Help! I've fallen for my young uni lecturer!

I am in my final year at university and ever since day one/first year I have been strongly infatuated with a PhD student and lecturer who has been teaching me subjects every year and who now is my dissertation supervisor! He is just 4 years older than me (we are both in our early 20s) and I see him weekly at university. We got very personal (common thing at British universities) and he slipped into our conversations the fact that he's got a girlfriend (whom I found on social media).
I can't bear and bury my feeling anymore. every supervisory meeting makes me want to jump off the window. And the thought of leaving uni in a few months' time and not seeing him ever again drives me mad already.
I know there can't be anything between us because he's in a relationship and also because he's marking my papers, but what can I do to erase him from my memory?

Reply 1

Safiya122

15

oh change supervisors?

Reply 2

Sollom

2

Original post by rri14

I am in my final year at university and ever since day one/first year I have been strongly infatuated with a PhD student and lecturer who has been teaching me subjects every year and who now is my dissertation supervisor! He is just 4 years older than me (we are both in our early 20s) and I see him weekly at university. We got very personal (common thing at British universities) and he slipped into our conversations the fact that he's got a girlfriend (whom I found on social media).
I can't bear and bury my feeling anymore. every supervisory meeting makes me want to jump off the window. And the thought of leaving uni in a few months' time and not seeing him ever again drives me mad already.
I know there can't be anything between us because he's in a relationship and also because he's marking my papers, but what can I do to erase him from my memory?

Ah it's complicated. .. are you sure it's something more than infatuation ? I was infatuated with a guy but when he said he's not interested. I cried the whole two weeks later realised that he was not important and I wasted my time. . Make sure that your feelings are strong.

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Reply 3

Morrisseya

10

Find someone closer to your age :biggrin:

Reply 4

The Juan

Original post by rri14

I am in my final year at university and ever since day one/first year I have been strongly infatuated with a PhD student and lecturer who has been teaching me subjects every year and who now is my dissertation supervisor! He is just 4 years older than me (we are both in our early 20s) and I see him weekly at university. We got very personal (common thing at British universities) and he slipped into our conversations the fact that he's got a girlfriend (whom I found on social media).
I can't bear and bury my feeling anymore. every supervisory meeting makes me want to jump off the window. And the thought of leaving uni in a few months' time and not seeing him ever again drives me mad already.
I know there can't be anything between us because he's in a relationship and also because he's marking my papers, but what can I do to erase him from my memory?

You only live once and you don't want to live with regret. Coming from a male the fact he dropped that he had a girlfriend is a sign he really likes you. He is trying to convince himself he doesn't like you, it is a common move. Clearly he wants you and you want him- the only thing preventing you to is your preference of professionalism above personal feelings. Your young and will regret it if you don't. You will never see him again soon and you would of missed an easy move. Just go in for the kiss when you are both alone and follow on from there. Good luck.

Reply 5

username1661963

12

Just wait for a couple months until you are going to be leaving (like 2 weeks), then confess, if it doesn't work out you won't have to suffer seeing him again, and if it does...

Reply 6

username1670433

OP

6

Original post by Safiya122

oh change supervisors?

I can't! because he's the only one in uni with the expertise in my area of writing (probably the reason why I chose my topic - so as to secure him as supervisor. bad mistake now) :frown:

Reply 7

HotCoco.

17

There are university rules against lecturers having relationship with students. He already has a girlfriend. I think it's best to keep these feelings to yourself to prevent any awkwardness or tension. Especially as he would mark your paper. You'll gain nothing from telling him how you feel and it sounds like lust more than anything real. Don't make things worst for yourself and concentrate on other things.

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Reply 8

username1670433

OP

6

Original post by Morrisseya

Find someone closer to your age :biggrin:

my best friend is 20 and she's dating a 35yo !! I'm 21 and this guy is 25! :confused:

Reply 9

Safiya122

15

Original post by rri14

I can't! because he's the only one in uni with the expertise in my area of writing (probably the reason why I chose my topic - so as to secure him as supervisor. bad mistake now) :frown:

don't have one?

Reply 10