I'm a PhD student (35) at a university. I came in contact with the ethics officer (hes now 47 years old) at my university in 2019 when I worked in the office briefly as well with ethics approval regarding my thesis. He always seemed very helpful and friendly and I liked him as a person. He also helped me a lot by sending events related stuff and for many things regarding my research.
However, after I finished my thesis, I met up with him because I wanted to work in the research office again and he kept saying he was looking for am assistant for himself. We made plans and I met up with him and he was saying nice things to me like one day I will be the Head of the Research at the university etc. We exchanged numbers and he also took me out with him. Later on, we hooked up as well and began texting a lot. He would come over to my house and we sexted the entire day. He would send nudes of himself or pictures without shirt and I also sent bikini photos. I didn't send full nudes. He also has a cat and he would regularly send pictures of his act, of himself, older pictures of himself ( his hairline is extremely receded and he has a bald patch so he only takes photos from his eyes onwards). We weren't a couple but we were "something".
This went on for 2 months until he suddenly stopped replying to me. He began showing disinterest in my texts and completely stopped replying to my texts. I texted him so many times but he wouldn't respond to any even though he was coming online a lot.
I was so stressed and anxious that he wasn't replying to my texts so I went to the research office looking for him. He wasn't in the office that day. I met his colleagues and told them if he still works in this department and how I have been texting him but he's not responding. Later on that day, I texted him threatening him that I went to his office and I will go again and tell them everything and he finally replied saying he didn't see my messages ( LYING), how our relationship is only professional and how there is no vacancy for an assistant due to toxic work culture. I stopped texting him after that. Turns out there wasn't any assistant and he was just spreading this nonsense to bait me to show interest in him.
I also found out that he was showing interest in another girl who worked in the office and had started texting and meeting her hence he stopped texting me.
However, he has continued to send me and 2 other students career related events newsletters even after this fiasco.
4 months later, he texted me saying how I can apply for a fellowship and was sending pictures of his cat. He also started saying that he would like to meet up outside of work and on two Saturdays he came to meet me at the university. Even saying sorry to me.
I was suspicious so I asked one of my friends who is good friend with his colleague and she told me that that girl he had been texting and meeting left the job as well as the country and it will be a few months until he comes back. She also told me that the girl had told her that he was always trying to sext with her, send the same racy pics of himself and cat and eventually got bored because she isn't here physically so now he's stopped texting her and that is why he is looking to rekindle things with me.
That girl is also young (early 30s) . I have noticed a pattern with him that he only talks to women who are significantly younger than him and only talks about hot legs, hot ass and he also used to send me gifs of characters kissing ass etc. He also demeans a lot of people calling them ugly.
I don't know what to do. Should I continue to meet him since he's stopped texting her and resumed interest in me?