How do I get myself through this humiliation?

x

You're only 19, you'll get over it, all you need is time. I'd wager most people have felt this way at one time or another, the one thing you have to remember is your relationship is over for a reason.

Although, from personal experience, you have absolutely no right to judge him, you're too blame too and did sleep around afterwards and just 'cause he got over you doesn't mean he is a bad guy. Tbh, and this doesn't get said enough - if you aint over him, you're the one with the problem, not him. Remember that and you'll fine OP

I made it very clear that I wasn't labeling myself as morally superior or him as morally wrong. At what point did I judge him? But that doesn't make it any easier. I think the idea of a 'rebound' is quite common in people who have just got out of a relationship. Romantic holidays with a new guy... not so common. Of course it is within his rights to do it, but that doesn't make it any easier for me.

And I quote: "I'm sickened"
Rebounds come a variety of ways, a rebound is still a rebound.

Like I said, it takes time, and you seem to do be doing the 'normal' things: getting drunk and sleeping around, which helps me in getting over someone. Only other thing I can suggest is cutting him out of your life, it'll help you get over him easier.

Yeah the feeling of sickness is pretty common when you see someone you love with someone else. It does not imply that I think he was morally wrong in what he did. I don't cut people out who've done a lot for me. He is leaving the country soon but I hope to stay in contact with him.

Not usually when you've been sleeping around, but fair enough, everyone's different.

I don't know why he would stay in contact with you. You sound like a dick tbh. You broke up with him numerous times due to "issues with his age and English was his second language" whatever the hell that means and then begged him back when you regretted it. Then he started to realise he didn't want to be with you because you have anger issues and dumps you. After you guys break up, you tell him about you sleeping around and drinking. He finds someone who he (presumably) likes enough to go on romantic dates with and all of a sudden his angry ex starts calling him hurtful things and explodes at him.

If I was him I'd stay the hell away from you.

How do I get over this?

It sounds to me that you have acted a bit immaturely. This can happen to all of us.
I would apologise to him for your behaviour and wish him all the best in his life and then cut him out of your life.
If you don't you're only going to humiliate yourself more by chasing him.
If he's gonna go back to his homecountry that is even easier to cut him out. Honestly you don't need to keep in contact with everyone... You're gonna have a difficult time to get over it, but that is common with break ups.
Easiest way to get over someone is by not having contact Work on those issues you have so that in the future it won't happen again.

But how do I come to terms with him just preferring someone else to me? Surely that will affect me later on anyway, even if I meet someone else I like. It'll always be in my mind that I'm not good enough.

But how do I come to terms with him just preferring someone else to me? Surely that will affect me later on anyway, even if I meet someone else I like. It'll always be in my mind that I'm not good enough.