I feel like im invisible

Hi guys,
I'm not seeking pity.

I'm 23 years old living in London
I'm a Black guy
6 ft 2
Slim with a little belly
Never had a relationship before ( it's not because im a f boy, because i'm not)

I'm a nice guy, clean,

I dont ask creepy questions to women or are pushy and invade personal space.

But, i feel like walking down the street, all young women my age group (18-24) they look past me like im not even there.

Its incredibly frustrating;

Any other guys in big cities had similar experiences?

Reply 1

Ackhnologia

13

Original post by LukeEkezie

Hi guys,
I'm not seeking pity.

I'm 23 years old living in London
I'm a Black guy
6 ft 2
Slim with a little belly
Never had a relationship before ( it's not because im a f boy, because i'm not)

I'm a nice guy, clean,

I dont ask creepy questions to women or are pushy and invade personal space.

But, i feel like walking down the street, all young women my age group (18-24) they look past me like im not even there.

Its incredibly frustrating;

Any other guys in big cities had similar experiences?

This is the average male experience
Unfortunately
I am sorry that it makes sad

Reply 2

unaccountable-re

2

Maybe join groups with similar interests to you to make friends

Reply 3

Surnia

20

My family, friends and I met our partners through school, hobbies and work. Same for neighbours and acquaintances. I don't personally know anyone who met their date walking down a street...

Reply 4

Old Skool Freak

20

Original post by LukeEkezie

Hi guys,
I'm not seeking pity.

I'm 23 years old living in London
I'm a Black guy
6 ft 2
Slim with a little belly
Never had a relationship before ( it's not because im a f boy, because i'm not)

I'm a nice guy, clean,

I dont ask creepy questions to women or are pushy and invade personal space.

But, i feel like walking down the street, all young women my age group (18-24) they look past me like im not even there.

Its incredibly frustrating;

Any other guys in big cities had similar experiences?

Hi, another black guy here (if that helps at all). This post probably won't solve all your problems, but it should hopefully give you a few things to think about.

Be honest here, are you definitely not getting any attention from anyone at all, or are you specifically interested in white / non-black girls? I'm not saying this to be judgemental (whoever you find attractive is your own business), but it's known that the majority of people are typically attracted to their own race. Based on that, provided your face isn't physically repulsive (and you're not acting odd / weird), I would have expected (at least some) other black girls to give you some attention (maybe not the "Shaniqua's", but I'm sure you know there are a variety of black-girl "types" (as there are in all races). After all, you're young and 6'2" is a fairly decent height (you'll make a lot of users here jealous with that lol).

On the other hand, if, say, you're interested in white girls, then I can see how / why you may be having problems... as I said earlier, the majority of people tend to be naturally drawn to their own race. Yes, there are some white girls who (really) like black guys... but from my experience, they tend to be attracted to some kind of well known black stereotype. The 4 main ones in the western world tend to be:-

1) The Roughneck:- (e.g. gangster / thug types... this includes the rude-boy / roadman types)
2) The Smooth Operator:- (those very smooth, charming, laidback easy-going guys, who get on with just about everyone)
3) The Athlete / Dancer:- Heavily into fitness... and they have an amazing body to prove it
4) The Joker:- Those clown /comedian types who make everyone laugh (e.g. Eddie Murphy, Will Smith etc).

In reality, if you're not one of them, then you may struggle to get attention as a black guy... unless you're very good looking (a good looking guy is a good looking guy; regardless of his ethnic background). Alternatively, if you don't mind dating someone who's "a bit foreign", maybe consider Eastern European girls, as they tend to be a bit more open minded (the ones in London, at least). Personally, I've had most luck with Polish & Russian girls... but that's just my own experience, it may be different for you, but maybe an avenue to try.

The guys who get random attention on the street are those who stand out from the crowd. Being very good looking is the obvious way (without going out in some kind of fancy dress). While 6'2" is a good height, I don't think that, on its own would be enough to make you really stand out; and considering about 10% of London's population is black, you'd need a bit more than that as well. Have you considered moving to (or at least visiting) a town / place where there aren't many black people? as that would make you stand out (Caveat:- do your research first and make sure it's not a racist area lol).

If you're willing to put some graft in, you could go to the gym and train to get better arms and lose the belly... make a start now, and by the time summer comes you're bound to have a more defined physique.

Failing that, your best bet would be to meet people by networking (as others have already mentioned). By this, I mean joining social groups or evening classes that interest you... or meeting friends of friends, and interact with them. This will allow your personality / character to shine through, and you never know your luck... you may even get with someone who (dare I say it) would never have considered dating a black guy before.

(edited 1 month ago)

I feel like im invisible

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