Is she cheating on me?

So i'm talking to this girl I met on Tinder, we're dating, she's an international student from a wealthy Middle Eastern country (won't say which for privacy reasons) and we both have similar personalities, so things have been going well. She also slept with me on the first date which I did not expect.
However today I called her for a casual conversation (I'm away rn), and she just tells me she's currently invited her 'friend' over to her room, who is a guy. She said it like it was nothing and expected me to not care. I talked to the guy, and they were literally both in her room alone at night. She insists they're just friends, but I really don't believe that now.

This is the second time this has happened.

Thoughts?

Reply 1

LukasHuber

2

There’s no such thing as a man-woman friendship, and you should consider it and make a decision.

Reply 2

Anonymous #2

There's a bit more to unpick here, but the first thing is - it's only really cheating if she is definitely in a relationship with you. Are you sure you are definitely both on the same terms - that she is in fact definitely your girlfriend? 'Girl you slept with on a first date from Tinder' sounds like it could be more in the hookup zone unless you have specifically agreed you're exclusive - have you?

I would also say there absolutely is such a thing as male-female friendships - but if the two of you are dating/exclusive, it's not really 'proper' for her to invite someone into her room at night without your knowledge even if nothing happened. It's a bit of a red flag either way.

Reply 3

Good Advice

3

If she is going to sleep with you on the first date, it is clear to to say she is most likely sleeping with other men. It is also a red flag when bringing another guy over to the house and her saying it is nothing; a man and woman friendship can not work out. Every instance this occurs, they are more than just friends and it seems very secretive to have him over and be in private. Also, she is not thinking about you in this situation and how it would appear to have another man in the house whilst you are there. There will probably be other comments that will say you are "insecure", but you are correct to assume this in this situation. So to answer your question, if you are officially boyfriend and girlfriend then she is most likely cheating on you.

Reply 4

Doomotron

18

Original post by Anonymous

So i'm talking to this girl I met on Tinder, we're dating, she's an international student from a wealthy Middle Eastern country (won't say which for privacy reasons) and we both have similar personalities, so things have been going well. She also slept with me on the first date which I did not expect.
However today I called her for a casual conversation (I'm away rn), and she just tells me she's currently invited her 'friend' over to her room, who is a guy. She said it like it was nothing and expected me to not care. I talked to the guy, and they were literally both in her room alone at night. She insists they're just friends, but I really don't believe that now.

This is the second time this has happened.

Thoughts?

Do you know if the man the most recent time is the same one as the first time or a different person? Either way, it might not be a good sign. I'm not going to say she absolutely is sleeping with them, but if I was in your position I'd think something fishy was going on too.

Reply 5

Alaska_Bear_25

15

Original post by Anonymous

So i'm talking to this girl I met on Tinder, we're dating, she's an international student from a wealthy Middle Eastern country (won't say which for privacy reasons) and we both have similar personalities, so things have been going well. She also slept with me on the first date which I did not expect.
However today I called her for a casual conversation (I'm away rn), and she just tells me she's currently invited her 'friend' over to her room, who is a guy. She said it like it was nothing and expected me to not care. I talked to the guy, and they were literally both in her room alone at night. She insists they're just friends, but I really don't believe that now.

This is the second time this has happened.

Thoughts?

Yea might just be me but this reeks of insecurity to me so far. Firstly, are you sure you both are dating, in the way we're at right now with the world, you could go on dates with someone but not be dating them and it is something to confirm - that you are in a relationship together, and that is exclusive.
A guy and a girl can just be friends and hang out with each other 'alone, together' all night in a room and not have anything stir up between them, it is possible - he could be gay, they could be sexually not interested in each other and just friends, they might just have an emotional connection? they could just be talking, she might have known him longer than you? Second thing to ask her being if they are just friends, because you were wondering and connect that to your first point on wanting an exclusive relationship. Then again, how long have you known her? It might just catch her off guard because she wants to get to know you and move slow.

Reply 6

Anonymous #1

OP

You guys are right, thanks for your advice. I think I'm just going to stop talking to her.

Reply 7

Dunnig Kruger

16

If she was worth sleeping with in the first place, I personally would tolerate her sleeping with others in this context.

With my tolerance being one thing that would set me apart from most guys.
I'd take proper STI precautions.
And I'd look to blow all the other guys out of her heart. Not by doing anything out of the ordinary, but by spending enough time with her to allow her to get to know the real me. If we did part I'd look to make it on the friendliest terms possible.

There's no way I'd ghost her. That's not how I treat people that I've shared an amazing and intimate adventure with.

Is she cheating on me?

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