Am I allowed to move into halls without parents permission?

Er, because it doesn't

I'm awaiting a source in the Quran or at the very least a reliable hadith. Emphasis on reliable.

Ok so basically, my parents are strict muslims and I made the stupid decision of actually listening to them when applying to unis

I've decided that enough is enough I'm old enough to make my own decisions.

So, instead of moving in with mu aunts I've decided that I'm going to move into the uni halls.

There's a chance my parents wont support me through it though. I don't know if its a stupid decision

Plus, I was thinking of working my butt off now. Then calling up unis on results day that have a better course.

I dunno. What do you guys think?

It's like talking to a brick wall, they won't listen to me. It's a definite no




I've tried and my mum always says " I'll get a flat and live with you there" -__- what is even more frustrating is that my brother is living in halls. Its only cause I'm a girl. Thanks for that. I'll check that out

If it doesn't, then why do Muslims (including those in the UK) insist on the "girls being protected"?

One of my most annoying University experiences; the Asian kids using the library as a social area because they weren't allowed to go to coffee shops or pubs or HORROR OF HORRORS mix with members of the other sex.

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My parents where actually born here shocking I know.

Yep, but they may cancel my student finance application. I'm entitled to the maximum grant and hopefully if I get the top grade then I'll be entitled to the education grant by the uni. I applied to the halls last week. Just waiting for them to get back to me.

The reason they dont want me to go is cause they love me and they want to protect me. Silly really, according to them I'm only allowed to move out once I'm married. So they won't be responsible..

The amount of times I've spoke to them. They just dont wna listen.. Whatever I say doesnt make a difference. But I need to be calm and mature. I'll just tell them my decision

It's aston uni, I really do like it. I think it wont hinder me(hopefully not). But I didnt have a choice, I couldnt put unis further away cause I wasnt allowed and the ones nearer home wanted A*'s for my course. I do regret listening to them. Since they have influenced my future.

I dont have a local imam that theyll listen too. Also, my brother might disagree. He might act like the over protective older brother and won't let me go.

Anyway, you don't think its stupid for me to move into uni halls when I can stay at my aunties house. Which will be closer and cheaper?

I still want to move into the halls, just sick of listening to them

Thanks for the help

Then why does Islam state that a woman must have a male guardian at all times?

Two things:

1. The burden of proof is on you. If you're going to make the statement that "Islam states that a woman must have a male guardian at all times", as previously said, you must provide a Quranic verse or a reliable hadith. Otherwise I will treat it as the nonsense that it is.

2. Your statement just isn't true. Plenty of Muslim women are independent, or otherwise act outside of their husband's control. Including my mum Of those who do ascribe to this school of thought (and I'll admit there there are families who do), it is almost always cultural hegemony.

What the hel is the hadith?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women's_rights_in_Saudi_Arabia#Male_guardian

Explain why certain families use religion as the reason why they are not allowed to do normal things, e.g. move out to a university?

Just do it. Move into halls. Get away from your parents. If it was up to my mother, I would be going to uni in my home city and living at home so she can fetch me everyday after lectures. Parents from certain cultures tend to be backward and controlling; if they wanted you to behave like a priest/nun then maybe they shouldn't have brought you up in the UK. If they don't want you to be a part of the society which you were brought up in then they are insane. My mother tries to scare me by saying how I'll probably be raped at university. You just have to remember that while they fear for your safety, it is not in a normal way, it is irrational and controlling and about them wanting to keep their reputation intact. Go have fun, live your life and become independent like the thousands of other students who's parents are supportive and normal.

I definitely won't be returning home over the holidays. I don't plan on living at home ever again after leaving, some parents like mine think they own their child forever and the only way for that culture to change is for new generations to stand up and break the mold. Don't let them guilt trip you either.

Try getting onto a better course if you want to. Otherwise I would say just go do the course that you've been accepted onto already. I was in the same situation, listening to my parents and I ended up taking 2 gap years. I've only realised this year that my mother was really glad that I was still at home where she could control me. She even told me again that I can reject my place and resit A levels AGAIN. Madness. You can always do post-grad studies. It's only 3 years.

Exactly what my mum says. She won't do it. Tell her to do one.

My parents are exactly the same. It has nothing to do with Islam. My parents are Indian Hindus and are coming up with all the same reasons as your parents, including that girls need to be 'protected'. It has nothing to do with religion, everything to do with culture. It's just the fact they need you to remain a virgin so their ego and family reputation remains intact.

If he does this I guarantee it's because he's doing everything your parents don't want him to do at uni. If he had self control then he would know that you can too.

Oh my.. you sound so similar to me its scary :/ I have already resitted a year, so I dont wanna waste another year choosing a better uni

If you dont mind me asking, how did you manage to break away. My parents have threatened me with soo many things. Some very ridiculose. I cant just pack my stuff and go?

Also, I've discussed the whole independence thing with my mum and she said I'll be leading my own life in the uni. My aunt(who I'll have to stay with) wont drop me off. All I'll miss is the late nights and clubbing.

Is living in halls really that good? Cause I know I'll push the boundaries with my family that I'm going to move in with and not have them treat me like a child.

Thats the collectivist culture for you, its a shame that they think there doing me good

Oh my.. you sound so similar to me its scary :/ I have already resitted a year, so I dont wanna waste another year choosing a better uni

If you dont mind me asking, how did you manage to break away. My parents have threatened me with soo many things. Some very ridiculose. I cant just pack my stuff and go?

Also, I've discussed the whole independence thing with my mum and she said I'll be leading my own life in the uni. My aunt(who I'll have to stay with) wont drop me off. All I'll miss is the late nights and clubbing.

Is living in halls really that good? Cause I know I'll push the boundaries with my family that I'm going to move in with and not have them treat me like a child.


I know its silly

Thats the collectivist culture for you, its a shame that they think there doing me good



Loool I never thought of that. Apparently he's going 'to knock some sense in me'
I'll remember to say that

Thank you

I feel sorry for me too But I'm not brainwashed. I'm defo not listening anymore. Had enough

But my mum is pretty strict herself. She'll be even stricter if I'm somewhere else. Cause then it wont look good to the rest of the family

I told my mum, and she doesnt want me living in halls. She started emotionally blackmailing me saying I dont love her and never have and how I dont give a f*** about my family.

I don't know what to do

Good idea but she isnt going to listen.. She thinks I just want my freedom to go out and party(that's not completely true)

your lucky, my dad wont even let me go uni