friendships with the opposite sex when in a relationship..

It's not so much being friends with them, it's spending time alone with them. It's odd if your gf spends time alone with other guys when she could be with you. Just like it would be odd if your bf spent time with other girls alone when he could be with you.

While agree with the other posts saying it is fine, I feel that I must point out that if you spend more time with these male friends than you do with your bf, he has a reason to feel insecure.

thanks for your opinions. it seems that the girls feel its fine but the guys only think its fine in certain situations e.g if the girl is unable to spend time with her boyfriend. he is not controlling he tends to put the guilt trip on and thinks that all the guys are after me when they clearly are not!its interesting to get an unbiased outside point of view!

Oh really? In my experience girls aren't the best at being able to tell if a guy is after them. I rather think a guy is better at seeing such things from a guys point of view. Even if the guys aren't actively pursuing you, you can bet your bottom dollar they think about it from time to time which your b/f knows and it prolly makes him uncomfortable. True story.

Again, I think this is a case of females massively underestimating the male sex drive. Plus, usually, if a guy gets half he'll do something about it.

Again, I think this is a case of females massively underestimating the male sex drive. Plus, usually, if a guy gets half he'll do something about it.

A couple of drinks and you'll see most guys true colours.

oh, an btw,

Male sex drive > Female sex drive

But you'd have to be a guy to truly understand that.

no to have a balanced view you would have t have tried both and i very much doubt you have lol.

and what would be the point in having mates if you didnt trust them to look after you when you were drunk? mine have on occasion told me i have had quite enough to drink, given me water and hauled me off to bed *in a totally non sexual way*. my god the way you talk you'd think all men are total ****wits.

A couple of drinks and you'll see most guys true colours.

oh, an btw,

Male sex drive > Female sex drive

But you'd have to be a guy to truly understand that.

do i have too much faith in men thinking that you can actually be JUST friends with them and not have to worry about any form of intimacy? or am i giving them too much credit here..

do i have too much faith in men thinking that you can actually be JUST friends with them and not have to worry about any form of intimacy? or am i giving them too much credit here..

Of course it doesn't go for EVERY male and yes I'm generalising becuse some dont actually have the confidence to go for it and spend their time hangin round with girls and some are just effeminate.

Again, I think this is a case of females massively underestimating the male sex drive. Plus, usually, if a guy gets half he'll do something about it.

So? Even if a guy is pathetic enough to let his sex drive override a friendship and make a move on an attached female friend, doesn't mean that she's going to respond! So what if a male friend occasionally thinks what it would be like to have sex with you? That doesn't mean that the girl in question is immediately going to ditch her man for some loser who doesn't realise the boundaries there are.

I think it is possible to take platonic friendships too far while in a relationship - if they're really tactile ones, or if you'd see particular male friends in preference to your boyfriend. But in any normal situation, most people have mixed-sex friendship groups and why should that change if they're in a relationship?