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Rejecting someone to live with?

Hi,

I am a first year uni student and I got into an awkward situation. I was meant to live next year with a guy on my course, his girlfriend and his girlfriend's best friend. We have found a house around October-November time and sorted all the paperwork. Recently the guy from my course disappeared for like a week, at first he didn't attend lectures. Then he deactivated his Facebook account and I couldn't reach him on his phone. We had a pair project upcoming which we haven't even started so I had to find him asap. I had to message all the people who know him to ask if they know anything about where he is. Nobody knew anything. I was so pissed off.
Finally I got an answer from his girlfriend saying that they broke up. I then asked her what's going to happen with the house. She said she doesn't know as she is waiting for her application for a year abroad. That was just shocking and I was even more pissed off. First of all, because I knew nothing about anyone going on a year abroad. If I knew this I wouldn't signed up to live in the house in the first place. Secondly - the guy disappeared and didn't inform me about the situation. And thirdly because I got put into this kind of **** situation.
Carrying on with the story... I was super pissed off, I talked to few other friends and everyone was saying that it's alright I still have time to sort my housing. I posted a couple of posts on Facebook that I'm looking for a room. Then I randomly got a message from the guy on Facebook with a phone number saying that I should contact him there. I texted him and we started chatting about all this ****. He was repeating to me that the house will be okay and if we will need to fill an extra room he will take care of it. We met the next day to plan our pair project and he was telling me the same ****, that it's all okay blah blah. He said that I should worry about my room and that's it. He said he will stay in a house, and his ex girlfriend's best friend is staying too. I told him that I need to think about this, because I want everything to be sorted because I leave uni for summer because I'm going on a very long trip and I will not be able to do this ****.
I just felt like a total **** after this whole thing. To me it's not just the room and not just the house, but it's the people I'm living with as well. And if the people are hiding things like this from me then I cannot respect any of them.
I mentioned that I posted that I'm looking for the house. Apparently the guy and his ex saw that. I got quite a few requests from people I know who need to fill an extra room. Two request were from people who I get on really well. Now I have a dilemma. I am thinking whether I should run away from all the crap with my current house, play safe and go to live with people I know well and get on well. But then the thing is, how do I tell the guy I was meant to live with about this? We still have to work on a pair project for a week and I want to sort it out as soon as possible. If I delay I might not get to live with the people who need an extra person. I can bet if I will tell that guy how I feel and what I want to do he will not take in the right way and we will never get on anymore. The it will be really awkward during lectures/seminars/coursework, etc. and it will influence my study life negatively.
I don't know what to do to be honest. Do I stick with the same house, with people I don't know, or do I ditch them and go for someone I know and never had problems with?

Reply 1

Anonymous #1

Also I forgot to mention that the house has 4 bedrooms. 2 of them are kind of medium/double size, one is very large double and one is box room. The guy was meant to stay in box room and his ex in the large double. It would be fair for a couple, everyone was happy about that. But as now there is no couple any more, the guy will definitely not be able to live in the box room. I know how much stuff he has got and there is absolutely no way he would fit it there. If he would choose to live in the large double then it is impossible at all to find anyone to live in that box room. This is one of the reasons why I am worried that this will not go anywhere.