What is wrong with me?

I am incapable of getting a partner- I was at uni for a whole year, I’ve left now, having a year out- anyway. A whole year of being somewhere new and I could not get a relationship of any sort going and I am entirely to blame. It’s not that I didn’t have chances to get laid/ get a partner but the sheer lack of experience with romantic partners that held me back.

I have had 100s of matches of apps- I never get dates and always say the wrong thing. My friends don’t understand it either it’s as though I’m doomed with saying stuff that gives other people the ick. I either talk too much or not enough- people approach me at bars- I panic and don’t seem interested even though I am…I’m so fed up! I can attract people but they never stick around. So it’s obviously something I’m doing? I don’t even think I seem desperate but maybe I do. I try not to be, it seems when I put in the least effort they’re more interested but that just isn’t me- I’m not a laid back person who likes to play games I’d much rather meet someone serious who likes the same stuff as me.

I’m only 20 but my sisters all have found someone and are married (they’re much older than me but even so).
Tbf I only had my first kiss at 19 so I’m a very late bloomer- maybe I will be with relationships too. It’s just frustrating that I don’t have the skills to say what I mean/ what’s expected to make someone still interested. I know I shouldn’t stress but I worry about giving up because I’m a hopeful person.

Any advice, thanks

Reply 1

taylor2317

Life & Style Forum Helper

Relationships aren't easy - they take a lot of work! Because of this, the majority of first relationships are doomed to fail, as it takes a lot of time and work to "train yourself" to be with somebody else.

I would recommend alerting potential partners of your concerns. Make sure this is in a way that effectively relays your concerns, but do not overly focus on this as you do not want to come across as "needy".

Hope this helps,

- Taylor :heart: