I do not know if I am the problem

So , I would really appreciate some advice regarding my situation . I have severe depression atm and am currently on 1st year of medical school . I am flunking a lot , whereas I used to be a straight A student at my high school ( got into an exam with 0.33% acceptance rate , for instance ) . I keep telling myself that it will get better , and I do envision working in a hospital with pleasure , but I wonder if it is possible to enjoy your profession even if you hated the university course it took you to get there . Please , forgive my english , as it is not my first language . In all honesty , I chose medicine because it is a prestigious profession with high earnings (family pressure) , but never liked the idea of it when I was younger . I used to dream of becoming a judge or working at an office . So , do you think I can still like being a doctor ?

I've seen many people who hate the university they go to and / or their course, yet still adore their job later on. Remember - this course is meant to teach you about the career, not having you do it yet. Considering this is your first year, try to remember that the majority of your course is theory-based on purpose - it is crucial you know key facts (e.g. human anatomy, etc.) before even attempting anything remotely like what would actually happen in a medical profession. It may sound daunting (especially with your depression), but try talking to people taking the same course - see if they also feel let down or disappointed as this is not what they expected from their course.

However, it is possible that a career in medicine is not what you want. Please do think about whether you can see yourself enjoying being a medical professional for the next 30+ years. If you think no, then I would recommend dropping out of your course, or else you will be wasting money on a course and future job that you will hate. Whilst you may like this career now (although with some reservations), it is fairly likely that these reservations will grow as time progresses and you find yourself bored of and hating the career you have chosen.

TLDR: I think it is important for you to consider if this is the job you can happily do for decades to come. Speak to peers, see how they feel about the course. If you find this course isn't for you, try to leave the course ASAP in order to prevent wasting money on your course.

Hope this helps, and my dm's are open if you ever want to talk...

- Taylor

(P.S. your English was great here - it was easy to understand what you meant here! Don't doubt yourself: I'm sure you're much better than you think you are )

Are you getting any help with your depression? It is likely to be affecting your performance and enjoyment of your course quite a bit.

Thanks a lot for responding , black tea . I have been changing medications recently ... hoping that they will work . I wish you the best in life , thanks again .🌻🌻

Wow , thank you Taylor , really , for taking your time to respond to my message . I would be lying if I said I am not relieved to hear that . All my classmates seem to be thriving so far , and so I was beggining to question my degree choice . I am extremely thankful for the reply , you seem a wonderful person ! I am hoping you encounter more and more success in your life 🌻 .