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