Should I tell him the real reason I don't yet want sex?

I've been seeing a guy for a few weeks and we've really hit it off. However, I've recently had a couple of bad expériences where things seemed to be going well with a boy, we slept together, and then he ended it. Therefore, even though I feel things with this boy are different, and he assures me he's not just interested for the sex, I'm stil a bit cautious. I've told him I'm cautious but not the reason why; should I make reference to my past expériences? I don't want him to think I'm some crazy, insecure girl, but then I think the honesty might make him feel less 'hurt' when I say I don't yet feel ready.

Any thoughts appreciated.

Tell him. It's win win:

- He gets offended and leaves ... Not worth your time, saves you the effort

- He's understanding and stays ... found a winner

Or

He lies to get into her bed.

Tell him. It's win win:

- He gets offended and leaves ... Not worth your time, saves you the effort

- He's understanding and stays ... found a winner

How is that an option? OP has already made it clear she won't have sex yet.

And it wouldn't put you off if a girl told you she had had bad expriences?

Or

He lies to get into her bed.

Your not going to escape this unless you take a leap of faith.

He's not a machine he does actually react to these responses. He can easily choose to fake his sympathy to sleep with her.

Not if I liked her enough.

But where has OP even suggested she would be willing to sleep with him if he showed sympathy? Surely by showing sympathy it will reinforce the point to OP that it is ok NOT to sleep with him..

Guy might see it as an oppurtunity to look noble so he can sleep with her after.... Your assumption is not everyone is a sleazeball.

I was in a similar position feeling very cautious about sex, although my reasons were different. Anyway, he pestered me about it a lot until I told the guy my reasons, however he still persisted, we fought and broke it off, although I was heart-broken at the time, actually I realise now a few months on, he wasn't worth it, I'm worth more than sex! You are too!

As has been said before, if they're a decent guy they'll stick around and be understanding, if not then they're not worth the time or effort... xx

But she still isnt going to sleep with him and so OP is no worse off than if she had just never mentioned it.

What if his answer changes her opinion of him, and that the guy thinks this to.

What if his answer changes her opinion of him, and that the guy thinks this to.

I don't think your hypothesises are helping the situation XD

I suspect that if her opinion of him would change her attitude to having sex so soon.. we wouldn't be having this conversation to begin with.

So true, thank you! As one of my friends and another poster in this thread says, if he's nice enough/likes me enough he'll stick around anyway (and then I won't have 'lost' anything).