My best friend doesn’t like me

I have been friends with this guy for about a year now, in the span of the year, two other guys have liked me in the process. That I wasn’t interested in because they weren’t him. During this time period we have gotten really close! but the problem is that I’m like in love with him. We have done so much together and I talk and he listens, we goof off so much and recently we have just been hanging out one on one. But not in the way you are thinking. He’s the sweetest guy I have ever met and so amazing that I hate him for it. I have told this guy everything and I have been so vulnerable and he has to. Just to the amount he’s comfortable telling me. Now he loves my family and my family loves him, we went to a trip to California together JUST AS FRIENDS! NO MONKEY BUSINESS OR ANYTHING!! My family paid for him to go to a very expensive amusement park for crying out loud and he is still NOT INTERESTED! I’m obsessive over this guy but recently I have resented him and it’s horrible. We share the same music taste and frequently send eachother songs and text eachother. Which is crazy because I love him triple the amount when we listen and sing to music together. We also have a future! BUT GOD FORBID WE ARE MARRIED IN THE FUTURE!! NO!! The dream we BOTH SHARE!! Is that we own a farm that we both live on. We homeschool our kids, but not OUR KIDS OF COURSE. It ****es me off dude. This guy is way too friendly or something. And you’re probably wondering “oh he probably likes you!” He doesn’t. trust me I know that. He doesn’t. We flirt sometimes but it’s not to the point where it’s like crazy it’s just playful. And now I just hate seeing him now. Like I hate it. I know he doesn’t like me and every time he asks to go on a drive or something of course I’m going to say yes! Because I’m freaking infatuated and I hate it! And I’m not confessing. I can’t ruin our friendship. And we are also in a sort of friend group. And I see him all the time. And he texts me everyday. And it’s torture. I cry so much and I respond and neglect myself so much just for a couple of seconds of his time. idk. I just can’t. And when a guy shows interest in me he tells me to go for it and my stomach drops and despair fills my brain. I hate I hate I hate him. But I don’t hate him and that’s what’s the problem. I tried to think of Icks and every single time I just think he looked cute. And he is. And I hate it so much. We use to do all-nighters every week in highschool with my other friend too. Just when we first started being friends. But a lot of the case the all-nighters would end in my other friend sleeping and me and him would sing Tyler the creator or any artist we liked at the time. Man… I can’t do this anymore. And I feel bad because of how much I’ve resented him. He hasn’t done anything wrong. I feel so weak and I feel so stupid because he just thinks we like BFFs or something. I’ve tried so many times to forget the feeling I have but they always resurface when I see him. He’s such a beautiful person. And I love him so much. But I can’t do this anymore. I can’t I just can’t I feel so weak. I asked my friend for advice and he just told me to wait it out to see if he ends up liking me too. What do you guys think?