Insecure about the fact that I'm not white :(

I'm a south Asian girl and I notice so many guys around me (including many south Asian guys) who have white girlfriends. It just seems like the preference is to have a gf who is white and girls of other ethnicities come second, or that only when guys don't have the option of getting a white gf do they settle with girls of other ethnicities.

Obviously I can't change my skin color and ethnic facial features, but neither can I change the fact appearance is the thing that guys look at first (even though personality comes into play after that) and what they are willing to commit to i.e. having a girl that actually satisfies their preferences in looks if they're going to be with her for a long term thing.

I can't help but feel that some guys settle for a non-white gf and wait to 'upgrade' to a white gf later. I don't want to be someones temporary, 'she'll-do-for-now' type thing, I wanna be the main meal :/

Reply 1

Syrianprince

13

Honestly you got nothing to worry about, im white and im with a south asian girl that is slightly tanned. I understand you as her parents are the typical type and always believe white people are superior. Why do south asisns care so much?.

Reply 2

Buchladen

4

I'm a white girl and reading how you feel makes me sad. I have such a wide range of friends, male and female and from my experience you will meet men who have a preference for oriental , black , Indian , white girls etc. Moreover, many men who see an attractive girl of any race will be interested.

Reply 3

quentinhamilton

15

You shouldn't feel inferior because of the colour of your skin; I'm sure many would want a naturally tanned skin.

Reply 4

glo420

9

Original post by Syrianprince

Honestly you got nothing to worry about, im white and im with a south asian girl that is slightly tanned. I understand you as her parents are the typical type and always believe white people are superior. Why do south asisns care so much?.

Doesn't really make a difference when you're Syrian and Turkish dating a South asian

Reply 5

Syrianprince

13

Original post by glo420

Doesn't really make a difference when you're Syrian and Turkish dating a South asian

How do you mean?

Reply 6

Evangelion

8

Original post by Anonymous

I'm a south Asian girl and I notice so many guys around me (including many south Asian guys) who have white girlfriends. It just seems like the preference is to have a gf who is white and girls of other ethnicities come second, or that only when guys don't have the option of getting a white gf do they settle with girls of other ethnicities.

Obviously I can't change my skin color and ethnic facial features, but neither can I change the fact appearance is the thing that guys look at first (even though personality comes into play after that) and what they are willing to commit to i.e. having a girl that actually satisfies their preferences in looks if they're going to be with her for a long term thing.

I can't help but feel that some guys settle for a non-white gf and wait to 'upgrade' to a white gf later. I don't want to be someones temporary, 'she'll-do-for-now' type thing, I wanna be the main meal :/

I have friends that would actually prefer a south Asian girlfriend, not everyone wants just a white gf. I'm indifferent, if she was pretty (in my eyes) and we got on then that's all that matters to me!

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by Evangelion

I have friends that would actually prefer a south Asian girlfriend, not everyone wants just a white gf. I'm indifferent, if she was pretty (in my eyes) and we got on then that's all that matters to me!

Out of curiosity what ethnicities are they and you?

Reply 8

ComputerMaths97

17

Original post by Anonymous

I'm a south Asian girl and I notice so many guys around me (including many south Asian guys) who have white girlfriends. It just seems like the preference is to have a gf who is white and girls of other ethnicities come second, or that only when guys don't have the option of getting a white gf do they settle with girls of other ethnicities.

Obviously I can't change my skin color and ethnic facial features, but neither can I change the fact appearance is the thing that guys look at first (even though personality comes into play after that) and what they are willing to commit to i.e. having a girl that actually satisfies their preferences in looks if they're going to be with her for a long term thing.

I can't help but feel that some guys settle for a non-white gf and wait to 'upgrade' to a white gf later. I don't want to be someones temporary, 'she'll-do-for-now' type thing, I wanna be the main meal :/

Whatttttttttttttt are you on about??

Race has literally nothing to do with anything, the only reason you see mostly white girls that are in relationships is because frankly, as you'd expect, most girls are white. Seriously, everyone has their preferences, stop worrying.

You're someone's main meal, just wait to see who's :P

Reply 9

Evangelion

8

Original post by Anonymous

Out of curiosity what ethnicities are they and you?

White british.

Reply 10

Zechs

14

I think at some point you will just need to grow up.

It's as if guys can't date white girls these days because someone's going to feel bad, someone's always going to feel bad. It's really no one else's responsibility how you feel. I thought it was only the south Asian guys who had such problems I see it's a bigger problem now.

(edited 8 years ago)

Reply 11

MrKmas508

12

Matey this is kinda pathetic cut it out, ur beautiful fam.

Reply 12

Sweet n Sour

3

Original post by Anonymous

I'm a south Asian girl and I

Woof, thought you were gonna say black

.

Anyway

Original post by Anonymous

and I notice so many guys around me (including many south Asian guys) who have white girlfriends. It just seems like the preference is to have a gf who is white and girls of other ethnicities come second, or that only when guys don't have the option of getting a white gf do they settle with girls of other ethnicities.

Ok read, enough, justified conflict, but not within yourself should you have the conflict. Ever. As you said you cannot choose this. It's not...an affliction to be brown just because people choose to inflict pain on someone for being brown :console:

. Take issue not with you...take issue with them. :indiff:

Reply 13

thecatwithnohat

20

If you don't believe you're beautiful, then who else will?

It's hard to convince others if you're in doubt yourself.

There are many guys out there who have a preference for South Asian girls, and some are even colour-blind when it comes to attraction. Skin colour isn't the be all or nothing.

Reply 14

RayApparently

21

Tragic to read though I do feel your fears are unfounded. I think this is just the sort of insecurity you eventually have to get over and grow out of.

Spoiler

Reply 15

donutaud15

22

It's the insecurity that's making you unattractive. Be confident.

Seriously relationship (most of the time) has nothing to do with colour. I'm speaking as an Asian girl married to a white guy

Posted from TSR Mobile

Reply 16

Anonymous #1

OP

Original post by RayApparently

Tragic to read though I do feel your fears are unfounded. I think this is just the sort of insecurity you eventually have to get over and grow out of.

Spoiler

Fears are unfounded or aren't unfounded ? :s-smilie: