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My lecturer thinks I'm Depressed?

I've started my final year of uni recently and have started a new job at the same time, it's been really stressful especially with other personal things going on too - despite all this I've been managing all my assignments and work really well.

I had a meeting with my personal tutor about my dissertation, this was the second meeting and in my first meeting I did mention I was kinda unwell. I was a bit confused though because he kept asking probing questions about my wellbeing without being too direct - and when I made a joke about the bad weather he told me to 'try stay positive, we'll get through this.' We were later talking about an issue with the dissertation and I misunderstood something and called myself silly at the funny mistake I'd made but even then he started really defending me and saying it was okay even after I brushed off the mistake.

What really got to me was at the end of the meeting when he said;

'I hope you feel better soon... you should go outside more'

I don't know if it was the stress of everything, but those words just broke me and I ended up in tears. Luckily the meeting was online and my camera was off but I really had to strain myself and quietly responded with 'I'll be fine'.

I'm really confused as to why he said that and whilst I appreciate the concern(?) now I feel awkward for the next meeting, even though nothing wrong was said from either of us.
Original post by Anonymous
I've started my final year of uni recently and have started a new job at the same time, it's been really stressful especially with other personal things going on too - despite all this I've been managing all my assignments and work really well.

I had a meeting with my personal tutor about my dissertation, this was the second meeting and in my first meeting I did mention I was kinda unwell. I was a bit confused though because he kept asking probing questions about my wellbeing without being too direct - and when I made a joke about the bad weather he told me to 'try stay positive, we'll get through this.' We were later talking about an issue with the dissertation and I misunderstood something and called myself silly at the funny mistake I'd made but even then he started really defending me and saying it was okay even after I brushed off the mistake.

What really got to me was at the end of the meeting when he said;

'I hope you feel better soon... you should go outside more'

I don't know if it was the stress of everything, but those words just broke me and I ended up in tears. Luckily the meeting was online and my camera was off but I really had to strain myself and quietly responded with 'I'll be fine'.

I'm really confused as to why he said that and whilst I appreciate the concern(?) now I feel awkward for the next meeting, even though nothing wrong was said from either of us.

Hey,

Your situation with starting a new job and third year at the same time does sound like a stressful one! From what you have said I think your dissertation supervisor was trying to be supportive and kind, although it my not have come across in the correct way perhaps. He may have realised that you were feeling stressed balancing everything and just wanted to support you, I am sure he had the best intentions and you really shouldn't feel embarrassed at all.

I am sure you are doing so well and it is honestly so impressive that you are balancing third year with a new job! I would defiantly recommend you chat to the wellbeing team at your university. I think sometimes just speaking things through with someone really helps, especially when you're feeling overwhelmed. It might be that they are able to help you to balance things better as well as give you advice in terms of how to cope when you're feeling overwhelmed with coping strategies.

I completely understand that it can feel awkward and overwhelming to talk about your mental health but the wellbeing team are there to support you when you are struggling and they are not going to judge you for feeling overwhelmed - it is completely understandable! It may just be that it takes some time to get into your new routine with working and being back at university.

I hope this is helpful and good luck with the rest of your year!

Katie - Third year Psychology student
Original post by Anonymous
I've started my final year of uni recently and have started a new job at the same time, it's been really stressful especially with other personal things going on too - despite all this I've been managing all my assignments and work really well.

I had a meeting with my personal tutor about my dissertation, this was the second meeting and in my first meeting I did mention I was kinda unwell. I was a bit confused though because he kept asking probing questions about my wellbeing without being too direct - and when I made a joke about the bad weather he told me to 'try stay positive, we'll get through this.' We were later talking about an issue with the dissertation and I misunderstood something and called myself silly at the funny mistake I'd made but even then he started really defending me and saying it was okay even after I brushed off the mistake.

What really got to me was at the end of the meeting when he said;

'I hope you feel better soon... you should go outside more'

I don't know if it was the stress of everything, but those words just broke me and I ended up in tears. Luckily the meeting was online and my camera was off but I really had to strain myself and quietly responded with 'I'll be fine'.

I'm really confused as to why he said that and whilst I appreciate the concern(?) now I feel awkward for the next meeting, even though nothing wrong was said from either of us.


Anon,

How do you feel about your wellbeing?

You say that you are managing well with work and studies, but perhaps you do feel frustrated about not having as much free time as you would like.
It's okay to be honest with yourself/others about things which you are finding difficult or a challenge. This doesn't mean that you have to share everything, but you can share some things. Your personal tutor/ supervisor are there to support you and help you during your time at university. There are concerned not only for you academic life but also for your wellbeing.

You might have been tearful because of hormones or just because of tiredness. Do try and give yourself time to rest, so that you can take a break from your work and studies.

All the best,

Oluwatosin 3rd year student University of Huddersfield

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